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Supreme Court Wisely Declines To Hear Roger Clemens' Dumbass Appeal
Reassuring news out of DC today: the US Supreme Court—which hears less than one percent of the cases appealed there anyway—has declined to hear Roger Clemens' appeal re: his silly defamation case against former trainer Brian McNamee. Many moons ago, Clemens sued McNamee after he dished on Clemens' s...

Our Old Friend John Salley Says O.J. Was Innocent
Onetime Deadspin contributor John Salley joined 790 The Ticket's The Jorge Sedano Show for an interview that will air tomorrow morning. In it, Sedano asked Salley who he considered—aside from himself—to be the best thespian/athlete....

Floyd Landis Is Sparring With Lance Armstrong Under A Strange Twitter Pseudonym
Outside magazine has the story of temporary 2006 Tour de France champion Floyd Landis and his anti-Lance-Armstrong Tweeting collective. Right now, they're holding court at @GreyManrod....

American Patriot Tim Howard Thinks Soccer Ceremonies In America Should Be Conducted In American English
Your morning roundup for June 26, a day after a man who lost his arm to a rocket in Afghanistan caught a foul ball....

Nets Owner Elected Head Of Russian "Opposition" Party That Really Won't "Oppose" The Kremlin
After he was elected the head of Right Cause — a Russian political party "once openly anti-Kremlin, but more recently the party has been led by loyal personalities" — Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov said he probably wouldn't publicly call bad-ass Prime Minister Vladimir V. Putin out publicly....

Ritually Edgy T-Shirts Prompt Ritual Coverage Of Ritually Outraged Criticism
The Associated Press reports that the dry-goods sales-and-marketing company Nike has provoked a reaction by selling t-shirts designed to provoke a reaction. The shirts include "the phrases 'Dope,' 'Get High' and 'Ride Pipe,'" the AP reports....

Dead Wrestler Of The Week: Brian "Crush" Adams
An occasional feature in which we honor the sport's fallen and examine their legacies. Today: Brian "Crush" Adams, who died in 2007 after accidentally ingesting a lethal mixture of prescription drugs....

Four Last-Minute Delusions Around The NBA Draft
Basketball Has A Bright Future In The Garden State: Oh, Newark. Newark. The Nets got tired of looking at New Jersey, filed for divorce, and moved out of the Meadowlands. Brooklyn is so much richer, more sophisticated-it's just a better match. Don't you want the Nets to be happy? Oh, but Brooklyn's p...

<em>Hollywood Reporter</em> Refutes <em>Daily Mail</em> Story About O.J. Confessing To Oprah That Cited <em>National Enquirer</em> Story That Doesn't Exist
As you were, Internet. [Hollywood Reporter]...

Daniel Sedin Wins The Important Hardware: A Broken Trophy
The NHL awards were last night; we didn't watch. (Mostly a Jay Mohr thing.) So we couldn't tell you what outfit the readers of Seventeen picked out for Jeff Skinner, or if the pointless Jennings Trophy was handed beforehand, like the technical Oscars....

"He's Got A Great Personality": Your Passive-Aggressive 2011 NBA Draft Scouting Roundup
The NBA playoffs are over; the NBA Draft is here. Time to stop watching Dirk Nowitzki, LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Kevin Durant, Derrick Rose, and Chris Paul, and to start dreaming about the future—a future in which, honestly, none of this year's prospects have much hope of being better than the leag...

Sadistic Ulster Talk Show Host Made 9-Year-Old Rory McIlroy Chip Into An Unfairly Small Washing Machine
This look at the origins of our Ror(y)gasm comes via Devil Ball Golf:...

Someone Compiled A Top 10 List Of Racist And/Or Xenophobic Moments In Wrestling
Among the angles pursued in this collection of rasslin' segments are slave master, pigs-feet eater, physically kicking Mexicans back across the border, proper roles in life for those with nappy hair and Asian language mockery, sometimes with subtlety, sometimes without. Yep, that about sums it up....

Little Girl Muay Thai Match Ended In A Draw With No Fatalities
Both "Princess" Jasmine Parr and Georgina "Punch Out" Barton survived their showdown in the ring in Australia today. Each won some coin for their efforts, too....

The Masked Man Writes About Live Wrestlers For Once
His entrance music is playing on the Grantland jumbotron, and he's strutting down the aisle. Check out his first piece over there, featuring a Father's Day WWE preview and the revealing of his secret identity. Don't worry, Dead Wrestler Of The Week will continue to have a home here. [Grantland]...

Cock-Sucking Son Of A Bitch MLB Players Were Warned About Swearing, Those Cunt-Lapping Bastards
As part of an 1898 campaign to curb the use of foul language in baseball, this memo was purportedly sent to every team. It stands as a fascinating record of Gay Nineties profanity, which doesn't actually sound outdated at all....

Too <em>Moneyball</em> For Their Own Good: How The Mets Screwed Up The Kazmir Trade
The Angels released Scott Kazmir on Wednesday, and we had seen it coming for years. Hitters clobbered Kazmir in 2009, 2010, and, in his one 2011 start. He lost his control and velocity simultaneously, and stopped striking hitters out....

The FBI Is Investigating The Tyler Hamilton-Lance Armstrong Restaurant Run-In
Move this story off Versus and onto TruTV—the feds are getting involved and talking about witness tampering. Whoa....

What It's Like To Fall In Front Of A Speeding Formula One Car — Twice
It's scary, mainly. This steward (marshal?) at yesterday's waterlogged Canadian Grand Prix was trying to clear debris from the track when he went down on the rain-slicked road, and had trouble regaining his feet. It's like Steamboat Bill Jr. wandered into Tom Pryce's final race....

Canadian Press Is Really, Really In The Tank For Canucks
This ain't a hometown columnist, folks. Although it would be frivolous even in that case. Rather, this is wire copy (from Canada's leading newswire, the Canadian Press), an ostensibly evenhanded piece about the series between Vancouver and Boston, supposedly fit for all journalistic outlets in Canad...