pr Page 758 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Rough Season For The Flyers Naturally Leads To Cuckolding Rumors
A season that many thought would be a promising turning point for the Philadelphia Flyers has devolved into a chaotic nightmare of failed playoff dreams. So obviously someone must be banging a teammate's wife, right?...
Don't Root Against North Carolina On Their Home Court Or You Will Be Ousted By Roy Williams
Yesterday, scrappy Presbyterian College from Clinton, South Carolina waddled into the Dean Dome to get predictably stomped by the Tar Heels. That still didn't stop coach Roy Williams from tossing a Blue Hose fan for...yelling at his team during free-throws....
Patriot Mascot Nabbed In Prostitution Sting
In what can only be described as a shocking lack of Common Sense, Pat Patriot was among 14 people arrested in Providence, RI for "prostitution related crimes."...
Hank Gola Leaves The Yard
It was bound to happen eventually that a blushing sportswriter would pick up his crayons and write something about Tiger Woods so egregiously stupid that it'd make Mark Whicker look like Grantland Rice. Take it away, Hank Gola....
Kick 'Em In The Grill, Pete
Amazing tale of Prime Minister Pete Nice, former member of whitey hip-hop group 3rd Bass, and his involvement in the shady sports memorabilia market, which has left him holding just a box of Newports. And Puma sweats. [SI]...
Jimmy Clausen Will Take His Swagger And Tiny Bathing Suits To The NFL
The Jimmy tells ESPN.com that "it's time" and he's taking Charlie Weis' sage advice: "He thought I've improved so much since I came to Notre Dame. So, I'm taking his advice, and I'm going to head out." [ESPN][Pic:Collegegameballs.com]...
Man Dating Woman Made Famous For Anti-Homo Pageant Speech/Sex Tape Will Start For Rams
Kyle Boller. You remember him. He was Joe Flacco before it was fashionable to be Joe Flacco. Now, Boller will most likely start in place of the broken-legged Marc Bulger. [Sky Sports/Photo: Radar]...
Ricky Williams - Battier Than You Realized
Williams credits his success and durability this season to a new type of alternative medicine. No, he doesn't mean weed, as we're all assuming. Ricky's "pranic healing" regimen is far stranger....
The Basement Tapes: A Compendium Of Sportswriters' Hacky Jokes About Bloggers
Woody Paige, the orange person always yelling on your television set, recently disagreed with someone on the Internet. He then made a joke suggesting that the blogger still lives in his mother's house. Have you heard this one?...
The Derek-Jeter-Hits-The-Beach-With-A-Starlet Photos Will Make You Miserable
Our Captain is off on his annual off-season jaunt to a humid location with a young, bikini-clad actress-person whom he will most likely never settle down with and, unfortunately for him, there was a slimy photog in the palm tree....
Wrestling Still Real On One Misguided Continent
It's laughable that some American newspapers put pro wrestling in the sports section, but it could be worse. It could be in the news section, as it is for one Aussie paper that doesn't seem to understand it's fake....
Jenn Sterger's Post-Op Recovery Documented Via Twitter
Will Carroll, America's most prominent Injury Expert, became her Nightingale last weekend after her surgery. Not a euphemism. [InjuryExpert]...
“My Coach Broke My Collarbone.” Your First Edition Of A-HOLE COACH DIGEST
I've been thinking about terrible coaches lately. Coaches that are not merely incompetent, but also paranoid, megalomaniacal, and prickish. Coaches that are praised for having such qualities, particularly at the college and high school levels....
Tony Romo Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Tony Romo, who won the weekend by not making a complete spectacle of himself. When no one notices you, you're probably doing your job right....
What Terrible Football Organization Will You Be Protesting This Weekend?
Are you a football fan? Then there's a good chance your favorite team sucks. Sorry. But if you really want people to feel your pain, you'll organize some sort of protest of upper management, because that always makes things better....
Whores Are Coming To Dallas
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Owning A Russian Basketball Team Can Be Hazardous To Your Health
If future Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov ever invites you to watch a game in the owner's box, don't accept. Not only will you be stuck watching the Nets, there's a decent chance you'll be caught up in an assassination attempt....
Is This Hubris, Or Did They Play Game 6 And Not Tell Anyone?
You'd think this would be a bigger story. Apparently they decided to play baseball last night after all, and the Yankees won. Huh....
So, About This 'Hugh Johnson Project' Bit...(UPDATED)
As a newcomer to weekend duties, I am unfamiliar with the Hugh Johnson Project. My esteemed colleague Gourmet Spud resurrected it and I would like to do the same. Let me know in the comments how to go about it....