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Why Your Team Sucks: Cincinnati Bengals
Some people are fans of the Cincinnati Bengals. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Cincinnati Bengals. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: Kansas City Chefs
Some people are fans of the Kansas City Chiefs. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Kansas City Chiefs. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: Buffalo Bills
Some people are fans of the Buffalo Bills. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Buffalo Bills. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: San Diego Chargers
Some people are fans of the San Diego Chargers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the San Diego Chargers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: Miami Dolphins
Some people are fans of the Miami Dolphins. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Miami Dolphins. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sacks: New England Patriots
Some people are fans of the New England Patriots. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New England Patriots. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter grou......

Why Your Team Sucks: Oakland Raiders
Some people are fans of the Oakland Raiders. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Oakland Raiders. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Erin Andrews Opens Up To Oprah And ESPN Finally Says Something
The world waits in rapt funeral amazement September 11, when we'll see Erin Andrews props herself on the important chair with Oprah Winfrey to share her horrifying tale of peepdom with America's Mom Nation. A summary of her appearance....

Erin Andrews To Sit Down And Weep On Oprah September 11
So says Deitsch Tweets: The timing of this event couldn't be anymore perfect. Mourn appropriately. If you or anyone you know was at the taping last week, contact me ([email protected]), please. [RichardDeitsch] (Full release after jump)...

Why Your Team Sucks: New York Jets (Featuring Confessions Of A Meadowlands Security Guard)
Some people are fans of the New York Jets. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New York Jets. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

You Made Rich Rodriguez Cry
ESPN interrupted Bill Belichick getting choked up over Teddy Bruschi so America could watch Rich Rodriguez get choked up about all the mean things the Detroit Free Press wrote about him. Why are our football coaches so sad?...

Player-Coach Leads Team To Championship While Pregnant
Sky Blue FC won the first Women's Professional Soccer League championship last weekend, but didn't find out until the champagne celebration that their coach-slash-captain, Christie Rampone, is three months pregnant. No, she didn't play barefoot....

Why Your Team Sucks: Denver Broncos
Some people are fans of the Denver Broncos. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Denver Broncos. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: St. Louis Rams
Some people are fans of the St. Louis Rams. But many, many more people, like reader Adam S. are NOT fans of the St. Louis Rams. Adam's 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. ...

Why Your Team Sucks: Green Bay Packers
Some people are fans of the Green Bay Packers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Green Bay Packers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Greatest Minor League Promotion Ever Ruined By Wrath Of Tebow
The Fort Myers Miracle planned to pay homage to that miracle-maker Tim Tebow tonight, but what happened instead? Try an approaching tornado, an aborted circumcision, and a cease-and-desist letter from UF. God does not take kindly to your mockery....

Why Your Team Sucks: San Francisco 49ers
Some people are fans of the San Francisco 49ers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the San Francisco 49ers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: Chicago Bears
Some people are fans of the Chicago Bears. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Chicago Bears. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: BUZZSAW
Some people are fans of the Arizona Cardinals. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Arizona Cardinals. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Why Your Team Sucks: Detroit Lions
Some people are fans of the Detroit Lions. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Detroit Lions. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....