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Yard Work Upgrades, Eviscerates Peter King
Congrats to the wacky folks at Yard Work, who have revamped their site with a shiny new URL and an archive that could judiciously be called "improved." They blast off the new site with a pretty biting satire of Peter King's Monday Morning Quarterback column, which begins with a pretty fantastic im...
Bob Costas: Hysterical In His Own Mind
Don't know if any of you saw this or not, but everybody's favorite Sports Dwarf In A Suit Bob Costas was a guest on "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" last evening. It was a bizarre appearance. Our problem with Costas has never been that he isn't smart (because he constantly reminds us that, yes, h...
Now They Are <em>Literally</em> Convicts On The Field
Reason No. 32,452 that people in other countries are infinitely more unhealthy about their sports than we are: Welsh Premier team Carmarthen Town has signed a man who is currently in jail. Craig Hughes, who plays some position called "striker," was banned from attending soccer games for eight year...
Mistakes At Si.com
Interesting note on SI.com right now. On Michael Silver's column is the following rejoiner:...
Set Tivos To "Thug"
For you night owls who just can't handle hearing Bryan Adams on SportsCenter anymore, we suggest tuning in to ESPN2 tonight at 12:30 ET. It's a special show called "It's The Shoes" — part of ESPN2's "Block Party" — with Eagles wide receiver asspain Terrell Owens and rapper Trick Daddy (who, impres...
Oprah Winfrey, The New Lombardi
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson is notorious for being talented, brash and way-too-loud-mouthed. Kind of like Oprah! OK, not really, but Johnson confesses that the real point of his football career is to figure out a way to make it on Oprah's show. Johnson says:...
Smith's Terror Begins In Less Than Two Weeks
We are but nine days away from the launch of NBA "analyst" Stephen A. Smith's "Quite Frankly With Stephen A. Smith," the new live-studio chat show, or, as we like to call it, "What The Hell Is Wrong With The Treble On This Television?" Smith, whose wide-eyed stare straight into the camera makes u...
ESPN Angers Non-Crack Addict Mayor
From the signs your mayor has too much time on his hands department (and/or is a serious masochist), District of Columbia mayor Anthony Williams is pissed that ESPN isn't taking its road show to the nation's capital. Even worse, he offered to show ESPN bloviator Chris Berman around town....
ESPN Spreads Its Terror Across The Land
Those who were up to watch SportsCenter this morning know that ESPN's already obnoxious "50 States, 50 Days" promotion has begun. The idea, in case it hasn't been sucked down into your soul by now, is that SportsCenter will be at a different location every day for the next 50 days, or pretty much ju...
NBA Draft Predictions: Trying To Piss In The Dark While Handcuffed
As previously mentioned, the NBA Draft is tonight. This, of course, is a completely random exercise with 30 different variables liable to change their minds for no particular reason at any given moment. But sportswriters get bored, so we present the Deadspin guide to mock drafts by people who don'...
Tracking The Sportswriter Hacks
Yesterday, we speculated how much backtracking each of the major sports pundits would do if they were wrong about last night's Game 7 of the NBA Finals. Here's a look:...
This, Of Course, Means You Can't Use Your Hands In Heaven
It's actually kind of surprising we haven't heard of this before, though if it were to happen, it was obviously going to be soccer. The Reading soccer club of England can now buy an officially licensed coffin. The coffin weighs 500 pounds and is a "blue and white striped coffin adorned with the c...
If There Were Anyone To Fire, Someone Would Totally Be Fired
In this week's Sports Illustrated, Michael Silver writes a long-winded piece about the resurgence of women's softball, not just on a collegiate level, but also in the pro realm. He warbles extensively about Jennie Finch's role on the Chicago Bandits, a professional team that played its first game ye...
The Colin Ferguson Of Soccer
Well, it's not quite as bad as defending yourself for murder — though also not quite as entertaining — but it'll do for now. Soccer "star" El-Hadji Diouf has been taking some real heat for using a public defender to represent him against charges of spitting on an 11-year-old last November. (They c...
Sports Illustrated Keeps Finger On The Web Pulse
Featured Web site in Sports Illustrated's "SI Players" section this week: ManuGinobili.com....
Just Thinking Out Loud Here ...
Major congrats to the Montclair (N.J.) High School softball team, which scored two major upsets to advance to the Essex County finals Saturday night before falling to Caldwell High 1-0 in eight innings. Caitlyn Bishop, you're doing one incredible job as Mary Beth King's heir in the circle. This team...
SI.com: The Web's Pauly Shore
From the things that were a bad idea from the start department: Some poor sucker at SI.com tries an imaginary conversation between Larry David and Nate Newton. Highlight: So? It bothers me. Sitting within a 10-foot radius of this kind of gluttony bothers me. And what I am supposed to do when I'm fin...
SI.com's Fun Advertorials
We'll be honest: We don't know who Rob Stanger is. According to the bio that runs with his new column on SI.com, he is the head teaching pro at the Golf Academy at Mission Hills in Rancho Mirage, Calif., is recognized as a Golf magazine Top Teacher in America in the West Region. How this qualifies h...
SI.com's Tortured Crawl Toward Relevance
Poor SI.com. Two years ago, ESPN.com's Page 2 took them so far by surprise that by the time they realized what had happened, Page 2 had already become stale and boring. (Except for you, Bill! We love you, Bill!) The undignified pant continues with a Sports and Star Wars: The Connection, a sad, tired...
USA Today Keeps Its Finger On The Pulse
Lots of hot topics in sports news these days: Steroids. Amphetamines. Racism in the NBA. That thing on Scoop Jackson's lip. But USA Today is keeping us abreast of the hot issues: Native American mascots! The nation's best-selling hotel doormat rips the lid off the Massive, Late-Breaking Controversy....