ric Page 618 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rick Reilly® Has Annoyed A New Constituency: Pizza Delivery People
Reilly® tossed off this little item the other day about Hawaii's quarterback, Bryant Moniz, who moonlights as a pizza delivery guy. Bad jokes ensued ("Hawaii fans go pie-eyed ..."), amusing precisely no one. Least of all other pizza delivery guys....

Popeye Jones Arrested, Gets Free Makeover From Police
Former Maverick draft pick and current Dallas assistant Popeye Jones was popped himself this weekend—nailed with a DUI and the nailed in the face when he resisted arrest. Ahhh, that's justice ... Texas style!...

Congress Gets Involved In Concussion Debate, Fails To Solve Everything
Goodell, along with NFLPA leader DeMaurice Smith and other people in suits, was grilled by the House Judiciary Committee about all this stuff they've been hearing about "concussions" and "permanent brain damage." The Commish talked a great deal about all the many things the league is doing—rule chan...

Breaking: Rick Reilly® Makes Another Dental Joke
Reilly®, doing the dumb "Nick Swisher loosens up the Yankees" story that everyone got out of his system in April, notes, "Swisher is a guy who won't stop laughing even when he brushes his teeth." Chew on that. [ESPN]...

Cedric Benson Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cedric Benson, who won the weekend by making the Chicago Bears look foolish. Granted, he's not the first....

Is It Time For The "Is Hockey Too Violent" Debate Already? (UPDATE)
In a sport where players and fans prize bonecrushing hits, everyone pretends to be surprised when one of those hits sends someone to the hospital. Let the hand wringing commence....

Tuomo Ruutu Suspended Three Games For Dirty Hit On Dirty Player
Carolina Hurricanes forward Tuomo Ruutu has been suspended for three games (and forfeits $59,067.36 in salary) for boarding Colorado Avalance forward Darcy Tucker last night. This will now conclude the NHL broadcasting day here on Deadspin.(hums O Canada) [TSN.ca]...

Tuomo Ruutu Will Drink Your Milkshake!
Then he will take the glass it was served in and bash you in the face with it. There was a scary moment last night during the Colorado Avalanche-Carolina Hurricanes game when Tuomo Ruutu viciously and recklessly boarded Darcy Tucker....

UFC 104: Urine For A Good Fight
In advance of tomorrow's UFC 104, let us pause for a moment to consider the merits of drinking your own piss....

Phillies Win 16-Team "Who Gets To Lose To The Yankees" Tournament
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Philly Newsman Wants You To Ride The "Cooch Train"
Fox29's Mike Jerrick did some fantastic “man on the street” reporting for “Good Day Philly” today, interviewing high school kids in sombreros, beating a taxi cab driver with an oar, and then asking youths to ride the “Cooch Train.” Brilliant....

Eric Mangini Deserves Your Scorn ... But How Much Scorn?
Rolling Stone magazine's insult comic dog Matt Taibbi recently took a break from his assault on capitalist swine like Goldman Sachs to turn his wrath on a bigger and more menacing target—Cleveland Browns coach Eric Mangini....

A Flying Squirrel Mascot Is Not Totally Nuts
The winning entry in the "name Richmond, Virginia's new minor league baseball team" contest is: The Flying Squirrels. I can't wait for their giant foam mascot to scare the crap out of little children. [WTVR/Times-Dispatch]...

It's A Dutiful Play In The Neighborhood
You know it's one of those postseasons when the umps are getting ripped even for getting the calls correct....

Cardinal Hoops Players Face Justice, Pitino Style
Louisville's Jerry Smith and Terrence Jennings were charged with misdemeanor counts of resisting law enforcement. Their coach says "it's serious" and they will be punished....just not in any way that involves playing time. Yes, that serious! [ESPN]...

Saints Rebuild New Orleans For Fourth Consecutive Year
October 15, 2009: "Saints Revive NOLA's Spirit" by CNN. Does anyone feel like they've heard this story before?...

A Children's Treasury Of Rick Reilly®'s Heat-Related Similes
Rick Reilly®, who yesterday brought word that Colt McCoy's girlfriend is "hotter than shrimp vindaloo," has long shown a fondness for thermodynamic analogy. We've collected a few examples, with helpful visual accompaniment....

Rick Reilly®'s Hornball Simile Propels Colt McCoy's Girlfriend Into Momentary Google Fame (UPDATE)
Colt McCoy, Rick Reilly® writes, "has a girlfriend hotter than shrimp vindaloo, Rachel Glandorf." The first thing you'll notice is that he's analogizing a woman to Indian cuisine. The second: He names her, awkwardly. And now look what he's done......

Delighting In Rick Reilly®'s Massively Wrong Broncos Predictions
Reilly® has written many nasty things about "Boy Blunder" Josh McDaniels and the Broncos, presumably because the latter hired the former to replace his tandem-bike partner, Mike Shanahan. Now that Reilly's 4-12 prediction is a mathematical impossibility, let us revisit....

Marshall's AD Is Surrounded By College Girls
Until he can find permanent housing, Mike Hamrick is living in an all-female dorm wing. He's living every man's dream, except the women are all half his age. So, yeah, he's living every man's dream. [The Parthenon]...