ric Page 618 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The (Mobile) Internet Is For Porn
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Small Child No Good At Sports, Cries; By The Way, He's In The Pros
Mauricio Baldivieso turns 13 tomorrow. As an early birthday present, his coach got him into the game for a first-division Bolivian soccer side. Did we mention the coach is his father?...
Giant Inflatable Penis Owner Explains Herself, Giant Inflatable Penis
Many will remember this year's American Century Championship for Tony Romo's valiant efforts and Rick Rhoden's continued dominance of the tournament, but the big, bright shining star of Saturday's action was a six-foot dong peeking over Michael Jordan's shoulder....
Crumpet? I Hardly Know It!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Big Leaguers Just Wanna Use Gordon Beckham's Love Tonight
Everyone wants a piece of Gordon Beckham. And by everyone, I mean, of course, the throngs of Chicago women wearing his T-shirt jersey and his fellow big leaguers who are copping his swoon-worthy at-bat music....
Rick Reilly® In A One-Piece: Toothsome
Reilly® squeezes into a LZR Racer in tonight's edition of that Homecoming show no one is watching. This one features Michael Phelps and a hack columnist's left nipple. [ESPN]...
Not Gay Richard Jefferson Let His Girl Down Easy
Richard Jefferson is in full damage control mode after supposedly dumping his fianceé by emailing her at the altar or something. He's setting the story straight about the Black AMEX, the shadiness, and the money. Oh, and the gayness....
Rick Pitino Didn't Do That Thing Karen Sypher Said He Did, Probably
Louisville police will not prosecute Rick Pitino for whatever it is Karen Sypher allegedly tried to blackmail him with. So I guess we'll never get a steamy "Law & Order"-style courtroom drama starring the saucy Cardinals coach....
Lamest Excuse Ever Helps Tennis Player Beat Drug Rap
French tennis player Richard Gasquet told officials that the reason he tested positive for cocaine last March was because he kissed a woman who had cocaine on her lips....and that worked! Suspension over! It's strip club time! [BBC]...
Richard Jefferson In "The Runaway Groom"
New Spur Richard Jefferson was supposed to get married this weekend, but he put his fianceé on the train to Dumpsville just days before the nuptials. If only he'd remembered to tell his guests....
Rick Morrissey Uses Dead Baseball Scribe As A Soapbox For Blog Rant
Here's a thoroughly obnoxious column by the Chicago Tribune's Rick Morrissey in which he picks up the corpse of Jerome Holtzman and swings it in the general direction of — what else? — the blogosphere....
Journeyman Wide Receivers Make You Question Your Mortality
Derrick Mason retired yesterday. He is my favorite Spartan football player of all time. We both graduated from Michigan State in the same year. He had a productive 12-year NFL career. I do this....
Robert Lunn Leaves Austria With His Dignity (Mostly) Intact
Robert Lunn is a former defensive tackle from UConn. He graduated in 2008 and was playing professional football in Pörtschach, Austria. Sadly, he's back in the U.S. now, so this is his final column....
Rich Eisen Thanks You For Your Concern About His Horninesss
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Finding Mustachioed Men In St. Louis Will Win You All-Star Game Tickets
The All-Star Game is rife with "bare-faced mortals," so the American Mustache Institute — bless their whiskers — is sponsoring a so-called Stache Dash. Find playing cards of mustachioed legends, win bleacher seats. No facial hair necessary. [AMI]...
Minor Leaguer Pushes Hit Streak To 45 Games
Mariners prospect Jamie McOwen has hit safely in 45-straight games, which pretty much means he's better than Pete Rose. Of course, that also means he's not as good as legendary sluggers Otto Pahlman and Harry Chozen, but them's the breaks....
Rick Reilly® Celebrates After Scoring Big Interview With Lance Armstrong's Ass
But before that, Rick Reilly® was apparently wandering aimlessly on a French road and this nice photographer lady picked him up. Then they went back to the hotel and slammed beers....
The Critic-Proofing Of Lance Armstrong
The ad you see here is the new Lance Armstrong spot for Nike, which would be merely standard-issue, inspiromatic marketing schlock if it didn't come so creepily close to suggesting that to criticize Lance now is to somehow enable cancer....
Lisa Leslie: Expect Bricks
The Superstars was only an hour this week! (Stupid Michael Jackson tributes.) But could they pack 90 minutes of excitement into just one tiny action-packed primetime block? Who likes missed lay-ups?...
Yankees Will Deign To Respect Our Civil Liberties
Bradford Campeau-Laurion — the guy who was drummed out of Yankee Stadium for trying to tinkle during the Yankees' seventh-inning tribute to compelled patriotism, the playing of "God Bless America" — has settled his lawsuit against the team and city....