rio Page 195 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Predictions For Every Olympic Gold Medal<em></em>
For some people, the Olympics are about athleticism, national pride, the drama of the human spirit, and all that jazz. For them, my ranking of every single Olympic medal event is a handy primer for what’s worth paying attention to....
All 306 Olympic Medal Events, Ranked
My friend Danny always says that the Olympics is a great opportunity to reflect upon how we have grown or regressed during the past four years. Four years ago I was working for NBC during the Olympics. I was getting paid thousands of dollars to watch television. My office was the Saturday Night Live...
With Heavy-Handed Symbolism, Officials Lose Keys To Olympic Stadium
Let the Games begin, once they can just get this damn thing open....
Mass Protests Are Following The Olympic Torch All Over Rio
Financially speaking, the Olympics are a huge scam that allows Olympic committees, bureaucrats, and contractors to get rich at the expense of Brazil’s government and its citizens. Brazil’s economy is in the toilet, and it has a staggering inequality problem. There have been protests the entire time ...
Olympic Soccer Crowd Trolls Hope Solo With "Zika!" Chants
A week ago, United States national team keeper Hope Solo posted a pair of photos on her Instagram showing off the extremely large arsenal of anti-mosquito products she was bringing to Brazil to stave off the Zika virus. This afternoon, in the United States’ opening win over New Zealand, she was roas...
The Modern Olympics Were Founded By A French Baron Who Was Sad That France Kept Losing Wars<em></em>
If you were looking to create an object that was the perfect physical manifestation of the Summer Olympics’ contradictory relationship with the partially invented history they sprang from, you could do a lot worse than the Olympic Torch....
Please Enjoy Michael And Martellus Bennett Roasting The Rest Of The NFL
ESPN’s Mina Kimes has written a great profile of Michael and Martellus Bennett, the two brothers who consistently provide the best soundbites in the NFL. The whole story is an enjoyable read, but one highlight is the brothers issuing raw takes on other figures around the league....
Olympic Reporters Are Hungry And Cranky
Reporters are the complainingest people on earth, and these Olympics are giving them plenty to complain about—not a good combination. Today’s outrage: a severe lack of food options inside the media center. ...
Japanese Gymnast Reportedly Racks Up $5,000 Bill Playing <i>Pokémon Go</i> At The Olympics
Kohei Uchimura is a six-time world champion gymnast, a four-time gold medalist at the Olympics, and, apparently, an aspiring Pokémon trainer. Playing Pokémon Go in different locales can be a great way to accrue a collection of new monsters, but it can also cost you severely. Uchimura reportedly play...
Golf At The Olympics Will Be Played In A Goddamn Zoo<em></em>
The golf tournament at the Rio Olympics starts next Thursday. This is the first time golf has been at the Olympics since 1904, but stars like Jason Day, Jordan Spieth, and Dustin Johnson will not be there. However, a bunch of capybaras, sloths, and other critters (like mini crocodiles) will....
Team USA Did Some Cool Dunks Tonight
The best highlight that the future gold medal-winning basketball dudes of Team USA produced this week was DeMarcus Cousins mocking Draymond Green for broadcasting his dong to the masses. However, they smoked Nigeria by 44 points in a tune-up game tonight, and in the process, dunked the ball a lot....
The Olympics Are For Humans, Not Horses
What is the purpose of the Olympics? For the few thousand bureaucrats who divvy up the Games, give out contracts, and get kickass bribes, it is to enrich themselves. For everyone outside of the corruption apparatus of the Olympics, they are an exhibit of the best sportspeople, playing their sports. ...
All The Olympic Sports Should Be Outdoors
“Indoors” does not care what the season is. Seasons do not exist indoors. That is the whole reason we have indoors. When you stick a seasonal specifier like “Summer” or “Winter” in front of your event, your event has to take place in that actual season, which is outdoors. That is science. Therefore ...
Rio's Water Is Still Full Of Filth And Viruses
The Summer Olympics begin in four days in Rio de Janeiro, and the city’s waterways are still so dirty that one expert is recommending that anyone who visits the city should avoid putting their head under water....
Staying In Rio Presents Some Challenges
In the coming weeks we’ll be hearing plenty from the Olympic athletes about their Rio accommodations. (The Australians, who declared their rooms “uninhabitable” due to leaks and exposed wiring, must be feeling great after they were not alerted to an emergency evacuation on Friday due to a small fire...
Report: The Olympics Opening Ceremony Features Gisele Bündchen Getting Assaulted<em></em>
That supermodel Gisele would have a role in this week’s Olympics opening ceremony was a given, and previous reports indicated the Brazilian supermodel would have a “sexy starring role.” But reports from witnesses of Sunday’s opening ceremony dress rehearsal explained to Brazil’s UOL that Tom Brady’s...
Draymond Green: Dick Pics "Will Help Propel Me To The Next Level As A Basketball Player"<em></em>
After initially claiming he’d been hacked, Golden State Warriors groin-assaulter Draymond Green today confessed to, and apologized for, having inadvertently sent out a dick pic on Snapchat. ...
![NBA Star Draymond Green Sends Out Dick Pic On Snapchat, Apologizes [NSFW]<em></em>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/jaiyttebrvyldbylhbfh.jpg)
NBA Star Draymond Green Sends Out Dick Pic On Snapchat, Apologizes [NSFW]<em></em>
Draymond Green’s long summer of cock and balls-related controversy—he kneed Steven Adams in the dick, swiped at LeBron’s dick, and acted like a dick—continues unabated. Earlier today, amidst pictures of Melo sleeping and general Team USA shenanigans, an artfully crafted dick pic showed up on Green’s...