rio Page 202 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The USMNT Is Getting Hot At Exactly The Right Time
After the USMNT lost 2-0 to Colombia last Friday, Jürgen Klinsmann was as optimistic as any coach will ever be after a scoreless tournament-opening loss. He told reporters he was “absolutely okay” with how his team played, and even said, “There was no difference besides the two goals.” While the exp...
Manny Machado Charges The Mound, Lights Up Yordano Ventura
After throwing at him earlier in the game, Yordano Ventura plunked Manny Machado in the fifth inning, prompting Machado to quickly remove his helmet, limp to the mound, and light into Ventura. It looks like he landed a decent string of punches before he got pulled off the Royals pitcher....
USA Olympics Basketball Players Are Dropping Like Flies
Team USA has dominated international basketball the last decade, but the team they take to the upcoming Rio Olympics might end up being their worst since the disastrous 2002 World Championships....
The Finals Are Butt And I'm So Mad At The Cavs
First things first: They get no credit for making the Finals. LeBron James could win three playoff series in the East with any four Supreme Court justices as his running mates. Account for that, and what have these bozos contributed to the effort?...
Six Ways The Cavs Can Get Back Into This Series
The Cleveland Cavaliers have been dominated by the Golden State Warriors through the first two games of the NBA Finals. Down 2-0, the Cavs are running short on chances to get back into the series, but I think they still have a shot if they make the following adjustments....
It Seems The Cavs Are Just Now Learning That The Warriors Play Small
The Warriors disemboweled the Cavaliers last night, winning by 33 in a game that didn’t feel that close, and while there are a million different reasons why, one of the biggest is how effectively Golden State played small. Down two to begin the second quarter, the Warriors went the next 12 minutes w...
Kevin Love In Concussion Protocol After Taking Elbow To The Head
This hasn’t exactly been the redemptive trip to the Finals Kevin Love was probably hoping for. After scoring 17 points and grabbing 13 rebounds in the Game 1 loss, Love had the worst night possible in Game 2. He scored five points and corralled three rebounds in 21 minutes, and had to remove himself...
Copa America Plays Wrong Anthem For Uruguay While Confused Players Look On
The Copa América Centenario has been a disaster thus far, with sparse crowds and uninteresting play marking the opening days of the scandal-soaked tournament. Things got even uglier tonight, as Glendale’s stadium played the wrong anthem for Uruguay before their match against Mexico....
The USMNT Needs To Go Young Or Die
The United States Men’s National Team will open the Copa America Centenario—a wonderfully entertaining Frankentournament that the U.S. is hosting only through sheer force of corruption—with a match against Colombia tonight in Santa Clara, Calif. Colombia is the shit. They could have taken down Brazi...
Should Intent Matter When A Lousy Player Whacks A Guy In The Dick And Balls?
For my money, the strangest moment of last night’s lopsided NBA Finals Game 1 came just after Cavaliers guard Matthew Dellavedova whacked Warriors forward Andre Iguodala in the dick and balls....
These 10 Displaced Athletes Will Compete For Refugee Olympic Team In Rio
In an IOC first, a Refugee Olympic Team, consisting of 10 athletes who fled their native countries due to war and persecution, will compete at the summer games in Rio. So, now you’ve got 10 more people to root for....
Shaun Livingston's Jumper Is The Poison On The Warriors' Blade
Imagine playing for the Cavaliers, and spending the better part of the last two nights stress-dreaming about how you will possibly be able to survive Steph Curry and Klay Thompson. Then imagine playing in Game 1 of the NBA Finals and escaping their wrath with nothing more than a 20-point flesh wound...
The Warriors Didn't Even Need Their Stars To Wallop The Cavs
Here’s how thorough the whooping the Warriors bench put on the Cavaliers in tonight’s 104-89 beatdown was: Shaun Livingston got a curtain call; the Cavs’ best highlight was a nutshot; Brandon Rush and Timofey Mozgov played; Golden State’s bench outscored Cleveland’s 45-5 before a brief garbage time ...
Matthew Dellavedova Thumps Andre Iguodala In The Dick And Balls
Earlier today, we had Matthew Dellavedova atop our rankings of the most hateable players in the NBA Finals, and he lived up to his billing in short order, striking the first blow against an opponent’s dick and balls. The victim? Andre Iguodala....
Donald Trump Doesn't Know Shit About The Bay Area
Vulgar olive loaf Donald Trump is hitting the campaign trail in California in advance of the state’s June 7 primary. A good way to appeal to your constituents is to show that you’re “one of them” by feigning nominal interest in their sports teams. If you do this, though, you should have a working se...
Whatever Happens, Anderson Varejão Is Going To Be A Dude With A Championship Ring
The Warriors are a ruthlessly efficient team run by a fiery, undersized center who will take out his anger on your dick and balls and a teeny-tiny point guard who carries himself with a non-insistent swagger, and they’re owned by a techno-libertarian pug who named his dogs after Ayn Rand characters....
An Extremely Helpful NBA Finals Preview For Basketball Morons
Hello, casual basketball viewer! The NBA Finals begin tonight, pitting LeBron James’s Cleveland Cavaliers against Ayn Rand’s Golden State Warriors in a rematch of last season’s Finals, which the Warriors won in six games. Here’s what to expect, what to look for, and what to pretend to know about eac...
The Hater’s Guide To The 2016 NBA Finals
A few years ago, when my children were very small, I lamented the fact that I had to cut a great deal of sports out of my life. This happens when you have a baby. There’s no time to watch a tetrafinal playoff game because the kid needs to be fed or taken for a stroll or put to bed or have its butt w...
Francisco Rodriguez Details Effects Of Zika Virus
Longtime closer Francisco Rodriguez, currently pitching for the Tigers, told ESPN this evening that he contracted Zika virus this offseason while he was in his native Venezuela. The 34-year-old pitcher described what happened to him while he was sick, and it sounds pretty gnarly. The most alarming e...