riots Page 91 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rex Ryan's Voicemail Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like New York Jets coach Rex Ryan, who won this weekend with one well-placed phone call. No, it wasn't to Batman....

Leodis McKelvin: "I Am Going To Do It Again"
Buffalo Bills fans learned how to deal with disappointment a long time ago, so today is just another Tuesday morning for them. When you've already lost 11 in a row to one team, No. 12 isn't such a big deal....

You May Now Commence Swooning
Summon the trumpets and cry the hosannas! Tackle football shall be played on the evening of the day following Sunday, and your beloved hero has returned to lead you home. Also, the Raiders will be involved....

Finally, The Harvard Crimson Will Get Some Media Attention
ESPNBoston is live. No, the URL does not just redirect to "Sports Guy's World." [ESPNBoston]...

Why Your Team Sacks: New England Patriots
Some people are fans of the New England Patriots. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New England Patriots. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter grou......

Tom Brady's Throwing Shoulder Will Be Fine, Says Source Within Lying-Ass Organization
This was the shoulder on which Albert Haynesworth was briefly docked Friday. "There is no need for hysteria," says a source close to the tactically dishonest Patriots, who will now list Brady as "probable (shoulder)" for all eternity. [Boston Globe]...

Chinese Basketball Fans Riot Because Player Is Too Tall
China's Dream Basketball League has a height limit—no one over 6'2" is allowed. But one oversized trickster tried to sneak his way in and basically brought the league to its knees....

Boston Stands At Attention For Patriots' Opener
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Not A Game, We Talking 'Bout Malpractice
Tebucky Jones plans to sue New England's team doctors for misdiagnosing his injuries and ending his career. The Mets' class-action suit is still collecting plaintiffs. [NESN]...

Report: Notre Dame Will Play Army At Yankee Stadium In History's Most Insufferable Football Game
Pat Forde's reporting that the Fighting Irish will take on the Black Knights in 2010 at Versailles-on-the-Harlem, reviving a longstanding New York tradition of Irish people fighting the Army that dates all the way back to the Draft Riots. [ESPN]...

Good Samaritan Gives Tom Brady His Much Needed $4,000
After hearing about the plight of an ex-con, panhandling to re-pay $4,000 to the Patriots' quarterback, a kind businessman has volunteered to pay the debt on his behalf—keeping Tom Brady blissfully unaware that anything has gone wrong....

Tom Brady Has No Pity For Panhandling Fools
Not all panhandlers are drunks and bums. Some are just convicted bank robbers who happen to owe Tom Brady — yes, that one — a good chunk of change for tucking and running away with two flower planters....

Laker Riots Go Off Without A Hitch
Store fronts smashed? Check. Car windows stomped on? Done. Shoe store looted? You betcha. Trash cans thrown at cops? Absolutely. It's not an official championship until your downtown gets roughed up a little bit, am I right, Los Angeles?...

Only Minimal Arrests? For Shame, Pittsburgh
"We have a few arrests. For the most part people are being orderly but we've got a few people who don't want to leave." C'mon, Pittsburgh. That's no way to usher in a Crosby regime. [Post-Gazette]...

Tom Brady Even Heals Better Than A Normal Person
Brady's surgeon on the quarterback's rehab: "With regard to his recovery of strength, I've never seen anything quite like it. With an average person, it would have taken probably twice as long to get range of motion and strength back." Sweet jeebus, who is this guy? Wolverine? [LA Times]...

Your Profanity-Laced Tirades Will Now Be Taken Under Advisement
So: For those of you concerned, upset, distraught, FURIOUS, over the new commenting policy there's an email box for you to send those fiery missives:[email protected]...

Jeter On The Lam After Bank Robbery, Support Of PatriotsBlue Jays
Chad Floyd Jeter is wanted by police after allegedly robbing a bank in Alabama, while wearing a New England PatriotsBlue Jays cap misidentified by Alabama police as a Patriots hat. (Who did you think I was talking about?) He is considered armed and dangerously clutch. [Wicked Good Sports]...

Hey Lama, How About A Little Something, You Know, For The Effort?
I don't know jack about Buddhism or karma or any of that noise, but I do know that the Dalai Lama wearing a Patriots hat can't be good for the natural order of things....

Tom Brady Must Be Thrilled
Hey, it's his new bride being groped by nude, muscular black men! [Arab Aquarius]...

Patriots' Day Gives Boston A Reason To Feel Special For Once
On this day, 342 years ago, a group of bloodthirsty Welsh mercenaries attacked defenseless Pilgrims with boiling tea kettles, winning the War of 1812 so that Boston could have day baseball on a Monday....