san-francisco-49ers Page 40 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
49ers' Willis Employs Five Pointed Palm Exploding Heart Technique
The big question in San Francisco right now: Should Mike Singletary be kept on as head coach next season? The overwhelming sentiment so far is yes, although Jets' wide receiver Brad Smith may not agree. If there were ever any doubt as to whether the 49ers would begin to take on Singletary's rabid pe...
Time To Party With The 49ers And Cardinals
Only a couple of hours or so until Leitch's Arizona Buzzsaw square off against my San Francisco Forty-Niners, and the big question remains: Who will be the first tonight to remove his pants inappropriately, Matt Leinart or Mike Singletary? Judging from the photo, Matt gets the presumptive nod, espec...
For The Next Four Minutes, Mike Singletary Will Be Coaching Pantless. Any Questions?
Already considered one of the great coaching meltdowns of all time, the real truth surrounding Mike Singletary's performance during and after the 49ers-Seahawks game this past Sunday is only beginning to emerge. First reported on XTRA-919 radio in Phoenix on Thursday is the news that the new SF coac...
Not Just Another Pretty Face
Hooo boy. The reporter here — I'm pretty sure — is Danyelle Sargent of Fox, making the Gaffe of the Season so far. And what makes this more sad/amusing is the fact that Sargent was involved in a controversy while at ESPN in 2006 when, thinking her mic was dead, blurted "What the fuck was that?" w...
Mike Singletary Will Surely Kill Someone Before The Year Is Out
The forecast for the San Francisco 49ers season changed dramatically on Sunday from dismal to dangerous; like the difference between a cold, monotonous drizzle and a lightening storm in the mountains. And we can thank Mike Singletary for that. Not only did the 49ers' new interim coach pull a player ...
President Condi Possible This January in San Francisco?
Condoleezza Rice, National Security Adviser to President Bush Secretary of Flippin' State (and we're rather embarrassed about THAT), has been fishing for an NFL job post-Executive Branch for awhile. She's quoted in 2002 trolling for the NFL Commissioner position (only to be beaten out by Guantanamo ...
Switching Mikes In Midstream, The 49er Way
Well, here is your new face of the San Francisco 49ers. Initial thoughts? Aside from being totally hyp-no-tized, I have to say that it really couldn't be any worse than the old one. There was perhaps no coach in the NFL one wanted to see succeed more than Mike Nolan — really, has anyone ever had a b...
Alex Smith And The Series Of Unfortunate Events
It appears that Alex Smith's time as a San Francisco 49er has come to an end. The star that shone so brightly for, say, about five-and-a-half quarters in 2006, was extinguished on Tuesday when it was learned that the quarterback has a broken bone in his shoulder and would be placed on injured reserv...
NFL Season Preview: San Francisco 49ers
The NFL season begins in earnest in about 48 hours, so it's time to finish the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous others who consider football the only sport worth watching. You will see many of these today, because we're a...
NFL News and Notes
God, it feels good to see football on television. I know it sucks watching third and fourth string scrubs scrambling around and dropping passes, but it's better than nothing. And it's only pre-season, so the fumbles, interceptions, and drops don't count. At least that's what I tell myself after my t...
Joe Montana And Matt Leinart, BFF, Or Something
It has been amusing, as we flip through the NFL season preview mags we keep buying — are they always out this early? — is that every single one of them mentions Matt Leinart's fun-loving beer bonging. As we said from the get-go, the reason those pictures took off was because they fit into an existin...
Alex Smith Is A Little Looser When South Of The Border
Didn't Alex Smith attend college in Utah, where drunkenly attempting to eat girls' faces is prohibited? (unless they're one of your wives, that is). Hey, who cares! We're in Mexico! Finally, my frequent visits to 49ersnews pay off....
Patriots First Round Draft Pick Gets Progressively Worse
Because that's pretty much all the 49ers have left to stay motivated at this point. Their record helps that pick they famously gave to New England continue to plummet. A silly little upset of Tampa Bay puts them at 5-10 and currently the Patriots pick 8th....
The Woebegone Bay Area
This has been brought up before, but in the wake of this whole Barry Bonds business, it's worth mentioning: The San Francisco bay area is going through the worst stretch of sports news in recent memory. They're like the anti-Boston....
Somebody Put The 49ers Out Of Their Misery
It seems kind of crazy, in retrospect, that anyone could have thought the 49ers were going to make some sort of leap this year. (Some idiots even picked them to win the division.) The biggest disappointment is that Mike Nolan is now looking so damned sharp for no good reason. What happened to these ...
The Dullest MNF Game Of Them All
It's not easy to come up with reasons to get excited about tonight's Monday Night Football game between the Seattle Seahawks and the San Francisco 49ers. We've been trying....
Dick Nolan, Rest In Peace
Before Ronnie Lott and Joe Montana and Jerry Rice, there was a plucky band of guys in shiny gold pants with names like John Brodie, Gene Washington and Cedrick Hardman. Many don't remember that it wasn't Bill Walsh who put the San Francisco 49ers on the map; it was Dick Nolan. He was the first coach...
The 49ers Have Many Ways To Make You Hurl
Oh 49ers, what have you gotten yourselves into now? It seems that in order for the team to acquire the land that it needs for a proposed new stadium in Santa Clara, the 49ers would have to purchase and operate the Great America Amusement Park, which is next to the site. And what's more, the team is...
Please, No More MNF Doubleheaders
We're not sure why, exactly, we feel compelled to write about a game that we spent four hours writing about last night and just ended about eight hours ago ... and, oh yeah, was completely miserable to watch. But, alas, here we are....