screamer Page 101 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Aww, Look At These Real Soccer Players Letting The Goalie Score For Once
This is quite remarkable. Not the goal itself—which West Ham’s Adrián scored in a meaningless testimonial match—but the impulse behind it....
A First-Person View Of A Cristiano Ronaldo Penalty Kick To The Face
Sarah Arcand had damned good seats for last week’s Real Madrid 4-0 win over Sevilla. A little too good. When Ronaldo sailed a penalty kick high, she managed to get her camera out of the way, but not her face....
3 Soccer Guys Try One-Upping Each Other With Horrible Gaffes; 2nd Guy Wins Easily
When you see why Quilmes’s Daniel Imperiale is all hunched over looking like he’s about to puke from embarrassment, you’ll understand how his display of complete ineptitude overshadowed the two blunders that sandwiched it. Who knew ten seconds was enough for three players in a row to shit themselves...
You Will Never Be As Good At Anything As Barcelona's 12-Year-Olds Are At Soccer
While the rest of the soccer world was getting injured on the international break, the little tots of Barcelona’s Alevin A squared off with their counterparts in Madrid for an incredibly entertaining Mini-Clasico. The Blaugranitas won 2-0 in the final of the Mediterranean International Cup, and prod...
Get A Load Of This Wondergoal Jamie Vardy Scored Against Germany
This right here is a real beauty. Nathaniel Clyne hit a perfect cross to Jamie Vardy, who did a little bit of magic to backheel it past a spinning Manuel Neuer without even looking at the damn goal. ...
Jurgen Klinsmann Blew It
The United States Men’s National Team will probably qualify for the 2018 World Cup in Russia. Yes, they are trailing Guatemala and Trinidad and Tobago in the Group C standings. Yes, they have played conservatively without the defensive ability to make that style work. A day after the U.S. got humili...
Burkina Faso’s National Team Is Playing For Liberty (And Money)
Burkina Faso hosts Uganda tomorrow at Ouagadougou’s Stade du 4 Août 1983, with qualification for the 2017 Africa Cup of Nations on the line. For members and staff of Les Étalons, though, the match represents more than just the next step in the march toward Gabon....
Harry Redknapp And Jordanian Journalist Have An Unproductive Interview
Harry Redknapp, the new (temporary?) manager of the Jordan national team, celebrated his first win in charge after his team beat Bangladesh yesterday, 8-0. More difficult than the match itself was the postgame interview, in which both ‘Arry and the unfortunate journalist tasked with speaking to him ...
Cute And Good Puppy On The Field Gets Whisked Away Like A Little Baby
Capivariano FC beat Oeste 2-1 on Wednesday in some hot Campeonato Paulista action down in Brazil, but I don’t care about that and you don’t care about. What I care about and what you presumably will care about is this here furry Idiot On The Field. A Capivirano player was eventually able to befriend...
This Dumb Keeper Is Soccer's New Trickster God
Just look at this idiot. Maritzburg United goalkeeper Glenn Verbauwhede, of the South African Premier Soccer League, has developed an incredibly crazy strategy of baiting referees into giving opponents fouls. First, he lures opposing players into his personal space, then intentionally lunges at thei...
James Rodríguez Is Out To Prove He's Still The Shit
Nobody in Madrid much likes Colombian superstar James Rodríguez. His teammates don’t like him, his coach doesn’t like him, the fans don’t like him, the president doesn’t like him, even the local cops don’t like him. At a career crossroad of sorts, with his talent unquestioned but his dedication and ...
Adam Johnson Given 6 Years In Prison For Child Sex Crimes; Bestiality Porn Charge Also Revealed
Just when it seemed like the weirdest bits of Adam Johnson’s criminal case involving his sexual relationship with a 15-year-old girl had already come out, even more emerges and the whole thing gets even stranger....
Johan Cruyff, The Man Who Invented Modern Soccer, Dies At 68
It would be impossible to even approach summing up the totality of Johan Cruyff’s unparalleled influence and contributions to the game of soccer in one blog post. First as the best player on the planet suiting up for Ajax, Barcelona, and the Dutch national team in the 1960s and 1970s, and later as a...
Soccer Player Quits Team After Learning Teammate Was Sleeping With His Wife
The man pictured above is Christian Keller, very recently the captain of Danish first-division club Randers. He and his fellow Horses had to bid adieu to one of their teammates today, after Jonas Borring announced that certain personal events had led him to decide to leave the club. What instigated ...
Gigi Buffon Pens Moving Poem To His One True Love, The Goal
There’s something about time and the slow accretion of age that turns men wistful. Even the most stoic man will shed his hardened emotional exterior, and just might see himself so moved by, say, reaching an especially poignant milestone or achievement in life that he feels the urge to memorialize hi...
Boo On Sevilla For Not Trying To Stop Messi With This Wacky Free-Kick Defense
With his nearly unlimited array of skills and his penchant for breaking down defenses even when they’re almost single-mindedly set up to stop him, Lionel Messi presents a unique threat to opponents. Unfortunately for his rivals, it’s difficult to dream up some newfangled tactic that could help bottl...
Future Superstar Matt Miazga Ready To Fight To Become "The Best American Player"
The worst you can say is that it hasn’t happened yet. This is no great shocker, since it was always going to be a long journey for Matt Miazga to go from promising MLS prospect to veritable Premier League legend. Yet it is a voyage Miazga himself is perfectly ready to start down step by step, as evi...
Belgium National Soccer Team Cancels Training After Terrorist Attacks In Brussels
In light of the terrorist bombings today targeting the Brussels Airport and a local metro station, the Belgian national team, assembled in the country’s capital ahead of an international friendly against Portugal, has canceled their scheduled training session:...
Damn, This Dude Flat Out Crushes This Ball
A lot to enjoy here: 1) the shot by Wimbledon’s Jake Reeves itself, coming off an expertly controlled bounding ball and a wallop of a kick that sends the it way up into the air before it dips and swerves into the goal; 2) Reeves’s cocky little strut that he starts right after the ball comes off his ...
Errant Lionel Messi Shot Breaks A Fan's Wrist And Leaves Her Woozy
From the look of Raquel’s careful, handrail-aided steps, the slow wipe of her mouth, her collapse into a seat, and her dazed swaying as she attempts to pick herself up afterward, you’d think that the Villarreal-Barcelona match attendee had just realized, after puking up a quart or so of alcohol, tha...