screamer Page 121 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Is This Jürgen Klinsmann-Fabian Johnson Thing Really A Thing?
For the first time in his largely stress-free tenure as USMNT manager, Jürgen Klinsmann is facing real scrutiny about his job performance. And while it hasn’t been exactly fashionable to take aim at him until now, the press and fan responses to his current dilemma are inextricably linked to their pr...
Robin van Persie Own Goal Ensures Netherlands Fail To Qualify For Euros
With the 2016 European Championships expanding from the usual 16 teams to 24, it should have been a given that the Netherlands would qualify. They finished third at last year’s World Cup, and boast a roster full of future stars and Champions League veterans. Yet going into today’s final group qualif...
Barcelona Fans Are Losing Their Minds Again
Ever heard of Barcelona’s Álex Grimaldo? No? How about Sergi Samper? That name might ring a bell for vigilant Arsenal transfer rumor watchers, but probably not most others. Even so, the fate of these two kids, who have oceans of potential that their manager seems curiously uninterested in tapping, h...
Cristiano Ronaldo Isn't The Greatest Player Alive, And That's Insane
Real Madrid’s Cristiano Ronaldo won Europe’s Golden Shoe yesterday, which recognizes the top scorer across the continent’s top leagues. It’s the fourth time he’s won the award, and it comes after last season, when he scored 48 goals in 35 La Liga games. No one else in the history of the award has wo...
Agent: Gareth Bale And Ronaldo Don't Hate Each Other (They Totally Do)
It’s long been understood that playing with Cristiano Ronaldo is not the easiest of tasks. He is a singular talent that thrives on a team built with the specific objective of facilitating him. As driven an athlete as you’ll ever find, he focuses only on winning—and to him, the path to winning starts...
Freddy Adu Is Still Alive, Actually Playing Some Pretty Good Soccer
The last time we heard from the young man—despite being (in)famous for over a decade, can you believe he’s still only 26?—formerly known as The Next Pelé, Freddy Adu had flopped out of Finland’s league and was spending his considerable free time on the nightclub hosting circuit. But Adu did make it ...
Mexico Beat The USMNT Because They're A Better Team
As we sift through the rubble of last night’s 3-2 Mexico victory over the USMNT, Jürgen Klinsmann finds himself squarely in the spotlight. The high stakes one-off is a disappointing setback for the program, and an occasion to soberly evaluate the course that Klinsmann has charted for it. The U.S. wi...
Fox Sports Humiliates America With Horrible USMNT Promo
Remember when a Mexican TV station used Donald Trump, a mass of whoopie cushions and mashed potatoes inhabited by a chaos demon, to troll the USMNT ahead of tomorrow’s game against Mexico? That was pretty good! They got us! Today, Fox tried to clap back with a promo video of its own:...
Klopp In
From the moment former Liverpool manager Brendan Rodgers was fired, Jurgen Klopp’s now-completed move to the club was an open secret. And yet it still took seeing him at that trademark new signing table, a pen-cradling hand hovering over some papers, to really believe that a true superstar manager l...
Man City Academy Kids Flee, Return, Flee Again From Nutmeg Master's Skills
The purest physical distillation of what it feels like to have your mind blown by a feat of mastery is the innate urge to turn and sprint as far away as humanly possible from the scene of said feat. These Manchester City academy players repeatedly exhibit this behavior, which in itself is evidence e...
Corrupt FIFA Executives Suspended, To Be Replaced By Corrupt FIFA Executives
As was reported yesterday, save the not-unreasonable belief that a known whitewasher would break out the paint, Sepp Blatter, Michel Platini, and Jérôme Valcke have all been suspended for 90 days by FIFA’s ethics committee....
Sepp Blatter's 90-Day Suspension Is In The Hands Of The Man Who Whitewashed FIFA Corruption
According to various reports, FIFA’s ethics committee has recommended a 90-day suspension of president Sepp Blatter while they wait to see if any of the numerous investigations of him stick. Mind you, this is only a provisional suspension which must be ratified by a man with a track record of trying...
Former FIFA Vice President Throws All Kinds Of Shit At Sepp Blatter
You know you’re in for some good dirt when Chung Mung-joon, a former FIFA vice-prez in the running for the next presidency, hits you with bars like “To call [FIFA] a mafia is almost insulting to mafia, so blatant and arrogant is its corruption.”...
Landon Donovan Says USMNT Shouldn't Take Klinsmann To The Next World Cup
The last time the public got to stick the thermometer into the Landon Donovan-Jürgen Klinsmann beef, we learned that the meat was still cooking. In a new interview, Donovan’s thoughts about Klinsmann’s shaky recent record and what that should mean for the manager’s job security show that yep, this b...
Alexis Sánchez And Mesut Özil Are Better Than Everyone
It’s telling that, as impressive as the sheer all-encompassing nature of Arsenal’s domination of Manchester United this weekend, what was even more stunning was the shock of it all....
Look! Up In The Sky! It's A Bird ... It's A Plane ... No, It's Soccer Man!
We can’t feel too bad for this Argentine soccer fan who, apparently in an effort to see if he really was Superman, lept (fell?) from the top of the stadium’s wire fence. After all, how can you truly know flying is impossible if you never try?...
Rodgers Out
Liverpool FC announced this afternoon that manager Brendan Rodgers, who has seemingly been on the hot seat for the better part of two years, has been fired. Here’s how they, rather Britishly, phrased it....
José Mourinho's Self-Regard Grows In Inverse Proportion To Chelsea's Record
Hey remember when David Moyes coached United for a year, everyone agreed it was an unmitigated disaster, and it became the standard by which to measure all EPL meltdowns? José Mourinho, the little tyrant man who will probably get fired from the USMNT someday, and Chelsea have started this season thr...
Sergio Agüero Goes Supernova, Scores 5 Goals in 20 Minutes
Manchester City were losing today’s match to Newcastle 1-0 for most of the first half until Sergio Agüero went all Robert Lewandowski and rung up five quick goals to kill the game dead in a matter of minutes. Incredibly, he did the Whole Shit with a mere nine touches. It was sudden and violent and N...
Hope Solo Will Face Domestic Violence Charges Again
The domestic violence charges against Hope Solo that were dropped earlier this year will return after a higher court in King County reversed a lower court’s decision to dismiss them. Solo had been charged with two counts of misdemeanor assault. In January, her lawyer successfully argued to a judge t...