screamer Page 126 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here's José Mourinho's Bullshit Excuse For Why He Demoted His Team Doctor
Earlier this week, José Mourinho demoted Chelsea’s long-serving team doctor, days after he publicly showed her up during a game last weekend. He’s rightly come in for criticism for the decision, so now “sources close” to him have concocted an excuse for the change: the players didn’t feel comfortabl...
Learn How To Be An FC Cincinnati Fan With These Cringeworthy Videos
Cincinnatians: congratulations on your brand spanking new soccer team, the soon-to-be USL-dwelling FC Cincinnati! You probably have questions about your new club and how you can best prove that you are the biggest, loudest, most passionate FCC fan out there, being that the team is only a few hours o...
Costa Rica Coach Paulo Wanchope Exchanges Blows With Man At U-23 Match
Costa Rica and Panama’s U-23 teams met in Panama City Tuesday night as part of qualifying for the 2016 Olympics in Rio. The match ended in a scoreless draw, and the real fireworks came after the final whistle blew. As recorded by Panamanian journalist Jhony Mosquera, that’s Costa Rican head coach Pa...
Dutch Goalie Scores Insane Backheel Stoppage Time Equalizer
One of the most fun little moments in a soccer match is a corner kick or free kick with the game almost over, and the attacking team either tied or down a goal. Their towering goalkeeper comes jogging up the field to join the fray, and the ball is pumped into the middle of literally 20 players where...
Azerbaijani Journalist Killed After Criticizing Star Player On Facebook
In the heat of the moment, I bet family members of athletes who are unfairly shit on by the local hot-take purveyors in the media have fantasized about exacting revenge. In Azerbaijan, one player’s family members took this impulse a little too far and actually killed a guy for insulting their relati...
Lionel Messi And Éver Banega Are In The Middle Of A Free-Kick Contest
Reigning Champions League champs Barcelona are taking on Europa League winners Sevilla in the UEFA Supercup right now, but that’s not the only contest being waged in Tbilisi. Éver Banega and Lionel Messi are in the midst of an impromptu free kick-off....
José Mourinho Demotes Team Doctor After Blowing Up Her Spot On Pitch
Eva Carneiro, the long-serving Chelsea first team doctor, has been a staple of the team’s matches over the years, rushing out onto the pitch as the first responder to any and all of their injuries. It’s very likely that one such attempt to treat a player on the field last weekend will be her last, h...
New York Red Bulls Fans Drop Sick Burn On NYCFC And The Rest Of MLS
Kinda hard to argue when Pirlo’s playing like this:...
Soccer Player's Butt Healed By Magic Spray
“Become a soccer physio,” they said. “It’s an easy job,” they said. “You’ll never have to coat a player’s ass in cold spray in a stadium full of people,” they said....
Sandwich Board Becomes Weapon In New Jersey Soccer Fight
The third New York Derby takes place this evening, and it got wild in New Jersey beforehand. The AP’s Rob Harris was there as a brawl popped off out front of Bello’s Bar & Grill, right across the Passaic River from Red Bull Arena. One dude even started swinging with a sandwich board:...
Leicester City Player Calls Man "Jap" At Casino, Apologizes
Leicester City are at it again. Striker Jamie Vardy was caught on camera at a Leicester casino On July 26th repeatedly calling a man “jap” because he thought he was looking over his shoulder at his cards. He has since apologized for the incident, but the club are investigating. Vardy started and sco...
League One Team Accidentally Scores, Allows Opponent To Score On Them
That’s the manager of Doncaster Rovers explaining why his team intentionally allowed a player from the opposing team to dribble down the field and score. ...
Jose Mourinho Is In Midseason Form As Chelsea Barely Survive Swansea
Chelsea opened their Premier League title defense today with a topsy turvy 2-2 draw against Swansea City. As you can see, Jose Mourinho ain’t too happy about it. Our staff of amateur lip readers concurs that he’s dropping a “Fuck off Michael!”—directed towards referee Michael Oliver—but you could ma...
The First Goal Of The Premier League Season Is ... An Own Goal
Here it is, the day we’ve all been waiting for: the return of the EPL. Manchester United-Tottenham is our opener, and though Spurs started brightly, all their good work was undone thanks to a terrible pass by Nabil Bentaleb. It wasn’t the prettiest season-christening goal, but we’ll take it....
The Best Of The Best: Our 2015-16 Premier League Preview, Pt. 3
You’ve made it to the third and final installment of our Premier League preview, and what lies below is a rundown of what we at Deadspin consider the six (6) least bad teams in all of England’s top flight. This thirdish of the league is important because this is where teams are fighting for all-impo...
The Uncomfortable Middle: Our 2015-16 Premier League Preview, Pt. 2
For the American sports fan, following soccer means a reorientation about what constitutes success. With the success of the top teams reinforced by Champions League appearances and an enhanced global profile, there is a virtuous cycle to being good that makes it even harder to break into the top. At...
Starting From The Bottom: Our 2015-16 Premier League Preview, Pt. 1
PREMIER LEAGUE BACK....
Messi Headbutt? Messi Headbutt!
I’m not sure what the evil Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa did to make the kind-hearted and benevolent Lionel Messi headbutt and throat push him, but it had to be pretty bad. Here’s the full video:...
Stun Gun-Wielding Ref Kicked In Face, KO'd By Blow To Back Of His Head
Soccer itself—and lower leagues especially—is prone to a kind of reckless, senseless violence not typically found in American sports. Toss in a heavy dose of Russians to the mix, and what is already often a caustic concoction turns downright toxic....
This Press Conference Has Mentally Scarred Pep Guardiola For Some Reason
Behold the face of a man coming to grips with the existential futility of human life, or one midway through Blood Meridian, or one forced to sit next to Rafa Benítez as he drones on after a meaningless friendly. Whatever the specific reason, this is a face of a man with no more illusions about the w...