screamer Page 140 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
![Russian Goalkeeper Takes A Flare To The Back Of His Head [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/b1vrgcsgmfyluojzwwj4.gif)
Russian Goalkeeper Takes A Flare To The Back Of His Head [UPDATE]
In today's Euro 2016 qualifier between Montenegro and Russia, a flare from the stands hit Russian keeper Igor Akinfeev in the head. Ouch. Here's another look:...
Soccer Team Gets Scored On While Busy Celebrating Their Goal
If you've ever wondered why soccer players celebrate goals in the opponent's half of the field, well it's mostly because all of them except the goalkeeper are already there. But it's also because the other team cannot kickoff while there are opposing players in their half. This is something the al...
USMNT Felled By Hat-Trick Hero Nicklas Bendtner, Who Still Sucks
For the first time this year—at least the first time we'd like to remember—a fit and strong USMNT squad got some run. The opponent was Denmark, stiff competition to be sure. So while USMNT fans could've justifiably been cautiously pleased with the 2-1 lead our boys took into the final 10 minutes of ...
Here Are Some EPL Hooligans Brawling, Because That's What They Do Best
"OY, AN' WOT 'ID I 'EAR YOU SAY ABOUT ME MUM?!" one West Ham fan presumably asked the Sunderland fan across from him. Squaring up, the Sunderland hooligan probably said, "YOU 'EARD ME, MATE. ME AN' ME LADS GAVE OL' MUMSIE A GOOD BOFFIN', BUT YOU'RE GONNA LOOK EVEN WORSE THAN THAT OL' HAG WHEN WE'AH ...
Karim Benzema's Gorgeous Pass To Ronaldo Helps Tie Up El Clasico 1-1
Karim Benzema's tiny little flick to Ronaldo is a thing of beauty because it's the kind of devilish move that makes soccer special. At first glance, it's just another back-heel. Then Ronaldo comes charging down the pitch with nothing but green and a goalkeeper in front of him and you realize, oh my ...
Here's Steven Gerrard's Final Liverpool-Man United Match In Its Entirety
Steven Gerrard made sure his final match in the Liverpool-Manchester United rivalry was a memorable one, but not in the way he'd have hoped. After coming on as a sub at halftime, he received the ball six times, played five passes, made one crunching tackle that could've gotten him a yellow, and ulti...
Exquisite Juan Mata Scissor Kick Put Man United 2-0 Up On Liverpool
In what was a fairly insane second half of today's huge Liverpool-Manchester United match, there was at least one moment of brilliance to break up the surrounding nuttiness. That was the criminally underused Juan Mata scoring his second goal of the game in acrobatic fashion....
Two Premier League Goalkeepers Had To Be Stretchered Off The Pitch
It's a dangerous day to be a goalkeeper in the English Premier League. ...
Referee Sends Off Wrong West Brom Player
Disaster struck for West Bromwich Albion just over a minute into their match against Manchester City. Wilfried Bony seized upon Gareth McAuley's poor back pass, and was subsequently hacked down by Craig Dawson. Referee Neil Swarbrick didn't immediately blow his whistle—presumably playing advantage...
FIFA Turned A Huge Profit On The World Cup, Of Course
FIFA is bad. "Bad," as in many of the people who work there are bad, and they often do bad things to the sport of soccer and to the world at large. But let no one ever say that FIFA isn't very, very good at making money: it pulled in more than $2 billion in revenues last year, nearly all of that fro...
Ref Goes Down With Injury; Soccer Player Uses Spray To Outline His Body
Hartlepool played Oxford United yesterday in England's League 2, which is not great. Midway through the second half, referee Patrick Miller collapsed, clutching his knee with what appeared to be a serious injury. Not great, either. What is great, though, is what happened next as Miller writhed on th...
Here's Your 2014-15 Champions League Quarterfinals Draw
After all the action in the Champions League's Round of 16 wrapped up on Wednesday, we now know the matchups for the quarterfinals. The loose theme here seems to be "There Will Be Rematches."...
Serie A Side Parma, $106 Million In Debt, Declared Bankrupt
Serie A side Parma, who are dead last and a sure thing to be relegated, was declared bankrupt in Italian court today, according to The Guardian. While it looks like they will finish out the Serie A season—possibly with funding from the league or Italian soccer federation—there remains the possibilit...
The USMNT Should Boycott The 2022 World Cup
Today FIFA announced that they are formally moving ahead with plans to host the 2022 World Cup in Qatar in November and December of that year, with the final being played a week before Christmas. As you may already know, Qatar's World Cup infrastructure is being built using Moses-era slavery practi...
Tim Howard Kinda Just Chills With His Hands Down, Watches Goal Go In
I know. I know. It was a great goal from Dynamo Kiev's Andriy Yarmolenko. Someone should've, could've stepped to the ball, at some point. Tim Howard probably couldn't have gotten to it anyway. I know. That's all out of the way....
Lionel Messi And Cristiano Ronaldo Find Their Final Forms
For a depressingly large group of actuarial soccer fans, this season's thrilling edition of the duel between temporally and cosmically entwined superstars Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi has mainly served as another set of cudgels to club down the other's reputation and legacy. Go deeper, becau...
Bhutan Wins Again! A Match Report From A Deadspin Reader In Bhutan
Bhutan pulled it off! The tiny landlocked Himalayan nation advanced to the second round of World Cup qualifying—where they could be placed into a pool with Asian heavyweights like Iran, Japan, or South Korea—by knocking off Sri Lanka 2-1 yesterday, winning the two-legged tie 3-1 on aggregate. The ...
Teamwork Is Helping To Hide Your Buddy's Dong While He Pees On The Bench
If you ever wanted to know how close the Sevilla players are with each other, this is your answer....
Holy Mother Carlos Tevez Just Bombed Germany With This Rocket Golazo
Juventus and Borussia Dortmund are playing today, right now. A few minutes ago, they kicked off. Then two minutes passed. Then Juventus's Carlos Tevez got the ball. Then he blew up Germany's hopes, and also Germany. No more high-quality vehicles for anyone. Because there's no more Germany. Germany's...
Olivier Giroud Is Good At Everything Except His Job
That right there is the quintessential pose of Olivier Giroud. His head tilted skyward, his face tightened into a pained grimace, his hands slowly making their way upward to his eyes or hair as he attempts to rub away the memory of whatever near-chance he was just unable to put away....