screamer Page 52 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bad Fan Beans Referee With Fountain Drink Cup
As is sadly typical of small-time soccer leagues, last night an MLS referee was on the receiving end of some physical abuse by a fan. One idiot in the stands at the Atlanta United-Minnesota United match decided to chuck their cup of water at the ref, dinging him right on the shoulder:...

The USMNT Can't Afford To Lose
The United States Men’s National Team has two games left in CONCACAF World Cup Qualifying, two games against teams that, by all accounts, the USMNT should not have any problems dispatching. Trinidad & Tobago have gotten owned more or less nonstop throughout the Hex, and Panama were lousy enough to l...

Catalonia Explodes
By now, you’ve probably seen the images on Twitter or Facebook of Spanish police in riot gear breaking a Catalan woman’s fingers, beating people as they sought medical attention, and even battling firemen. The shocking violence came as Spanish authorities tried, in vain, to block the referendum for ...

Barcelona Play In An Empty Stadium After Attempted Independence Vote
On the day of a controversial referendum on Catalonian independence, which led to the Spanish police shutting down polling stations and firing rubber bullets at a crowd of voters, Barcelona’s game against Las Palmas was closed to the public and played in an empty Camp Nou due to security concerns....

Neymar Free Kick Golazo Puts PSG Up Early
Neymar delivered a free kick golazo that put PSG up 1-0 on Bordeaux less than five minutes into the match. He followed it up moments later by setting up Edinson Cavani for a second goal. Drama? No drama here. ...

Sergio Aguero Broke A Rib In A Car Crash In Amsterdam Last Night
Superstar Manchester City striker Sergio Aguero could miss up to two months with a broken rib after a taxi he was taking in Amerstardam got into a crash last night. ESPN Sur first reported on the injury last night, and Aguero confirmed itboth the diagnosis and the circumstances this afternoon....

Bad Soccer Teams Should Stop Shooting Their Own Dicks Off By Playing From The Back
Hey, shitty teams. A humble request: How about you stop giving up the easiest goals imaginable, making enormous errors in some misguided effort to play “beautiful soccer” and build up play from the back, and instead just lump the ball forward when facing your betters? This scourge must be stopped....

Goalkeeper Gifts Arsenal A Goal With Atrocious Boner
Playing out from the back can be good. It’s great to have a goalkeeper who is good with his feet and comfortable passing the ball around with opponents zipping at him. But this kind of dicking around on the ball and giving it straight to an opponent in literally the worst area of the pitch is unforg...

Basel Player Turns Into The Flash, Jets Down Entire Length Of Pitch And Scores
I don’t know much about Dimitri Oberlin other than he is a forward who plays for Basel and he has the kind of unlimited stamina and electric speed that can only be compared to superheroes. Here he is demonstrating this with a jaw-dropping run in yesterday’s Champions League match against Benfica:...

Big-Shot Batshuayi Does It Again For Chelsea
Michy Batshuayi has never been Chelsea’s best striker in his year-plus of service for the Blues, but he’s been there when they’ve truly needed a goal, and he was able to cement an eternal place in club history when he scored the goal that won the Premier League last year....

Neymar Ignores Edinson Cavani During Goal Celebration, But I'm Sure It's Totally Fine
PSG beat Bayern Munich by a score of 3-0 in the Champions League today. Edinson Cavani scored his team’s second goal after being set up nicely by Kylian Mbappé. Here is video of that goal, which you should watch for the goal’s coolness and for Cavani’s demonstrated happiness after he scores, but you...

Check Out This Romanian Soccer Dude's Boomerang-Curved Golazo
The only way Claudiu Bumba, winger for Romania’s Concordia Chianjna, was going to overcome the terrible angle and distance from which he decided to pop a shot in today’s match against Dinamo București was if he put a truly insane amount of curl on the ball to get it to fly into the far corner. Which...

Sheffield Wednesday Manager Smashes Money To Prove His Team Doesn't Suck
Carlos Carvalhal, the manager of underachieving English second-tier club Sheffield Wednesday, faced some tough questions from the media following a 4-2 defeat to crosstown rivals Sheffield United. Rather than answer simply with words, a testy Carvalhal pulled out a 20-pound note and gave reporters a...

Soccer Fan Makes The Most Of Ceremonial First Kick
A Marseille fan slated to take the honorary first kick before the club’s Ligue 1 match against Toulouse on Sunday seized his chance and literally ran with it. The fan, Kamel Zaroual, faked like he was going to tap the ball to one of his temporary teammates, then spun around and sprinted in the oppos...

All Soccer In Uruguay Suspended After Refs Savagely Beaten During Youth Match
This past Saturday, towards the end of a U-19 match between Uruguayan clubs Platense and Basáñez, two referees were attacked by a group of around 20 spectators and players. In response to this act of violence and others like it, the Uruguayan soccer federation decided to suspend all play throughout ...

Manchester City's Goal-Scorers Are Abundant And Ruthless
When you bring Pep Guardiola in to manage your team and give him roughly one hundred thousand trillion pounds to buy practically an entire new squad, you expect trophies and pretty play and goals. Like so many goals you can’t remember all the goals. Such a steady diet of goals and only goals that yo...

Oumar Niasse, Everton's Outcast, May Have Saved His Manager's Skin
Everton manager Ronald Koeman has his team all fucked up. Going into this weekend’s game against Bournemouth, his squad had lost its last three league games by a combined score of 9-0. They were headed for another loss on Saturday, until Oumar Niasse, the man who was eagerly thrown out into the cold...

Sparta Rotterdam Keeper Saves Deluge Of Point-Blank Shots By Morphing Into Spider-Man
Soccer highlights generally depict the cool things players do to beat goalkeepers en route to scoring, but sometimes it’s the goalkeeper himself who plays the hero and earns himself immortalization in the form of a breathlessly titled Youtube video. No keeper deserves this treatment more than Sparta...

Álvaro Morata Gives A Master Class In Finishing
Chelsea striker Álvaro Morata notched a hat trick in the Blues’ 4-0 dismantling of Stoke City yesterday, continuing to prove why he was one of the most sought-after signings of the summer. Morata’s goals at the Britannia Stadium weren’t stunners, but each was a beautiful showcase of skill and finess...

Leroy Sané Opens Scoring Against Crystal Palace With Volley Off Defender's Head
Two weeks ago, we pled with Manchester City to free Leroy Sané. The Belgian was certainly liberated today as he provided his side a 1-0 lead on Crystal Palace with a marvelous demonstration of ball control—with a little help from the defender’s head....