screamer Page 75 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Former MLSer Quit Team To Be With His Cancer-Stricken Dog
As fans and followers exclusively of high-quality soccer, no one here at Deadspin picked up on the somewhat curious case involving the wonderfully nicknamed MLS player Juan Manuel “Burrito” Martínez and his mutually terminated contract with Real Lago Salado. Reported then only as a “personal issue” ...

Tiny Island Nation Caught Creating Fake Birth Certificates For Brazilian-Born Players
East Timor is a small nation occupying the eastern half of the island Timor, which is a few hundred miles north of the Australian mainland. The island was a Portuguese then Indonesian colony until 1999, when they achieved independence. Just over 1 million people live there, and it took their nationa...

Soccer Match Interrupted By Jolly Pup, Imperious Cat
A soccer match between Pachuca and Jaguares in Liga MX was briefly and adorably interrupted by a happy-go-lucky doggie that just wanted to enjoy an open expanse of grass. What a good dog!...

David Moyes To Sunderland Fans: Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Enter Here
Sunderland are in trouble. The squad is bad, the team is broke, and the man overseeing it all, once-heralded and now cosmically beleaguered manager David Moyes, can’t muster the will to even feign optimism....

Soccer Guy Gets A Goal, A Fiancée, And A Yellow Card All In One Sequence
We can now place public proclamations of everlasting love alongside ugly tackles, bare-chested celebrations, and diving as things that are against the rules in soccer....

Jermaine Jones Calls Tim Howard's Comments On USMNT Dual Nationals "Dangerous Stuff"
On Tuesday, USMNT goalkeeper Tim Howard questioned the passion of his dual-national teammates, in part blaming them and their lack of American-ness for the USMNT’s recent string of poor results. He tried walking back those comments by citing the strong play of dual-national teammates Jermaine Jones ...

Tim Howard Also Has Bad Takes On Foreign-Born USMNT Players (UPDATE)
USA Today got ahold of Tim Howard, and for some reason he decided to criticize a number of his United States Men’s National Team teammates as lacking sufficient passion for their country:...

What FIFA And The Cameroon National Team Are Doing To Joël Matip Is A Travesty<em></em>
Sepp Blatter may have been ousted from the corrupt and labyrinthine bureaucracy he constructed out of the billions of dollars that FIFA funnels in from the world’s love of soccer, but lest you worry that the organization isn’t as perplexingly, exasperatingly stupid as before, we have the case of Liv...

British Police Have Identified Over 500 Potential Victims Of Sexual Abuse In Soccer
Britain’s National Police Chiefs’ Council has released an update on the widespread investigation into sexual abuse in British soccer and the numbers are staggering. According to the NPCC, there are:...

Come Now Tottenham To Challenge For The League
Spurs have been here before....

Sevilla End Real Madrid's 40 Game Unbeaten Run With Two Late Goals
Real Madrid hadn’t lost since an April Champions League match against Wolfsburg, winning or drawing 40 games in a row to set the record for longest unbeaten streak in Spanish soccer history. But that ended at the Estadio Ramón Sánchez-Pizjuán in Seville this evening, as Sevilla stormed back from a 1...

Everton Rout Manchester City 4-0
Manchester City went to Goodison Park today and got drubbed, as Everton put four past Pep Guardiola’s side. It was the type of match that will embolden critics of Guardiola’s style, as City controlled 71 percent of the possession and had twice as many shots as Everton, but lacked a cutting edge. ...

<i>FIFA</i> Player Concedes Just The Dumbest Goal
Once I was playing the FIFA 17 demo and I somehow managed to score an own goal while trying to do a goal kick. That self-own pales in comparison to the goalmouth-scrambler conceded by Reddit user redz615 yesterday. Please enjoy the cinematic sendup that this dumb goal truly deserves....

Reports: Diego Costa Dropped From Lineup, Told To Take His Ass To China
Current Premier League leaders Chelsea are headed to Leicester to play the defending champions this weekend, but they’ll reportedly do so without leading scorer Diego Costa. Things were going so well for Costa just a week ago, but according to a series of reports, Costa and manager Antonio Conte did...

Sorry, Thomas Müller Can't Talk Right Now
Unfortunately, German soccer star Thomas Müller cannot answer any of your questions at this time. As you can see, he is on a very important phone call:...

Dimitri Payet Doesn't Want To Play For West Ham Anymore
Last season was West Ham’s best since the founding of the Premier League, as they finished seventh and qualified for the Europa League. Their talisman was attacking midfielder Dimitri Payet, who led the team with 12 goals and 14 assists in all competitions. Payet capped his year with a starring turn...

The World Cup Is Probably Expanding To 48 Teams, But That Might Be Okay
The docket at the FIFA governing council’s meeting tomorrow morning in Zurich includes the following items: “Approval of the Media and Marketing Regulations for the FIFA Beach Soccer World Cup Bahamas 2017”; “Monitoring Committee Israel-Palestine”; as well as “Format of the 2026 FIFA World Cup.”...

I Can't Stop Watching This Soccer Teen Destroy His Defender<em></em>
The name of the guy with the ball is Riccardo Orsolini, a 19-year-old who plays for Ascoli in Italy’s Serie B, and is supposedly on his way to Juventus. The name of the guy falling over doesn’t matter, because he has departed from this earth. He’s dead. RIP....

Aaron Ramsey Golazo Draws Arsenal Even
Aaron Ramsey helped wake up a pathetic-looking Arsenal early in the second half of the Gunners’ FA Cup match at Preston North End with this rocket golazo from just outside the box that left keeper Chris Maxwell hopeless. Credit, too, to Alex Iwobi’s heroism in holding onto the ball despite defenders...

Bad Soccer Teen Cut For Savage Tweets To Premier League Player
Alfie Barker, the 19-year-old striker who before today played in England’s 10th division, watched yesterday’s Bournemouth-Arsenal match and had some thoughts. He was none too impressed with Bournemouth giving up a three-goal lead in the eventual 3-3 draw. And so he sent these tweets to Harry Arter, ...