seattle Page 52 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Chone Figgins Is Bad At Cheating, Too
Let's start with the good: Chone Figgins was on base! Twice, actually! In a rare start, he went 0-1 with two walks, lowering his average to .185. Look, that's as much "good" as you're going to get. As put by Lookout Landing, who's also responsible for this wonderful gif,...

Steve Zakuani Returns To Action 15 Months After Gruesome Injury, Embraces The Man Who Pulverized His Leg
Sounders winger Steve Zakuani wondered if he'd ever play soccer again in the months after a brutal sliding tackle from Colorado midfielder Brian Mullan in April 2011 snapped both lower bones in his right leg. (Here's video of that incident, for those of you with strong and empty stomachs.) More t...

Gary Payton Has A Message For Seattle: "It's Not Our Team Anymore, Let's Move On"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Payton says he'll do all he can to bring a new team to Seattle....

Kevin Millwood (And Five Other Guys) No-Hit The Dodgers
The Mariners appear to be slowly coming around to this whole "offensive" part of baseball. They just abused the Rangers to the tune of 31 runs in two games about a week and a half ago and they are just above league average in runs scored. The boys in dark cyan still have some work to do, though—the...

Pacific Northwest Newspaper Headline Sums Up Entire Region's Feelings: "Sonics Advance To Finals, Oh Wait"
At first glance, it looks like some copy editor is trolling Sonics fans on the sports front of the Tri-City Herald in Kennewick, Wash. But then you get to that subhead, and the intention becomes perfectly obvious. It's been four years since the Sonics packed up and left for the Great Plains, and it'...

Hawk Harrelson Has "Sacks Packed With Seamen"
We received several tips about this and considered it to be sort of juvenile. Yes, yes, Hawk Harrelson said "seamen" and it sounds like "semen" and his "sacks are full of them." But then we actually watched our footage and started laughing. Maybe that makes us juvenile, who knows, but it's pretty ...

Property Owners Suing Kellen Winslow Jr. For Leaving Behind Shit-Stained House With $133,000 In Damages
Kellen Winslow Jr. is basically a deadbeat tenant, according to a lawsuit recently filed by property owners of a luxury home he rented for six months last year in Rancho Santa Fe, Calif....

Seriously, Nobody Wants To Do <i>Hard Knocks</i>
Not that this latest refusal should bum you out: a show should be canceled before it forces you to watch the Seahawks. But Seattle, when approached by HBO producers, said they're not interested in doing this year's edition of the reality show. Add them to the list of "nos" that includes the Broncos,...

Felix Hernandez And Adrian Beltre Spent Last Night's Game Talking Trash
Hernandez and Beltre were teammates in Seattle for five years, and became fast friends. So from the moment Beltre ran to first after a seeing-eye single in the second, to when he was retired on a flyout in the sixth, the two did nothing but jaw at each other good-naturedly. See? It’s just a game! Ma...

Shawn Kemp Does Shakespeare
Yes, that's Kemp and Seattle Times columnist Steve Kelley doing a scene from The Taming of the Shrew. The performance was part of a recent fundraiser for the Seattle Shakespeare Company. Kemp gave a stilted reading of his lines the whole way through, but he ad-libbed the last one, and The Bard him...

Pete Carroll On Junior Seau's Life After Football: "He Wanted To Play Forever"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Junior Seau, according to another member of the USC fraternity....

Fredy Montero's Long-Range Strike Is A Worthy Response To Yesterday's Cissé Golazo
We brought you a highlight yesterday of what's probably the best goal scored in European soccer this season, and it was almost as if a reply that Major League Soccer brought its own "you can only do that in a video game" highlight stateside last evening. Fitting, then, that it was Fredy Montero of...

Howard Schultz Gave Out $3.50 Starbucks Gift Cards: An Insider's Notes On The Shabby Death Of The Seattle SuperSonics
For those fans who believe that the only acceptable NBA champion is any team that's not the Miami Heat, the tempting choice is Oklahoma City. The Thunder have Kevin Durant's superlative set of skills, Russell Westbrook's freakish athleticism, and James Harden's 1840s prospector's beard. They are you...

New Seattle Seahawk Bobby Wagner Was In The Shitter When He Was Drafted
In one of the more appropriate instances of places to find out you got drafted by the Seattle Seahawks, Utah State linebacker Bobby Wagner learned the news while he was in the bathroom. Wagner was interrupted, but full of joy nonetheless....

Russell Wilson's Wife Provides Us With Our Favorite Face Of The Draft
Seattle chose quarterback Russell Wilson in the third round of last night's NFL Draft, and his wife of three months was so excited she immediately began the metamorphosis to boa constrictor....

The Entire Kingdome Visitors' Dugout Is Available On eBay
If you have $7,500 burning a hole in your pocket, 80 uninterrupted feet of unused wall space, and a wife you're not that attached to, this might be the perfect eBay auction for you. The original Kingdome visitors' dugout is up for sale, for anyone who wants to sit in the assprints of all the great M...

Clearly, Steroids Are Still A Problem In Major League Baseball
Witness the physique of the hero known only as The Mighty K.C., who terrorizes the children who can be found amongst the 100, 200, 300, 400, 500, or 600 fans who are just there, there, at Safeco Field; having done his work, he heads off into the great unknown....

AWOL Army Soldier Accused Of Stealing Identity Of Seahawks And Trail Blazers Owner Paul Allen
Brandon Lee Price was listed as AWOL from the U.S. Army. He was wanted for being a deserter. He needed money. So he did what he could: He attempted to steal the identity of one of the wealthiest men on the planet. The FBI says Price changed the address on a bank account belonging to Paul Allen, the ...

Marshawn Lynch Will Star Alongside Gary Busey And Lee Majors In Cowboy-Themed Movie
The Pacific Northwest is a weird place. We stay away from Portlandia and the like because we know there are strange happenings afoot....

Matt Flynn Chose Seattle Over Miami Because The Seahawks Are "Led By The Right Type Of People"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Flynn says he's not guaranteed to start in Seattle, but come on....