si Page 959 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Who Wants To Sound Like Mutumbo?
By the way, there's all kinds of Rockets video goodness on the series of tubes today....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after fooling soccer players into thinking you starred in Ghost Rider ... • Arena Football League: Los Angeles at Arizona (11 p.m., ET). The only pro football team in Los Angeles would appreciate your support. [ESPN2] • College men's basketball: Colonial Athletic Association championsh...


Man's Gotta Have A Code
It's a non-selective Sunday without a great deal of intriguing matchups (sorry those looking for an Avalanche-Stars breakdown), so my attention turns to the grand finale of what has been hailed by a great many pundits as the Greatest TV Show of All-Time. I'm not qualified to make that judgment, but ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your significant other runs down some time on the shot clock ... • Boxing: Featherweights, champion Thomas Mashaba vs. Cristobal Cruz, for the IBO title, at Mashantucket, Conn. (9 p.m., ET). Much more entertaining if you play along with your Wii. Body blow! [ESPN2] • Motor sports: M...

This Is What It Sounds Like When A Franchise Dies
We missed Bill Simmons' impassioned work for Sonics fans while we were on vacation, but it's really pretty excellent stuff, and exactly what a national sports columnist should be doing with his platform. Not that anyone will notice, or do anything, or care....

Who Do You Accept As Your Personal Puck Messiah?
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while realizing that the deadlocked Democrats are going to have to turn to Al Gore, and that this was his evil plan all along ... • College basketball: The Big Ten standings are in chaos! Ohio State 80, Purdue 77. • NHL: Sidney's back! Penguins 2, Lightning 0. • NBA: Why doesn't Pau ...

Isiah Thomas Joins "Fire Isiah" Movement
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who thinks Isiah has been trying to get fired for years - I mean, would you want to coach the Knicks? Didn't think so. When he's not trying to make sense of Isiah's substitution patterns, he can be found scrapbooking at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • Okay, seriousl...

The Best Sporting Event You've Ever Ignored
You might have missed it over the weekend (what with all the Grapefruit League action), but Israel Vázquez and Rafael Márquez got together for the rubber-match of their epic trilogy and the result was nothing short of astounding. Boxing fans everywhere settled in on Saturday night for what we knew w...

Yankees-Red Sox Feud Reaches Depths Of A Free Hat
If you haven't been paying attention to Hank "Raul Castro" Steinbrenner's words about the Red Sox in the last few days, congratulations! You're officially aware of the 28 other teams of the league....

Big Ten Pets Are Ready For March Madness/Snausages
Poor Cuddles. Ever since Kelvin Sampson left Indiana, he has refused to leave his bucket. And as the NCAA Tournament approaches, I think we can all identify ... obsessing over our own team's weaknesses; sitting as we are in our own metaphorical buckets of regret. Except that I'm wearing mine on my h...

Barry Bonds Is Not A Good Influence On Terrell Owens
Here's video from TMZ of Barry Bonds and Terrell Owens partying it up in Vegas. I'm not sure what the green liquid is — TMZ says it's absinthe — but it's clear that Owens is not a fan. This is exactly how I imagined a night out with Bonds would go. "Here, drink this! Don't worry about what's in it; ...

Derek Anderson Leaves Browns For Free Agency, Signs With Browns
I'm picturing the scene from Meet The Parents where a dejected Ben Stiller stands in an empty terminal and must wait his turn to board the airplane, thanks to the by-the-book airline employee who has yet to call his row. "Please step aside, sir."...

Kevin Borseth Is Quite Passionate About Offensive Rebounding
You may not care about women’s basketball, but don’t say that around Michigan coach Kevin Borseth. He’s, um, into the game. And as you may have picked up from this clip, he thinks that offensive rebounding is rather important. Not sure if he’s ranting at his players or at the officiating here, but e...

Stephon Marbury Should Be A Professional Prognosticator
It's particularly amusing in the wake of the great Zach Randolph "possession." How young we were back in July 2007 ... how little we knew!...

Isiah Thomas' Knicks Legacy, Summed Up In One Possession
You might have seen this already, but honestly: We've yet to see one play encapsulate a team's season more accurately than this Zach Randolph "possession" right here....

When You're Too Slow To Avoid The Zamboni
No, don't worry: A Pittsburgh Penguin did not get crushed on the ice. It's just what happens when a Zamboni's transmission fails, as reported by reader War Penguin, who was on the scene in Pittsburgh in its game against the San Jose Sharks. More action photos after the jump....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to finds its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

About Last Night
What you missed while listing all the stuff that white people like ... • NBA: New Kids On The Block ... who are those guys? Cleveland 109, Memphis 89. • College basketball: On Wisconsin ... Badgers relax atop Big Ten standings. • NFL: The Vikings can get into trouble on dry land too....