si Page 975 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
ESPN Fills Badly Needed Smart-Alecky Middle-Aged White Guy Quota
A couple days ago, Boss casually wondered how Rick Reilly would handle working alongside Dan Patrick at Sports Illustrated. I suppose taking his old job is the logical reaction....
Isiah Thomas Remains A Genius
This is a few days old, but we can't let it pass unremarked. It appears Isiah Thomas has the same firm grasp of his roster as he always has....
Live Blogging The Torre Press Conference
In a perfect, imaginary universe, Joe Torre would just go off today. His press conference, which is starting any minute now, will most likely feature Torre looking bemused and tired, giving "his side" of the story....
Two Pair Not A Winning Hand In Kansas
Oh yes we've got trouble! Right here in Salina Kansas! With a capital T and that rhymes with B and that stands for boobs! Here are Salina Central High seniors Jessica Sheahon and Haley Wenthe, modeling salacious T-shirt designs which have been banned from their high school campus. The entire notion ...
Jerry Jones Can't Figure Out This Damn Spacebar
Via Touchdown.org comes one of the more amusing attempts by a professional sports franchise to master the series of tubes that is the Internets....
This Ain't Over
Don't be confused everyone, it's me, Unsilent Majority. I'm filling in tonight because Will was delayed in his travels or he just doesn't love you anymore...the text message wasn't entirely clear on that matter....
ESPN Anchors Feel The Burn
You know, we always imagined that Richard Simmons just hung out in Bristol all the time, sort of an unofficial mascot. We imagine him fetching Nachos for Van Pelt and really getting on Trey Wingo's nerves....
Dan Patrick Finds Place To Peddle His Wares
We know you've been dying to find out the next move for Dan Patrick. He's got his national radio show now, his Web site and, hopefully, more Applebee's commercials with barbecue sauce all over himself. (Or whatever crappy chain restaurant that was; they all blend into one for us.) Well, Patrick has ...
When Assimilation Goes Wrong: Negro NASCAR
You may remember The Assimilated Negro from his Negro Bowl I coverage for us last year. He returns to us to discuss NASCAR's odd decision to try to Negro-ize their sport....
Derek Jeter > Daniel LaRusso?
Yesterday's Derek Jeter post got me a little nostalgic for the greatest teenage karate movie ever made, and I wasn't really sure why. Until just now....
Witness Bill Simmons In Tight Tight Tights
The E-Ticket section on ESPN.com has always been one of the stronger elements of the site, and the show, while occasionally lapsing into the same soft-focus weeper segments that permeate Chris Connelly's "reports," trades off it well. Jeremy Schaap's Cecil Fielder story was fascinating; it was hard ...
David Boston Will Attack You With Comfortable Pillows
Poor David Boston. A Pro Bowl receiver with the Cardinals in 2001, he's dogged by injuries and bounces around to three other teams, tests positive for steroids, then is nabbed for DUI. And now the worst of all misdeeds: Domestic cushion assault....
The Journalists Is Smart And Diligent
How absurd has the the Kobe Bryant story become? There was a rather large media kerfuffle at Lakers practice yesterday revolving around whether or not Kobe had cleaned out his locker. It turned out that he hadn't cleaned out his locker; he had merely cleaned it. Say what you will about the status of...
It's True: The Red Sox Have Become The Yankees
The kewpie doll this morning goes to commenters Chad Sexington (who provided us with this wonderfully ironic photo (and this animated GIF) and, especially, Fiddling While Jim Rome Burns, who came up with a theory that just might explain what's happening to the Red Sox right now. He calls it The Keki...
About Last Night
What you missed while taking care of business, Scarlet Knights style ... • MLB: Manny flap helps Byrd, Indians to 3-1 ALCS lead. • NHL: No, Anze Kopitar is the real Purple Jesus! Kings 4, Wild 3. • NBA: Another day, another exhibition game flagrant foul ejection....
To Watch Tonight
Forget it, nothing will wipe this from your mind ... • MLB: American League Championship Series, Game 3, Boston at Cleveland [Fox]; National League Championship Series, Game 4, Arizona at Colorado [TBS]. Man, is Jesus going to be peeved when the Diamondbacks come back and win this thing. • NFL: N.Y....
Kelvin Sampson Is At It Again
Forgive us a moment of Illini "outrage" here, but Indiana coach Kelvin Sampson, the guy who bolted Oklahoma after making improper phone calls to recruits that ended up putting the school on probation, is at it again in Bloomington....
Quincy Carter Hits Bottom Again
Once again our Arena League II fantasy team has been thrown into disarray with the news that Quincy Carter has been arrested on drug-related charges. As you know, Carter most recently played for the AFL's minor league Bossier-Shreveport Battle Wings, but now resides in the Caddo Correctional Center ...