smu Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Brad Ausmus Melts Down, Curses Out Ump, Claims Home Plate With His Sweater
The Tigers were up 8-0 on the Twins after the first inning, and they’ve spent the next seven inning melting down and letting them tie it up. After Nick Castellanos struck out in the fourth inning, Tigers manager Brad Ausmus went straight at home plate umpire Doug Eddings and got tossed after very gr...

Rivalry Match In Brazil Ends In Massive Brawl, Sending 5 Fans To Hospital
The gruesome stomping out you see above was just one instance of fan violence that occurred during this weekend’s CSA vs. CRB rivalry match. After the game ended 0-1 in favor of CRB, which won them the local state championship at stake, dozens of opposing fans streamed onto the pitch and started fig...

A Young Parent’s Guide To Raffi
The day starts well enough: no hangover, no fighting before bedtime, no crying from the nursery, no staring through the darkness at indeterminate hours wondering in what direction, if any, my life is headed....

Thomas Müller Scored Himself A Clean Little Half-Bicycle Kick Goal
Thomas Müller has, apparently, been reading the pamphlets and watching the tapes. The move in 2016, it seems, is knocking the ball down to yourself and spinning about while scoring. Christine Sinclair did it. Dele Alli did it. And it wasn’t as pretty as the Canadian or the Englishman, but Thomas Mül...

Memphis: "Don't Stop Me Now!" SMU: "OK."
Memphis is beating SMU 56-0 at the half, thanks to seven Paxton Lynch touchdown passes. He’s coming soon to a bad NFL team near you!...

SMU Basketball Banned From Postseason, Head Coach Larry Brown Suspended Nine Games
The NCAA just hit the Southern Methodist University men’s basketball program with some heavy sanctions, including a one-year postseason ban, scholarship reductions, vacation of wins, and a nine-game suspension for head coach Larry Brown. This is all happening because an NCAA investigation revealed t...

Insert Jokes Here
We’re leaving this one up to the commenters. Do your best!...

Manchester United Still Don't Realize They're Not Manchester United Anymore
It’s kind of cute, if in a sad sort of way. Manchester United, once the biggest name in the game, chasing after superstars in the press like a giddy child racing after lightning bugs in the night, hoping to nab one or two like the big clubs can but knowing deep down that it won’t actually happen....

Why Does This World-Famous Conservationist Keep Shooting Animals?
Last week, the Daily Mail ran a story about a financier who had given up big-game hunting for conservation....

Craig James Sues Fox Sports For Religious Discrimination
Befitting a man who espoused homophobic beliefs during a failed Senate run, believes himself to be Christian martyr, and has been dogged by allegations that he killed five hookers while at SMU, Craig James sued Fox Sports on Monday for religious discrimination, alleging that he was fired because of ...


Brad Ausmus Has His Ned Yost Moment
It’s been a disappointing season for the Detroit Tigers, who won 90 games last year and expected to be a playoff team again this season. After blowing a late lead and losing 11-9 to the Mariners last night, the Tigers’ record sits at 46-47, and there is talk about the team unloading talent at the tr...

Here's Our Favorite New Low-Alcohol Beer
Earlier this week, an employee of Colorado’s Caution Brewing Company threw his job to the wind via an angry and profane letter to Evil Twin Brewing in which he chastised the Brooklyn-based contract brewer for their high prices. Evil Twin posted the letter on their Facebook page, prompting Caution’s ...

Thomas Müller Scores Goal From Seemingly Impossible Angle
Despite being ridiculously shorthanded, Bayern Munich is having its way with Frankfurt today with the most impressive effort coming from Thomas Müller, who played what looks like an almost impossible angle for Bayern’s third goal. ...

SMU Just Got Boned Out Of The Tournament By A Bullshit Goaltending Call
SMU just lost a heartbreaker to UCLA, and holy shit, are they going to have a hard time swallowing this one....

If You Have A Heart, Pull For SMU
You can say a lot of things about Southern Methodist University: lots of spoiled kids go there, it has the George W. Bush library and is proud of it, that whole death penalty thing, etc. etc. and then some. But for me, it is of some great personal significance that they're even playing in the NCAA t...

Bobby Knight Requests You Sit The Hell Down
"Hey, boys! Have a seat! Have a seat!"...

Mad Genius Attempts To Smuggle So Many Damn Beers Into Soccer Game
I don't know how much beer costs at a Turkish soccer game, but I imagine the prices are just as exorbitant as they are here, and so I sympathize with this man's desire to sneak his own aclohol into the stadium. I admire his ingenuity as well, as it is no small feat to design an outfit that can conce...

Here's An Underrated IPA From A Properly Rated State
New Hampshire is often overlooked by my fellow Massachusettsian beer-drinkers and life-lovers, and this is a shame. All we tend to know about the Granite (or Marble?) State is that there's no sales tax but high property tax (or perhaps vice versa), and it's got either a nice, long coastline or, if t...

Report: Kickboxer Died After Bout Due To Cheap Promoter, Inept Doctors
The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel went long this weekend on the death of Dennis Munson, a 24-year-old kickboxer who in March collapsed in the ring following his first amateur bout and died hours later. It's a harrowing read that catalogues a litany of errors that started well before the fight and ...