soccer Page 234 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Radio Broadcaster Who Looks Freakishly Like Tim Howard Bumps Into Tim Howard
According to Greg Matzek, Milwaukee-area radio personality on 620-WTMJ (an appropriate call sign, given most talk radio folks' penchant for gratuitous gab), he's been told hundreds of times that he looks like Tim Howard. He says he was confused for Tim Howard on the red carpet at the 2007 ESPYs—we b...

Sports Media Celebrate Equality By Accusing Hope Solo And The USWNT Of Choking In World Cup Final
The U.S. women lost in the World Cup final to Japan on Sunday in Frankfurt after relinquishing leads in the waning moments of both regulation and overtime, then whiffing on its first three penalty kicks, the second of which went soaring off toward Lower Bavaria. In reductive, knee-jerk sportsworld...

UAE Soccer Player May Be Punished For "Disrespectful"-But-Also-Awesome Backheel Penalty Kick
On Sunday, Theyab Awana, a 21-year-old winger with the United Arab Emirates national team, scored on a penalty kick in a friendly against Lebanon. Only he did it off of a 180 and using his heel. UAE was up 5-2 at the time, and they ultimately won 7-2, so the stakes weren't very high for either tea...

Why Everyone Wants To Marry Hope Solo
A lot of people think Hope Solo is hot, statistically speaking. That's not surprising. What is unusual is how little her perceived hotness seems to matter to those people. There seems to be less of a desire to see her in a bikini, and the fact that people find her attractive is manifesting itself i...

The Women's World Cup Final Totally Kicked The Royal Wedding's Ass In Tweets
Because one would never want to rely merely on television ratings to assess the popularity of women's sports, one must do the next best thing when one is a member of a generation of navel-gazing tech addicts: use Twitter! Oh, hooray. What ever would we do without Twitter? What ever would we do witho...

Watch The Gut-Churning End To The Women's World Cup
The U.S. women's national team's run came to an end today in Frankfurt. Here's Abby Wambach's go-ahead goal in extra time, Homare Sawa's nifty conversion off of a corner kick soon after to tie it up, and — for the U.S. and for me, at least — the heartbreaking end in penalty kicks. I still advocate...

And Here's The Japan Goal That Sent The World Cup Final To Extra Time
The US was sloppy in front of its own net, and this is what happens, from the handy foot of Aya Miyama. Why can't we have nice defenders?...

Here's The Alex Morgan Goal That Looked Like It Was Going To Win The World Cup
This game has been stressful to watch. After an uneventful first half, in which the Americans hit every part of the goalposts but couldn't find the back of the net, Alex Morgan finally capitalized on this beautiful goal. Japan tied it up a few minutes later. If you're not watching now — and if you...

Watch: Abby Wambach Is Much, Much, Much Tougher Than You Are
Tipster Catherine has alerted us to this video, which is an irritatingly scored ten-minute highlight video from Mexico's upset of the USA in a World Cup qualifier last year. But buried within that video is the highlight we've cut for you above, and we took the electro-crap out of it too....

Now You Can Watch US Women's Coach Pia Sundhage Sing Her Groovy Tunes
We ran a short item this morning on the musical stylings of Pia Sundhage, coach of the US Women's National Team. She sings to keep her players in line. We're told Joe Paterno does the same thing with Tony Bennett standards....

Five North Koreans Tested Positive For Steroids Because They Were Struck By Lightning, Says North Korea
We suspected all along that the DPRK's women's World Cup team would provide us with moments of unintentional comedy, but they've outdone themselves....

Science! Proves That No One Thought Hope Solo Was Hot Until She Went Brunette
Goalkeeper Hope Solo has adopted the Brandi Chastain USWNT Sex Symbol endowed chair, and our friends at KCKRS have decided to give this thing the data-driven treatment it deserves....

The US Women's Coach, Who Is Swedish, Fires Her Team Up By Occasionally Breaking Into Soft-Rock Song
Neither Hope Solo's ravishing skin nor disappearing nipple has carried the US Women's National Team to one game of the women's World Cup. Rather, the team can credit the musical stylings of its head coach, Pia Sundhage. She sings. And even though she's Swedish, she knows more than Cardigans and Ace ...

Today In Great Ledes
"Sports historians will look back on what happened at ESPN's ESPY awards the other night and pinpoint it as the broadcast that signaled the rise of soccer and the death of football." [Chicago Tribune]...

Soccer Analysts Find Many, Many Ways To Call The Japanese Short
On Sunday, the US Women take on Japan in the Women's World Cup Final. It will be a "tall order" for the Japanese, who have a "height disadvantage." Nay, a "major size disadvantage." The "small Japanese" will "lack height" against the Americans. But despite a match pitting "the smaller Japanese again...

So Long, Patrick Vieira. You'll Always Be "The Big Sausage" To Arsenal Fans
Patrick Vieira retired yesterday. This is sad. Vieira was one of the best midfielders ever, an end-to-end hard man who won a 1998 World Cup and a 2000 European Championship trophy with France and anchored Arsenal during three Premier League championship campaigns, including the 2003-04 "Invincible" ...

Hope Solo Headlines Spring Eternal
Hope Solo and her teammates will play in the Women's World Cup final on Sunday afternoon — largely thanks to Solo's heroics in goal. The worst things to come out of this very exciting thing, though, are the headlines. Here they are, in ascending order of awfulness....

Chelsea's Yossi Benayoun Shows Off A "Cheeky Finish" In A "Behind-Closed-Doors" Friendly Match
EPL powerhouse Chelsea played its first preseason match of the year yesterday. They did so against a woefully overmatched foe, the Wycombe Wanderers. Four minutes in, Yossi Benayoun fancied the ball into the net in a fashion that would stand out even at the end of the season. Good for Yossi. (H/T ...

Seven Minutes Of An Argentinian Man Cursing At His Soccer Match On TV, With English Subtitles
We hope you saw the original last week; it's delightful. We want to this man to became as famous here as he is in his homeland, so here's the same video with his nonstop stream of creative profanity translated into English....

Mick McCarthy's Secret To Successfully Managing A Soccer Team: Handshakes
Wolverhampton manager Mick McCarthy has finally revealed the secret to his immense success. Every morning, McCarthy greets his players by firmly pressing his palm meat against their palm meat, curling his fingers around their fingers and ecstatically pumping his hand inside theirs. Over and over. Un...