soccer Page 270 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Argentine National Team Given Go-Ahead To Hump Its Way To World Cup Glory
Argentina's World Cup doctor says the squad will be allowed to sleep with "regular partners...without champagne or other drinks" during the tournament since sex is "not a problem in itself." Given recent events, Maradona's response to this news will be exquisite. [iAfrica.com]...

US Fans Create Horrific Image To Stir Up World Cup Rivalry
Here at The Spoiler, arts and crafts are held in very high esteem, be it the infantile crayon drawings of a child/Jamie Carragher, or a beautiful marble sculpture from the hands of Michelangelo/David James....

What’s This? A Video BRIMMING With Rooney Goals?
As reported in today's Sun, Wayne Rooney shall be saving his goals for the World Cup. It's a very kind gesture by the young man......

Your US World Cup Squad Open Thread
In just a few minutes, the Yanks' 23-man World Cup roster will be announced live on ESPN. Use this space to weigh in on Onyewu's fitness, Davies's exclusion, and whether Edson or Herculez has the best first name....

Today In Tacky World Cup Marketing: Hyundai's Soccer Car
Soccer-ball wheels, soccer-cleat sideviews, artificial-turf interiors make for one hideous promotional vehicle. At the same time, shouldn't every sport be doing this? I want to laugh at a Ford F-150 outfitted with a Buccaneers helmet, stat. [Copyranter]...

Mexico Fans Win Important Football Fancy Dress Battle
During any football match, there are numerous battles going on. You've got the obvious one on the pitch, accompanied by hundreds of verbal ones in local pubs around the country, whilst in a wasteland somewhere geographically equidistant from the clubs......

Mourinho Celebrates With Incredible Display Of Spitting
For those of you too busy pinking up your faces and sloshing back summertime pints, Jose Mourinho had a great night on Saturday, bagging another Champions League trophy, before celebrating with a home made water fountain. Some highlights after the jump....

Maradona's Pot To Piss In Now Classy As All Get-Out
The Argentine boss demanded the standard toilets in his South Africa suite be replaced with two of "The World's Best Toilet Seat," just $449.95. Why two? One for the cocaine, obviously. [Daily Mail]...

Diarra Diarrhea Costs France A Midfielder
Lassana Diarra will miss the World Cup with what's euphemistically being called "a stomach ailment" or "intestinal pains." It must have been contagious when the entire team nearly shit the bed against Ireland. [AP]...

World Cup Profile: USA
Today, it's the turn of those lovely American chaps, who will be seriously attempting to urinate on England's chips during the group stages. But can they do it? And, more importantly, who ARE these people? Read on to find out…...

Watch Nike's Newest Bloated, Overwrought, Meta-Referential But Sorta Awesome World Cup Commercial
In case you haven't noticed, soccer's been popping up around here with alarming frequency. It's because of the World Cup, mostly. The World Cup is sort of a big deal, like the World Baseball Classic, but exciting....

A Zany Video Of Fat Ronaldo Throughout The Years
Here at The Spoiler technology is king. So, as you can probably imagine, there are nifty little gadgets and terrifying gizmos all over the place. Even so, it was with a sharp intake of breath that the above video was first witnessed....

Soccer Commentary Can Be Hard To Understand But This Is Ridiculous (Video)
Click to view Tossing it down to a reporter on the scene always carries the risk of going haywire. That was the unfortunate case recently when British soccer's answer to Tony Siragusa was asked if there were any updates about the game. [Today's Big Thing]...

Footballer’s Snazzy House — Can You Guess The Owner?
For those of you wondering exactly what £100,000/week might buy you, then this should give you an idea....

La Liga Side Takes On 200 Children — And Wins!
To celebrate Joseba Etxeberria's career, Athletic Bilbao played a match against 200 Basque children, beating them 5-3. Which is fitting, because playing against children is what most La Liga matches feel like for Barca and Real....

Turkish Soccer Fans Set Fire To Their Own Seats
Fans of Istanbul's Fenerbahce were annoyed that a final day draw gave their hated rivals the Turkish League title, so they rationally decided to tear their home stadium apart from the inside. Yeah, that'll learn 'em. [Daily Mail]...

Greatest Football Chants Of The Season REVEALED
Football fans love a good chant, and this season has heard plenty of them....

Two Very Different Approaches To Honoring Your Contract
Houston's Andre Johnson wants to re-negotiate his seven-year contract that has five years remaining on it. Oguchi Onyewu wants to play for AC Milan so badly, he'll do it for free. Who is the dummy and who is the hero?...

Thierry Henry Is Coming To The MLS, Probably
The French striker is reportedly maybe coming to the MLS's misnomer-laden New York Red Bulls, just as soon as France is knocked out of the World Cup. Or he isn't. Or he is, but we shouldn't talk about it yet....