sox Page 26 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
And Now: Ken "Hawk" Harrelson & Steve Stone Discuss Hemorrhoids<em></em>
It’s late July and the White Sox are dutifully maintaining their position at the bottom of the American League. In other bottom-related news, here’s your White Sox announcing crew discussing hemorrhoids during the sixth inning of today’s matchup in Kansas City—one the team lost on a walk-off double ...
Red Sox Mercifully End Pablo Sandoval's Sad, Horrendous Time In Boston<em></em>
Since signing a five-year, $95 million contract with the Boston Red Sox in 2015, Pablo Sandoval has been an unqualified disaster. Sandoval played just 161 games in two and a half seasons with the Red Sox, hitting .237/.286/.360/with 14 home runs. When he wasn’t hurt or playing poorly, he struggled t...
White Sox Call Up Top Prospect (And Twinkie Lover) Yoan Moncada<em></em><em></em>
Yoan Moncada, the 22-year-old Cuban second baseman, will make his first major-league appearance for the White Sox tonight, acting in essence as the first ambassador for the Sox’s now extremely stacked farm system and offering Sox fans their first glimpse of a future the team has promised will have b...
White Sox Add To Prospect Stash While <em></em>Sending Todd Frazier, David Robertson And Tommy Kahnle To Yankees
The White Sox are sending all three of their most heavily rumored trade chips—third baseman Todd Frazier and relievers David Robertson and Tommy Kahnle—to the Yankees in exchange for prospects Blake Rutherford, Ian Clarkin and Tito Polo plus, uh, Tyler Clippard. ...
White Sox Announcer Who Rejected Fried Pickle Also Rejects Frozen Turkey
The Chicago White Sox are playing the Los Angeles Dodgers, who are pitching Clayton Kershaw, tonight. Let’s talk about what happened Friday night, when Sox play-by-play man Jason Benetti presented color man Steve Stone, who previously rejected a fried pickle, with a frozen turkey on his 70th birthda...
Fenway Gives And Fenway Takes
The Yankees and Red Sox split a day-night doubleheader on Sunday, trading shutouts for just the third time in the history of the clubs. They also taught us a valuable lesson about home runs: Sometimes it’s not how hard you hit them, but where. Especially in a weirdo ballpark like Fenway....
There Is No Making Sense Of Matt Holliday's Bizarre Base Running Blunder
You know when you zone out at a stoplight, and then you suddenly sense traffic moving around you, and so you accelerate a little too quickly, but it turns out you don’t have a green light, it’s the turn lane next to you that has a green arrow, and so you have to stomp the brakes like a shithead, but...
White Sox Announcer: "We Have No Budget Left For The Second Half Of The Season"
While discussing how he bribed people to say nice things to color man Steve Stone on his birthday during the top of the first inning of tonight’s tilt against the Seattle Mariners, Chicago White Sox play-by-play man Jason Benetti admitted that the team had run out of money for the announcing team to...
KatyPerrysBootyHole And Wetbutt23 Broke The Jose Quintana Trade
The White Sox’s trade of starter Jose Quintana to the Cubs for four minor leaguers went down with remarkable secrecy, with no leaks and no rumors that the teams were even working on it. (It later emerged that Rick Hahn and Theo Epstein ducked backstage at the All-Star FanFest to talk business.) Wel...
White Sox Trade Ace José Quintana To—Oh Fucking Come On
The Chicago White Sox announced today that they have traded 28-year-old ace pitcher José Quintana to the fucking Chicago Cubs, who are basically worse than the St. Louis Cardinals at this point....
White Sox Writer Believes Team's First Half Was Not As Bad As It Could Have Been
The Chicago White Sox are 38-49; their last game before the All-Star break was a 10-0 loss to the Colorado Rockies in which they were two outs away from getting no-hit in the most hitter-friendly ballpark in the majors. The team is last in the AL Central. Pitcher José Quintana is on the trading bloc...
Red Sox Fan Accused Of Trying To Frame The Left With Very Lame Anti-Trump Graffiti
A Connecticut man wearing a Red Sox shirt was caught on camera defacing signs at a school playground with anti-Trump graffiti in June—but after being caught, he admitted to police he supported Trump and was trying to make the “Left” look bad....
Adrian Beltre Humbled By Incredibly Slow Pitch
Rangers third baseman Adrian Beltre, whose habit of falling to one knee while batting is second only to his absolute hatred of having his head touched in a ranking of Adrian Beltre quirks, did not expect a 61-mph pitch from Red Sox reliever Fernando Abad in Wednesday’s game. The result was a powerfu...
White Sox Allow Rajai Davis To Steal As Many Bases As He Pleases
The Chicago White Sox finished up a three-game trip to Oakland with a 7-4 loss. Mike Pelfrey didn’t pitch well and Avisail Garcia went 0-for-4, only looking at nine pitches in the process. However, catcher Kevan Smith had the worst night of the bunch, as he allowed former World Series home run-hitte...
David Price Continues His War On The Boston Media
David Price has been extra salty with reporters this year. Right off the bat, he declared that he wouldn’t be speaking to the media except on days when he starts, and then he got into a strange shouting match with CSNNE’s Evan Drellich after a game last month. Lately, it’s been more of the same....
This Stellar Play By Dustin Pedroia Deserves Multiple Viewings
On Monday night, while you were getting drunk for the fourth night in a row, Dustin Pedroia made an unbelievable play in Arlington that saved Craig Kimbrel’s ass and helped the Red Sox get a win in extras....
Rick Porcello Is A Mess, But All Is Not Lost
Red Sox starter Rick Porcello seems to have been body-snatched. After winning the AL Cy Young last year, Porcello has now allowed four or more runs 10 times this season, which, per The Boston Globe’s Alex Speier, leads the majors. His ERA is an unsightly 5.06, and opponents are hitting .309 against ...
Blight Sox: Chyron Edition
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White Sox Pitcher Gives Up First Career Dingers To Three A's Rookies
James Shields took the mound today for the sad-sack White Sox, and in the course of pitching three brutal innings gave up a two-run dinger to Matt Olson, another two-run dinger to Franklin Barreto, and a solo dong to Jaycob Brugman. Olson, Barreto, and Brugman are rookies. It’s wild enough to give u...
Gronk And Dustin Pedroia Work Very, Very Blue At The David Ortiz Roast
Dustin Pedroia, Anthony Mackie, Bill Burr, and improvisational quarter keg Rob Gronkowski showed up at a roast for David Ortiz yesterday. Gronk’s material was clearly prewritten; Pedroia’s was supposedly not. One was clearly funnier than the other....