sox Page 76 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Give Him Liberty, Or Give Him Beer: Rowdy Fan Says He Was 'Striking Back For Red Sox Nation'
When his colonial ancestors were being oppressed by a larger, more formidable power, they fought back the only way they knew how; with bold, guerrilla tactics. Could Red Sox fan Chris Sciesinski do any less? Trapped behind enemy lines at Tropicana Field, taunted and scorned beyond all reason by Tamp...

Could There Be A More Fitting Metaphor For The AL East Race?
Don't tase Boston's divisional title chances, bro! If this isn't a sign from the baseball gods that the race is over in the East, I don't know what is. This Red Sox fan tried to leap the dugout and run onto the field at the Trop on Wednesday, but was met with Epic Failure: security grabbed him, and ...

Big Papi's Bed Will End Homelessness, Achieve Peace In The Middle East
I have always dreamed of sleeping in Big Papi's bed, but until now I never thought that it could become a reality. Now it's here; the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to own Big Papi's bed. I don't know for sure, but I imagine that sleeping there would be like nestling into a warm, comforting hug by t...

Mock The Mohawk At Your Own Peril
Silly? Yes; especially when you consider that manager Joe Maddon is wearing one. But the Rays' new mohawk look seems to have mystical powers; a force that the Boston Red Sox were not able to overcome on Tuesday. The Rays broke free from a virtual tie with Boston atop the standings with a 2-1 win at ...

Curt Schilling Puts the Moves on Cindy McCain?
Everyone knows that Curt Schilling loves John McCain. But can the Republican presidential nominee trust the Red Sox pitcher when it comes to something much more important than an election...his wife? At a recent charity event, Curt Schilling confused Cindy McCain with his wife and held hands with h...

Universe Rights Itself, Soon Should Be Completely Normal
Like in the Michael Douglas film Falling Down, Joe Maddon is wearing a short-sleeved dress shirt and demanding breakfast at McDonald's, even though its past 11:30. Sorry Joe. We're back where we were in July 24; the Red Sox and Rays, tied for first in the East. Only this time Boston clearly has mome...

The Papelbon Dirty Dancing Videos Are Here. Oh, Man
If the Red Sox fail to win the East this season — and let's face it, it's looking more and more doubtful — we can probably blame this. One is never really prepared for a video of Jonathan Papelbon at a high school talent show performing Dirty Dancing routines in drag; it's just a shock to the system...

Your American League Video Roundup; Now With More Squirrel
First of all, kudos to Cleveland broadcasters Matt Underwood and Rick Manning for not resorting to Willy Wonka references as this squirrel invades Jacobs Field in the ninth inning of the White Sox-Indians game last week. The Indians had the infield shift on and the squirrel obviously felt that third...

Why Your Team Won't Make The Playoffs: American League
And down the stretch they come! A look ahead at the final few weeks of the regular season, and why your team is doomed, in capsule form. Today, the American League ... East • 1. Tampa Bay Rays. Record: 85-56. Magic number: 20. Big strength: Evan Longoria is back after a stint on disabled list with a...

Ozzie Guillen Bids Farewell To His Personal Lord Voldemort
Reaction to Jay Mariotti's resignation from the Chicago Sun-Times continues to pour in — there hasn't been this much freewheeling glee since the announcement of the end of World War II — and of course Ozzie Guillen is leading the hurrahs. While admitting that his own tenure in Chicago most assuredly...

Alex Rodriguez And The Art Of The Double Play
Let it be known that the Yankees officially succumbed in the AL East last night; time of death 10:27 p.m., EST. It was all Alex Rodriguez's fault, of course. The only question is, what shall we call him after his 0-for-5 performance in a 7-3 loss to the Red Sox? Boo-Rod? A-Flop? A-Rod And Out? A-Wad...

Cubs Or White Sox? Obama Invites North Side Scorn
As you saw in our morning video pancake breakfast, ESPN's Stuart Scott figured that the best way to get to know Barack Obama was to play him in a game of one-on-one (hard foul, Obama takes an elbow to the head! Now they're brawling! ...). Scott then sat down with the Democratic Presidential nominee ...

The Strange Saga Of A.J. Pierzynski And Doug Eddings Continues
Is this the episode where Doug Eddings reveals that he is A.J. Pierzynski's father? Something's going on; and the Rays aren't happy about it. Take a look at this play in the 10th, where it appears that Pierzynski is tagged out in a rundown between second and third. But second base umpire Eddings rul...

Get Ready To Panic, ESPN; Yankees And Red Sox May Both Miss Playoffs
The year was 1993. Bill Clinton ascends to the White House. The Bills lose their third consecutive Super Bowl. "Whoomp! (There It Is)" by Tag Team is America's No. 1 song. And in a strike-shortened season, both the Yankees and Red Sox fail to make the playoffs. That's the last time that's happened, ...

Lawsuit Alleges Priest Molested Boy at 2005 White Sox Game
The lawsuit was filed against the Chicago Archdiocese yesterday. The alleged molester, priest Daniel McCormick, has already been the subject of a lawsuit settled on behalf of the archdiocese last week. In that case 11 priests were sued by 16 children. The alleged molestation occured in August of 20...

Mike Timlin Will Take Care Of Your Ballpark Rat Problem
As long as Red Sox pitcher Mike Timlin is alive, Heidi Watney will never go hungry. Hope you enjoy squirrel, Heidi. You mean to say that hawk was a lovable team mascot? Sorry, my bad. Now, watch me shoot an apple off of a teammate's head. Damn it, hold still Youkilis! From Timlin's bio: ...

New White Sox Danger: Shaving Cream Pies to the Face
And you thought Ozzie Guillen was all the White Sox had to fear in the locker room. Backup catcher Toby Hall is recovering after Jermaine Dye blocked his attempted pie to the face. Does anyone ever wonder where all these pies come from in baseball locker rooms? How many times have you had extra pie...

Kelly Clarkson, Drunk At A Red Sox Game Once Again
Here's a backward-hatted Kelly Clarkson and friends doing what true Red Sox fans do best: consuming beer and singing Sweet Caroline at Fenway. (Should it concern us that she's off key?). Hey, just be glad it isn't Ben Affleck and Jimmy Fallon. Red Sox Monster, which seems to be a bit overly fasci...

Epic Squander: Red Sox, Rangers Entertain The Masses
I propose uninstalling this scoreboard now and preserving it in a museum. People of the future are going to want to study it, and it has to be the real thing; no one is going to believe the photos. Future kid: "Dad, how did this one team almost blow a 10-run, first inning lead?" Future Dad: "It's th...

Did The White Sox Just Win The Central?
So the White Sox lost Jose Contreras for the season on Saturday in a loss to Boston, falling out of first in the Central. That made Sunday's contest somewhat more than your run-of-the-mill game. And Chicago's 6-5, come-from-behind win over the Red Sox just may have put them back into first place for...