spain Page 3 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Iranian Defender: "Diego Costa Cussed Everyone In My Life"
Diego Costa can be a huge dick. In addition to stomping, scratching, and attempting to bite his opponents, he once threw his spit onto Sergio Ramos (yes, he spit into his hand then threw it at another human being—twice). These transgressions, combined with his constant scowling and general grumpines...

Cristiano Ronaldo Caps Incredible Game With Incredible Hat-Trick Free-Kick Goal
Cristiano Ronaldo just played one of the best games of his life. He was outstanding throughout today’s Portugal-Spain match, holding up play like a champ, giving life to numerous counterattacks with ingenious flicks and passes, and, oh yeah, scoring three goddamn goals in what ended as a 3-3 tie. Hi...

Ugly Boner Gifts Ronaldo His Second Goal Of The World Cup
A pretty goofy first half between Portugal and Spain ended with a huge momentum swing for Portugal thanks to a giant boner from Spanish goalie David de Gea, normally one of the best shot stoppers in the world....

Spain Shoots Its Own Dick Off In The Name Of Propriety, Fires Manager One Day Before World Cup
The Spanish soccer federation (RFEF) announced today that it has fired its national team manager Julen Lopetegui, on the eve of the World Cup, because Lopetegui did not “act the right way.” The infraction? Lopetegui accepted a job managing Real Madrid, which would have started after the World Cup, w...

Real Madrid's New Manager Julen Lopetegui Thinks Messi Is Better Than Ronaldo
Real Madrid announced Julen Lopetegui as their new manager today, just two weeks after Zinedine Zidane resigned abruptly from the job after winning the Champions League title. Lopetegui is currently manager of Spain’s national team and won’t take over at Real Madrid until after the World Cup....

Spain Could Very Well End Up Winning The World Cup Again
Spain, it appears, are back. The team that won three international titles in a span of four years (the 2008 and 2012 Euros, and the 2010 World Cup), and then followed it up by crashing out of the 2014 World Cup in the group stage and losing to Italy in the round of 16 in the 2016 European Championsh...

Future Of Basketball Luka Dončić<em></em> Gets A Rare Triple-Double In Spain
Possible first-overall draft pick Luka Dončić, who’s been playing in Spain with Real Madrid since he was 16, is already the kind of all-around athletic beast who appears to be the final form that every basketball player is evolving towards. He’s a six-foot-eight guard/forward hybrid who’s comfortabl...

Lionel Messi Did Not Have Fun At Spain's 6-1 Drubbing Of Argentina Today
Just a couple of months before June’s World Cup begins, a next-generation Spain squad incinerated a mostly full-strength Argentina in Madrid today, riding an Isco hat trick to a 6-1 laugher. It’s only a friendly, but still, it wasn’t good, and Argentina star Lionel Messi, missing the game with a ham...

What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
If Christmas is all about putting stuff up butts, New Year’s Day is the day to read about the many methods of absolute destruction of America’s dick and balls, and to be thankful it wasn’t you. Unless it was....

What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?
If it’s Christmas, it must be time to learn what America shoved inside itself. The only worthwhile holiday tradition pushes on....

Catalonia Explodes
By now, you’ve probably seen the images on Twitter or Facebook of Spanish police in riot gear breaking a Catalan woman’s fingers, beating people as they sought medical attention, and even battling firemen. The shocking violence came as Spanish authorities tried, in vain, to block the referendum for ...

Barcelona Play In An Empty Stadium After Attempted Independence Vote
On the day of a controversial referendum on Catalonian independence, which led to the Spanish police shutting down polling stations and firing rubber bullets at a crowd of voters, Barcelona’s game against Las Palmas was closed to the public and played in an empty Camp Nou due to security concerns....

Marc Gasol's Slick Passing Is A Delight In Any Competition
Spain’s wonderful Gasol-led national team today took on a Czech Republic squad that was distressingly overpowered given the presence of Wizards’ backup and future All-NBA guard Tomas Satoransky. This was a Eurobasket group stage match, played in Romania....

Cristiano Ronaldo's Hissy Fit Is Reportedly Almost Over
It hasn’t even been a full week since Cristiano Ronaldo’s camp began leaking to anyone who’d listen that he was done with Spain and had resolved to leave Real Madrid, a supposedly “irreversible” decision borne of his deep feelings of persecution because the Spanish government has taken issue with hi...

Spanish Prosecutors Charge Jose Mourinho With €<em></em>3.3 Million Tax Fraud
According to Spanish prosecutors, Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho owes the state €3.3 million in taxes from his time coaching Real Madrid in 2011 and 2012, as El Mundo reported....

Eldense Coach Insists 12-0 Loss Wasn't Fixed, Says Barca B Refused To Abide By Mercy Rule
In the last week, Spanish Segunda Division club Eldense were thrashed 12-0 by Barcelona B, accused of fixing the match, and saw their coach and manager arrested and charged with corruption. (Two players and another coach were arrested Wednesday.) Despite evidence to the contrary, Eldense coach Fili...

Spanish Soccer Dads Celebrate Father's Day By Beating Each Other Up
A game between Spanish youth sides Alaró and Collerense was interrupted and later canceled yesterday after a bunch of riled up sports parents got into a big brawl. El Confidencial reports that an Alaró player made a hard tackle, which sparked an argument. The argument then roped in a herd of overeag...

Good Soccer Man Embarrasses A Quartet Of Defenders
Jonathan Mejía and his UCAM Murcia squad lost to Real Valladolid on Saturday in some hot second-division Spanish soccer action, but really, who cares, for young Mejía scored the goal of his life. Look at the Honduran international turn these four dudes into jelly....

What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
OK, so you’ve already learned about all the things we shoved inside ourselves last year. But what about our dangly bits? Rest assured, we punished them....

What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?<em></em><em></em>
Deadspin’s Christmas Day tradition returns. It is time to sound the depths of the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission’s database of emergency room visits. Below are the strangest, most awkwardly shaped, and least pleasant objects that America has shoved into its various holes. God bless us, eve...