st-louis Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Paranormal Activity: Paul DeJong Bends Foul Ball With His Mind (REAL!)
A couple of explanations for this very strange, uh, “base hit” in the first inning of tonight’s Giants-Cardinals game. One: Paul DeJong, being a very science-minded fellow with sincere, demonstrated interest in the way external forces affect the trajectory of a baseball, figured out a split-second b...
Crotchety Rockies Broadcasters Wish Harm On Idiot On The Field
An idiot ran out onto the field during the second inning of Thursday night’s Rockies-Cardinals game in St. Louis. An army of security personnel briefly chased the goof around the outfield and then the infield. The crowd ate it up; the batter had a chuckle; even several Cardinals players appeared to ...
Paul DeJong Pulled A "The Natural" On The Big Mac Sign In St. Louis
You know the big, climactic ending to The Natural, where Robert Redford booms a huge, pennant-winning bomb that knocks out a lighting fixture in the stadium? Okay, so maybe Paul DeJong’s sixth-inning homer in the Cardinals’ 3-0 win against the Brewers in mid-August isn’t quite that dramatic, even if...
Report: MLS Will Expand To St. Louis, Might Not Completely Fleece The City For A Stadium
Congratulations, St. Louis! According to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, the city has successfully thrown enough money around and greased the right wheels to win economic promotion to MLS!...
Dastardly Cardinals Pitcher Totally Gets Away With Cheating
During the top of the third inning of Wednesday night’s Cubs-Cardinals game, I briefly slipped into a coma and dreamt of Eduardo Pérez and Jon Sciambi facing off in the kal-if-fee. In the bottom of the third inning, Cardinals pitcher Miles Mikolas totally cheated and got away with it....
Here Are All The People Who Complained To The FCC About The St. Louis Blues Saying "Fuck"
When the St. Louis Blues won their first-ever Stanley Cup back in June, they said “fuck”—and all its variations—a lot. Audible to anyone watching on TV at home was “fuckin-a,” “fuck yeah,” “fuckin’ right,” “holy fuck,” and “let’s fuckin’ go” as the team took turns raising the Cup, until NBC finally ...
Pirates Broadcasters Load Up Their Diapers Over Dumb Unwritten Rules Violation
The Pirates got pounded to hell by the dreaded Cardinals Wednesday night, eventually losing by the score of 14–8. The score manages to misrepresent just how lopsided the game was—the Cardinals scored nine runs in the second inning and chased two Pirates pitchers before the end of the fourth inning. ...
Yasiel Puig Starts Very Uncommon Double Play With Very Badass Throw
Harrison Bader of the St. Louis Cardinals is really, really fast, but that speed certainly does not give him license to behave in a disrespectful manner! Thursday night against the Reds, Bader tried to go from first to third on a blooper to right field, which practically invited the rally-suffocatin...
Bob Gibson has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, according to a report in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. The Cardinals legend, nine-time All-Star, two-time NL Cy Young Award winner, two-time World Series champion and member of MLB’s All-Century Team has been in a hospital in Omaha for the past c...
Cardinals Flamethrower Jordan Hicks Shredded His Pitching Elbow
In some MLB injury news that felt as sadly inevitable as it is disappointing, St. Louis Cardinals closer Jordan Hicks is likely out for the long-term future, as the team announced today that he tore the UCL in his right (throwing) elbow. The Cardinals said they are “determining the next course of ac...
Jack Flaherty Gets Picked Off To End The Game, Soaks In His Failure On The Field
This has happened to the Cardinals before, albeit on a much bigger stage. St. Louis was down 7-6 in the bottom of the 11th inning, with two outs and pinch-runner Jack Flaherty on second base, when Marlins reliever Sergio Romo whipped around for a game-ending pickoff, to the dismay of the home crowd....
Matt Carpenter Beats A Marlins Shift With A Standup Bunt Double
Turns out the solo dinger he smashed in the bottom of the third inning was not the coolest thing Matt Carpenter did against the Miami Marlins Monday night, not by a long shot. With two down in the bottom of the fifth inning, the Marlins shifted their defense to the right side to face Carpenter. Carp...
Zach Sanford Barfs All Over Himself During Blues Stanley Cup Victory Parade
The 2019 Stanley Cup champion St. Louis Blues held their victory parade Saturday, celebrating the franchise’s first ever title. As is usually the case with victory parades, this event featured blissed-out sports men consuming inadvisable quantities of alcohol. Some handled it better than others—Bre...
Brett Hull Drunkenly Encourages St. Louis Crowd To Start A "We Went Blues" Chant
The annual tradition of hockey players attempting to stretch the physical limits of their livers continued today in St. Louis with the Blues parading the Stanley Cup throughout the city amongst a raucous fan base. While there were plenty of clips of hockey players drinking the way hockey players ten...
St. Louis Blues Fans Yelled, Did Cartwheels, And Lost A Wedding Ring After Their First Stanley Cup Victory
After the St. Louis Blues won their first Stanley Cup on Wednesday night, fans celebrated on streets and in bars until the wee hours of the morning. The local news caught up with some of the yelling, cartwheeling, and sweaty revelers. One poor soul said he lost his wedding ring while high-fiving peo...
One Sequence Choked The Life Out Of The Bruins
Game 7 and thus the Stanley Cup Final ended in a 2:34 stretch in the third, and, on one level, Brayden Schenn’s goal to put the Blues up 3-0 was anticlimactic. Yes, it put the game functionally out of reach for the Bruins. But what it really meant was a stoppage in play, and so was the first time w...
What The Hell Was Brad Marchand Doing On The Game-Winning Goal?
Brad Marchand does a lot of stupid shit, but usually not like this. Sure, he’s constantly trash-talking, poking, licking his opponents, trying to get a rise out of them through the simplest and pettiest ways possible. But Marchand’s dumb moment in Game 7 didn’t serve any larger purpose for himself o...
Lift Stanley And Play "Gloria"
The St. Louis Blues are Stanley Cup champions. Say it to yourself, because no one’s ever been able to say it before. Swish it around in your mouth like a sommelier, picking out notes of gratification, bliss, and disbelief. Do not spit it out, because when you win the Stanley Cup, you keep drinking. ...
St. Louis Blues Win Stanley Cup In Game 7 By Humiliating Some Losers Who Can't Handle Jordan Binnington
The Blues frickin’ did it. After sloppily face-planting in a Game 6 clinch opportunity at home, the St. Louis Blues bounced back and won Game 7 in enemy territory on Wednesday night by a score of 4-1. In doing so, captain Alex Pietrangelo hoisted his franchise’s first-ever Stanley Cup since the Blue...