steroids Page 24 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Todd Sauerbrun Gets Suspended for Fat Kid Pills
The Denver Broncos Todd Sauerbrun will most likely face a one month suspension after his pee -pee test revealed that he had dietary supplement Ephedra in his system. As you may remember, Ephedra was a popular drug used to curb people's appetites, speed up their metabolism, and, oh yeah, possibly k...
The Glory That Is Jose
OK, we had to dig back into this Jose Canseco asking for a trade....
If You Can Trust Anyone, You Can Trust Jose Canseco
Yesterday, Major League Baseball released a Strongly Worded Statement, making it clear that former Madonna statue Jose Canseco's claims — that Bud Selig and Co. could cover up a positive steroid test if the player (namely, Roger Clemens) were popular enough — "complete nonsense." It is the next in...
Canseco Signs With Surf Dawgs. Of Course.
It's a story that San Diego anchorman Ron Burgundy would have been all over like a polyester suit: We were surprised to learn this morning that Jose Canseco has agreed to play minor league baseball with the San Diego Surf Dawgs. Surprised, only because, naturally, we assumed his next move would be...
Grand Theft Auto: BALCO
So in the new Grand Theft Auto game, one of your "missions," according to Sam at SLAM Online, is to hunt down and kill an informer planning on giving a doping report on "our country's most famous athletes" to the FBI. The man, we're told, has more than a passing resemblance to BALCO barker Victory C...
The French Are Shockingly Persistent With This
The French media's treatment of Lance Armstrong is starting to make the American media's treatment of Barry Bonds look downright Jason McElwain-ish. They're still hung up on the idea that they can somehow prove that Lance Armstrong used steroids, EPO, or some other sort of performance enhancer....
Segui Scandal Fails To Rock Major League Baseball
David Segui, who hit 139 homeruns in 15 years in Major League Baseball, is one of the players named in Jason Grimsley's affidavit. Segui fully admits to his use of Human Growth Hormone, and claims that it was all perfectly legal, medically necessary, and done under a doctor's care....
One Last Word On Grimsley ... For Now
Well, it's been a fun weekend around these parts, with our sudden popularity on Kansas City talk radio and our father's concerned, confused "The man on the radio says you said Albert Pujols did steroids. Did you say that, Will?" (No, Dad, we didn't. What did we tell you about sports talk radio, Dad?...
Justice For Barry Bonds
A little upset that Jason Grimsley had been stealing his thunder, Barry Bonds is back in the headlines. He's dropped his lawsuit against Mark Fainaru-Wada and Lance Williams, authors of "Game of Shadows," a book that contained parts of his grand jury testimony. The lawsuit was intended to stop the...
KC Trainer Responds, Denies Affidavit Cameo
OK, probably time for a Jason Grimsley update....
So ... We've Got Some Affidavit Names
Everyone's guessing about who the blacked-out names in the Jason Grimsley report are, and it has been a fun parlor game so far. But we all knew eventually the names would get out. And we've been digging around ... and some sources have given us some names....
Strap In For The Grimsley Express
So we've been digging through this Jason Grimsley affidavit, and there's some pretty fun stuff. We understand the mindset behind what one commenter called "the missing white girl story of the week" aspect of this, but we kind of have a feeling this might stick. Some highlights:...
Victor Conte And The Day The Music Died
In response to our post on BALCO-ape man Victor Conte from yesterday, a reader (actually a caller) points out that not only is Conte a musician, but he was the bass player for Tower of Power for a time in the 1970s ... albeit for only a little more than a year. His brother, Bruce Conte, was the mo...
Victor Conte Is Ready To Bring Some RAWK
If you've read Game Of Shadows, you know that BALCO founder Victor Conte is a bit of a self-promotional carnival barker tool. It's part of his charm, we suppose. But you also know that Conte was once a musician, and now that his prison time is served, he appears ready to rock again....
In The Oblique Wake ...
OK, we figure we're probably ready to talk about this now....
Clemens Decides To Stay In Houston, Yep
Credit Newsday's Ken Davidoff with the big scoop: Roger Clemens is signing with the Houston Astros....
ESPN Bonds Chroniclers About To Be Released Into The Wild
We would say our long national nightmare is almost over, but we have a feeling the nightmare was only in our heads all along....
Ghosts Of Web Site Past
We don't know why, but we guess we kind of thought that Web sites representing companies that were obviously proven fraudulent and felonius would, as a matter of courtesy, either disgorge themselves from the Interweb, or, at the very least, stop updating....
The David Wells Mad Lib
Obviously, David Wells — as evidenced by his appearance on the waiver wire in just about every fantasy league we're in — is much more useful as a quote machine these days than as an actual baseball player. And he's never more amusing than when he's being edited to suit the taste of the delicate ne...