stupid Page 11 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Are You A Bay Area Pro Athlete? San Francisco Might Owe You A Parking Ticket Refund
Today, at 3:43 EST, Deadspin received one of the better tips we’ve seen in a while. Reader Zain was checking to see if the City of San Francisco owed him any money from parking tickets that he overpaid. Unfortunately for him, they did not. But fortunately for us and Tim Lincecum, Zain discovered tha...
Nate Diaz Accuses Conor McGregor Of Steroid Use At Impressively Ludicrous Press Conference
It’s late February and not much is going on in sports, so the press conference the UFC held today to promote Conor McGregor’s upcoming fight against Nate Diaz was the most entertaining happening of the day largely by default. Even so, it was really something, every bit as dumb as could be hoped....
What Time Does 'What Time Does The Superbowl Start?' Start?
At some point tomorrow, the Carolina Panthers and the Denver Broncos will play against each other in the Super Bowl. However, a much more widely-contested game, between, oh, every publication, has already started. ...
Can Cristiano Ronaldo Dunk?
So a couple hours ago, Cristiano Ronaldo—who is one of the greatest players in the history of the game of soccer because he is also one of the most physically dominant athletes of all time in any sport anywhere—posted a photo of himself dunking a soccer ball on a basketball hoop. My colleagues, a de...
Real Madrid Are Still Humping The Story That Ronaldo Cost More Than Bale
Of all of Cristiano Ronaldo’s various behavioral quirks, which have brought us so many laughs over the years, one of the funniest and most puzzling is his curious attachment to being the most expensive player alive. When he first came to Real Madrid, the club paid what was then a world record transf...
More Evidence That Tom Brady Is A Fancy Dog
We have previously put forward the theory that Patriots quarterback Tom Brady is in fact a fancy dog. For those of you who scoffed at our perfectly sound reasoning, I present more irrefutable evidence that Tom Brady is indeed a dog, and a fancy one at that....
Ragnar No More Viking, Ragnar Packers Fan Now
Aggrieved biking viking Ragnar, who was the Vikings mascot since 1993 until this year, turned his back on Minnesota today for good. In a short video, he committed the cardinal sin of backing the Green Bay Packers and drew the ire of fellow former Viking Randy Moss....
Wow, It's The Most Difficult "Can You Find The Panda?" Puzzle Yet
Over the course of the last week or so, you may have noticed some version of this puzzle popping up in one of your social media feeds:...
What Does This Headline Mean?
Sam Farmer wrote a column which started with the recent spate of injuries to playoff-bound NFL quarterbacks for Tuesday’s edition of the Los Angeles Times. The copy’s fine, but the headline has puzzled me and others on the Deadspin staff for a couple of days now....
Shayne Graham Scoring Glitch Enrages Yahoo Fantasy Football Players
Shayne Graham, the newly signed Falcons kicker, is in the midst of the best fantasy football performance of all time, as his 16 field goals are good for 48 points in Yahoo leagues. This first came to our attention as our alleged former colleague Kyle Wagner talked some shit online....
Lopez Twins Say They Won't Live Together Because Their Cats Fight Too Much
Brook and Robin Lopez are notoriously tight. They hosted an NBA blooper reel show for Disney this summer, once skipped out on Stanford practice together to head to Disneyland, and they are apparently writing partners who are working on a pilot or two. So you’d think that they would want to live toge...
Is Tom Brady A Fancy Dog?
Patriots quarterback Tom Brady is on the cover of GQ’s Men of the Year issue, and the cover story is accompanied by a slideshow of artfully produced photos of Brady. These pictures have left us asking one question, though: Is Tom Brady a fancy dog? Let’s go to the evidence:...
Joe Theismann Says He Did Not Tell A Man Looking For An Autograph To Grow Some Tits
On Nov. 2, someone on Twitter claimed that his uncle asked former Skins quarterback Joe Theismann for an autograph, and Theismann told the man to grow some tits. Wow, that’s harsh. Did Joe really do that? He responded today:...
French Media Calls In Body Language Expert To Divine Ronaldo's Secret Intentions
Every couple years, the European media works itself into a bubbly froth about Cristiano Ronaldo’s future. We’re now in the thick of yet another foamy period, and perhaps because his departure might actually be imminent this time, the papers are going to absurd lengths to search for clues....
The Best And Dumbest Meme Is Unfolding On The Panthers' Facebook Page
The Carolina Panthers are 7-0. But here’s something to ponder: what if the undefeated NFC South team was actually ... 6-1?...
Do You Understand This Banner?
Poster - plane - banner. Sky - cloud - football. Nouns - sentence - words. Confusing - don’t - understand....
Jeb Bush Says He Didn't Smoke Weed With Bill Belichick
Clay Travis of Fox Sports had a conversation with Jeb Bush that I don’t care to know more about, other than the part where he asked Bush if he smoked weed with Bill Belichick in high school. So, Jeb, did you ever light one up with Belichick? Ever smoked on that gas? Waked and baked? Celebrated 4:20?...
An R.E.M. Song For Each 2016 Presidential Candidate
So Donald Trump took the stage at an anti-Iran-deal rally to the strains of R.E.M.’s “It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine),” and Michael Stipe got all salty about it, and, well, look out. You’re welcome....