stupid Page 18 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

What Gift Should You Buy From Jay Cutler And Kristin Cavallari's Wedding Registry?
American royalty Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari have finally announced a date for their upcoming wedding (It's July 13. Get excited!), and like any good soon-to-be-married couple, they've registered for gifts at Williams-Sonoma and Crate & Barrel. Thanks to some sleuthing from DNAinfo.com, we are...

Here, Have This Blake Griffin Subway Coupon That Expires Feb. 29
Fox Sports West, which broadcasts Clippers games, has a promotion deal with Subway. Any time Blake Griffin goes for a double-double, you can print out a coupon to get double the meat on your sandwiches the next day. Griffin sprung for 18 and 14 against Indiana last night, so it's Subway time. As tha...

Look At This Pathetic Baby's Terrible Shooting Form
This video has been making its way around the internet today, and everybody who watches it is like, "Awwww look at that precious little baby throwing balls into his little baby-sized basketball hoop. What a cute, talented baby that is!" Even those saps at Gawker got in on the act....

An Exclusive Interview With The Lady Who Owns The "@Pelicans" Twitter Handle
When news leaked out that the New Orleans Hornets would be changing their name to the Pelicans, each person online seemed to have an opinion. We at Deadspin endorsed it. Yahoo Answers did not. But everyone trying to think through the symbolism of the team's new name missed a more essential concern: ...

Which Harbaugh Brother Would Philandering Ladies Prefer To Hump? Who Cares, Let's Make Sex Jokes
It's the week before the Super Bowl, which means that our inbox is getting flooded with stupid press releases. One in particular, from someone affiliated with AshleyMadison.com (a website where married people can find other married people to bone), is very stupid but also attention-grabbing. The we...

Elvis Dumervil's Weight On The Planets
Elvis Dumervil, Pro Bowl defensive end, has great short-burst speed despite weighing 260 pounds, which is five pounds heavier than the more famous Elvis at the time of his death. In case you were wondering (and in case you were a Spy reader back in the day), here is Elvis Dumervil's weight throughou...

MLB.com Sells An NBA Headband For Cheaper Than NBA.com Does
Reader Zachary had a desire for an NBA logo headband, because he's cool like that. He looked it up at the NBA Store, and found it for $7.99. Then he found it at the MLB Shop, and it's a dollar cheaper. Why? We don't know. Why does MLB.com sell NBA stuff? We don't know....

Exclusive: Rick Fox Is Also Staying At Rex Ryan's Resort In The Bahamas
We've fought a nice little game of old-timey tabloid one-upsmanship with the New York Daily News this week. The NYDN broke the story on Wednesday that Rex Ryan had escaped from New York on a personal vacation. We countered with news of his whereabouts. The Daily News, for its part, dispatched a repo...

2012 Deadspin Hall Of Fame Nominee: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill
Has it really been close to two years since we first said hello, and a full 10 months since we had to say goodbye? We miss our old friend more than we can say....

Everything You Need To Know About New Browns Quarterback Thad "The Champ" Lewis
Per Mary Kay Cabot, Browns head coach until Monday Pat Shurmur announced today that third-string quarterback Thad Lewis would start against the Steelers in Week 17, as Brandon Weeden and Colt McCoy are terrible "dealing with injuries." Lewis will be the Browns' 18th starting quarterback since 1999,...

The Miami Heat Minority Owner Who Sued Google Because Of This Derpy Photo Is A Dick
The mug you see there belongs to Raanan Katz, minority owner of the Miami Heat, former Israeli basketball player, and real estate developer in Sunny Isles, Fla. He's into silly faces and frivolous lawsuits, and somehow he just got a court in Florida to walk all over the First Amendment....

College In South Carolina Hires Assistant Women's Lacrosse Coach Named Remington Steele
Remington Steele? Remington Steele!...

If You've Ever Wanted To Hear Ed Hochuli Talk About Buttocks, Today Is Your Day
We're surprised this doesn't happen more often, and maybe it does—but hearing popular NFL referee Ed Hochuli do it has a special flair. Hochuli's description of the results of a video replay in today's Bills-Colts game required his use of the word "buttocks"—you know the workout-obsessed ref wante...
![You Can See The Outline Of Some Dude's Dick On The Under Armour Wikipedia Page [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/185tv4oj67bpspng.png)
You Can See The Outline Of Some Dude's Dick On The Under Armour Wikipedia Page [UPDATE]
We could elaborate on the headline, but tipster Pat explained it well in his email. In his quest to find some legitimate information on Wikipedia, he ended up being sidetracked after discovering a picture of a guy in compression shorts, the outline of his dick clearly visible....

Rick Reilly's "I Had This First On Twitter": The Triumphal Dance Remix
When a live ESPN camera caught Rick Reilly ordering Stu Scott to credit Reilly's Twitter feed, it was an embarrassment for the former back-page Sports Illustrated writer. (Fellow panelist Steve Young was so disgusted he gives Reilly a "C'mon, man!" nudge.) We couldn't let it go with just the raw v...

Tim Lincecum Did Handstands And Puked At A New York Club, And Other Unconfirmed Athlete Stories From Yelp Reviews
Yelp is a helpful website if you want overly critical reviews of small businesses from people who have no other outlet through which to voice their long-winded frustration. After digging through some of the criticsm, however, Yelp is great for another purpose: finding weird stories about athletes. ...

Who Are The Computers Voting For? We Ask Siri And Others For Advice
I'm about to go vote, and I haven't read up much on the issues. I don't know which candidate loves America more or who has the bigger penis. So I asked the only objective sources I could find: computers. In case you're still on the fence, I've copied their advice below. ...

Deadspin I-Team: Who Was A-Rod's Dugout Wingman, And Who Was Attracted To Whom?
Yesterday we brought you the story of Kyna Treacy, the woman on whom Alex Rodriguez was allegedly macking during Game 1 of the ALCS. The New York Post reported on Tuesday that A-Rod, after being pulled from the game, spied Treacy and a friend in the stands and "had a ball boy toss the young women a ...