texas Page 56 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The One Where The Texas Rangers Inform Us Their Six-Shooters Are Not Whores
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

Your Early Game College Football Open Thread
Are you hoping those scrappy purple-clad kids from NW can somehow derail the mighty Iowa? You want Miami's Jacory Harris to say something silly to the UVA d-line? Can Central Florida not lose by 50 to Glandorf University? [LMK]...

Texas A&M Yell Leaders Aren't Doing Aggie Fans Any Favors
The A&M CheerYell Leaders fired up for the K-State game with a stunning rendition of "Ding Dong Song." (NSFW.) And put it on YouTube for some reason. They lost 62-14, but you can't really keep score on embarrassment. [SoYoked]...

Wake Up Deadspin/Open Thread: Oklahoma at Texas, Etc.
Greetings. Weed Against Speed here filling in on the weekend shift. We got a late start - I'll explain later. Consider this Wake Up, Deadspin as well as the Open Thread post for the early games. And away we go....

September: <em>Fin</em>.
We produce a lot of posts every month. Most of them disappear quickly. Some of them don't. Here are the 10 most popular posts from September, ranked low to high....

Couple Christens Dallas Cowboys Stadium's New Bathroom Stalls
Some of you who follow my infrequently updated Twitter account may have seen a report from a friend about a video of two people doing the North Texas rumpy-pump in the bathroom at the MNF game. It has arrived. (NSFW)...

<i>Now</i> College Football Season Can Begin
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Josh Hamilton Is Doing Just Fine Thank You
Hambone gives his first interview since, you know ... that. As you can imagine, ain't nothing gone break his stride or slow him down (oh no) and he's actually playing better than ever. So ... you're welcome?...

Evangelicals Forgive Josh Hamilton And Will Continue To Use Him As Spokesperson
"As a Christian, other Christians realize you are still going to make mistakes. But as a Christian, you learn from and get encouragement from other believers. They don't give up on you." [DMN]...

Jeremy Shockey Doesn't Play Well With Others
The Saints and Texans, bitter rivals from centuries past, got into a little intersquad donnybrook yesterday and America's second-most beloved tight-end was somewhere in the middle of it. Shocking, right? (Get it? 'Cause that's his name.)...

Chipper Jones' Death Ranch Claims Another Victim
A illegal immigrant was found dead on the Texas property owned by the Larry Jones family. (It's eight miles from the Rio Grande and 124 degrees. Do the math.) Unrelated: The Braves have hired new hitting coach Anton Chigurh. [Journal-Constitution]...

Punching A Crippled Child Will Not Get Your Soccer Ball Back
A 23-year-old woman in a dispute over a soccer ball with a wheelchair-bound 13-year-old boy at a children's hospital, slugged him right in the medical halo that was screwed into his skull. That's at least a yellow card, right? [DMN]...

Rangers Welcome Ivan Rodriguez Back Into Their Pudgy Arms
Houston puts the Rangers' old catcher on a bus to Arlington, receive two prospects in return, and Texas fans get a daily reminder that old age will someday leave them a broken shell of their former selves. [Dallas Morning News]...

The Hamiltons In Jesusland
Because we're all coastal elites here at Deadspin, we asked a Texas native to give us a sense of how the Josh Hamilton saga is unfolding in the Lone Star State. Piously, reports Jonanna Widner....

Josh Hamilton's Mentor: "I'd Be Shocked" If Photos Are Real
"I don't put a lot of credence in someone saying they have photographs of Josh in a bar," says Johnny Narron, a special assignment coach with the Rangers and Josh Hamilton's "accountability partner" since 2007....

Do Not Make C.J. Wilson Your ESPY Wingman
Texas Rangers reliever C.J. Wilson was at the ESPYs for some reason, but since he wasn't nominated for anything (one would assume) he decided to spend the evening busting horny dudes with his Twitter—including a certain noted sportscaster-lothario....

Longhorn Linebacker Blitzes Woman's Bedroom With His Car
All-Big 12 linebacker Sergio Kindle drove his car into an apartment building last week, and lacking any other options, left the car behind, ran home and went to bed....

Pistol-Wielding Old Man Would Like To Play Through
It is super annoying when you're out on the golf course and the group in front of you is playing very slowly, but I was not aware that I had a "moral obligation to destroy" these duffers with hollow-point bullets....

This Awful Woman Jinxed Them
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

High School Track Star Wins Team Championship By Herself
Bonnie Richardson isn't just on the high school track team, she is the track team. And even though she has no teammates, she somehow won the Texas Class A state championship by herself. For the second straight year....