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World Cup Profile: USA
Today, it's the turn of those lovely American chaps, who will be seriously attempting to urinate on England's chips during the group stages. But can they do it? And, more importantly, who ARE these people? Read on to find out…...
A Zany Video Of Fat Ronaldo Throughout The Years
Here at The Spoiler technology is king. So, as you can probably imagine, there are nifty little gadgets and terrifying gizmos all over the place. Even so, it was with a sharp intake of breath that the above video was first witnessed....
Footballer’s Snazzy House — Can You Guess The Owner?
For those of you wondering exactly what £100,000/week might buy you, then this should give you an idea....
Greatest Football Chants Of The Season REVEALED
Football fans love a good chant, and this season has heard plenty of them....
Messi Scores 47 Goals…And Here’s ALL Of Them!
And so Lionel Messi equaled a scoring record — held also by hamster-faced Ronaldo — by helping himself to another couple in yesterday's match. The internet beavers have since been working away, and above is some proof of their toil....
The Spoiler Prize For Best Individual Performance…
… Goes to… Lionel Messi! Yes, not long now until the season is totally over. Just a couple of minor cup competitions to wrap up....
Chelsea And Man City Use Mind Games To Tempt Torres
There will, of course, be much speculation over the summer as to where Fernando Torres might end up, and at the moment, the choices seem to be forking out in four directions....
Robinho And Pals Dance Merrily Along To Beyoncé
You know how sometimes on Jonathan Ross they will show a clip solely to embarrass a guest? Normally something humiliating from their past, like an old school play, or a silly advert? Good, you do. Well done....
Eggheads Explain How To Take The Perfect Penalty
Football is all about physics, so, in many ways, Wayne Rooney isn't just a footballer, he's also a magnificent scientist. It is also, unfortunately, marred by biology — the most annoying of the sciences — from time to time....
Drogba Performs His Second Greatest Ever Celebration…
Well done to the 75 per cent of Spoiler readers who correctly fingered Chelsea as the eventual Premier League winners....
Totti Absolutely Hoofs Balotelli, Gets Sent Off For His Trouble
Over in beautiful Italy, Mario Balotelli is a rather controversial figure — a bit like Marmite/Ashley Cole, they either love him, or hate him. Although, in most cases, they seem to hate him. Even his own fans....
Abbey Clancy Makes Her World Cup Prediction…
For those of you who prefer not to waste valuable shopping time reading up on the latest football relationships, Abbey Clancy is the lucky model who has long been on the receiving end of Peter Crouch's deep midnight kisses....
A Short Video About The Snazzy New World Cup Ball
Of course, when football was first invented, it was probably played using sheep bladders wrapped in velvet cloaks, or old fishermen skulls....
If Tevez Doesn’t Like It He Can Sod Off, Suggests Mancini
In political terms, the world of football closest in type to classic socialism. Everyone wears the same outfit, united in the one common goal, and no man is bigger than the club....
Look! It’s Some Wonderful England Goals On Video!
After spending the morning moaning about the state of the England team in the build up to the World Cup, it seems only right to look on the sunny side with a short video compilation of some great goals....
Barcelona Turn On Sprinklers To Dampen Inter Celebrations
Of course, the law dictates that you can't just shoot people in the face for getting on your nerves any more......
Chelsea Get Really Quite Greedy Against Stoke
Above are highlights from the Chelsea match — Man United fans might be wise to squeal and look away....
Bayern Win, But Things Get Even Worse For Ribery
Ribery had an absolute shocker, whilst Robben further proved that even if you look more like a telesales adviser than a footballer, sometimes it just doesn't matter....
Cristiano Ronaldo Scores A Beauty For Real Madrid
Ever since he cruelly turned his back on the Premier League for the paltry sum of £80million, hardly anyone over here gets to keep up with Cristiano Ronaldo's football progress. As it happens, he's still quite good....
England To Spend World Cup Build Up Sleeping In Tents
In a move commonly known as "the reverse Michael Jackson," England squad members will spend the build up to the World Cup sleeping in strange tents that have less oxygen in them than normal tents....