the Page 1018 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Patriots Need A Theme Song
Determined to ruin a good thing, the Boston Globe somehow decided that the Patriots need a theme song. The easy way to do this would be to search through Tom Brady's iTunes folder until something clicks (Huey Lewis and the News!), but no, the Globe is putting it up to a vote. Poems, slogans and Chri...

SHOTY First Round: Pac Man Jones Vs. Norby!
Every single SHOTY first-round matchup has been a blowout. We are not sure this will be any different; the Deadspin Planet is of one mind these days....

Theismann-Kimmel, BFF
Speaking of MNF ... We can't say our mouths were necessarily watering over a potential Jimmy Kimmel-Joe Theismann feud, but breathe easy, America: Theismann's not mad about Kimmel's crack about him on "Monday Night Football."...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured it's message boards this morning for its wittiest, hardest-hitting, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

The Winter Olympic Mascots Are ... Yeaagh! What The Hell? ...
Inspired by Native American tales of creatures that will claw children's eyes out if they don't behave, please welcome the new Winter Olympic mascots, Quatchi, Miga and Sumi! The Games are a mere 2 1/2 years from now, so these charming critters need to get right to work, doing, um, whatever it is th...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as for once you get your ducks in a row, and two are shot by Ted Nugent ... • College basketball: Georgia Tech at Indiana; Wisconsin at Duke. We'll find out which conference is better, once and for all (not really). [ESPN] • Minnesota at Florida State; Purdue at Clemson. Do not anger a...

SHOTY First Round: Sean Salisbury Vs. Rick Ankiel
After almost a week off, the 2007 SHOTY Tournament returns with a matchup of two very different human beings....

Zero Is The Loneliest Number
Gilbert Arenas will be lost to the Washington Wizards for three months. Official reason: knee surgery. But nowhere in the Wizards' press release will you find mention of Agent Zero's real disability. No amount of rehab will cure a broken heart. He writes about the breakup with his girlfriend on his ...

This Week In The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW, short for "The Sean Salisbury Wisdom," which tracks the consensus of the football punditocracy to ensure those triumphant declarations from Friday aren't flushed down the memory hole on...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after experiencing the joy and wonder of the holiday season ... • College basketball: Wake Forest at Iowa. Or as they call it there, a caucus. [ESPN2] • NFL: Miami at Pittsburgh. This would be something, it if were 1974. [ESPN] • NHL: Buffalo at Washington. Welcome to the Verizon Cente...

The Only English Coach For World Cup 2010
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....

The Stent Wars Are Heating Up
The Mighty MJD's Smorgasbord runs every Monday. Do enjoy....

It's Down to Three ... Uh, Right?!
Dan Shanoff writes a weekly college football column for Deadspin. Email him to let him know what you think....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while making a ridiculously complex origami CD case ... • NFL: Eagles at Patriots. The NE moneyline is about -86,000. Lay a $1. [NBC] • CBB: Arizona at Kansas. November Madness has never been madder. [ESPN] • Movie: Rocky III. Finally a reason to dust off that Thunderlips doll. [VS.]...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you go hypin' crazy ... • CFB: Missouri vs. Kansas. Put it up to twelve. Big 12. [ABC] • CFB: Clemson at South Carolina. My cock is game. [ESPN2] • Classic Boxing: 1983, Alexis Arguello vs. Aaron Pryor. Sick fight. [ESPNC]...

Tony Henry, Croatian Soccer Hero
Interpreting this post's title, one might assume that Tony Henry, pictured, scored the game-winning goal in Croatia's crucial Euro 2008 defeat of England. Nope. Tony Henry doesn't even play soccer. He's a British opera singer. And thanks to a small gaffe, a new Croatian hero....

Floyd Mayweather Knows How To Promote Fights To Heterosexuals
We're a couple of weeks away from Floyd Mayweather-Ricky Hatton fight, and, you know, it should be a good, as far as boxing goes these days. And the fight is no longer lacking the appropriate amount of hype. Why? Because Floyd Mayweather's war of words begins with anal rape....

About Last Night
What you missed while in a meat coma ... • College football: Trojans feast on Sun Devils, restore order to the the universe. USC 44, ASU 24. • NFL: Favre, Romo set up titanic match of 10-1 teams that a lot of people won't see. • College basketball: George Mason is back in the news, to Kansas State's...

SHOTY First Round: Gilbert Arenas Vs. Steely McBeam
It's SHOTY frenzy this week; two in two days. You now can spend your Thanksgiving playing around with online polls. Fun!...

We're At The End Of Our Rope
It's a sad day here at Deadspin World Headquarters, as the Talking Dennis Miller action figure was found hanged to death early this morning by the cleaning crew. Suicide is suspected, although I blame the cat. His last words were thought to have included a snarky insult of some sort, followed by an ...