the Page 846 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Fortunately, ESPN Doesn't Speak Spanish
Here's a sign sported by some enthusiastic Spaniards before yesterday's Euro 2012 semifinal between Spain and Portugal and aired on ESPN before the match. It reads, basically, "Cristiano go fuck yourself, Froilán the Golden Boot."...

Steven Soderbergh Whips It Out. <i>Magic Mike</i>, Reviewed.
As Steven Soderbergh gets closer to the retirement he swears will be happening next year, it's tempting for us who love his movies to wish he'd go out with one last major opus, some sort of legacy-defining masterpiece. So maybe that's why it's good that he clearly doesn't seem interested in doing an...

Raven Wanted To Rent <i>Buffy The Vampire Slayer</i>, And We Didn't Have It In Stock: More Wrestler Run-Ins
Inspired by the saga of "Wrestling Superstar Virgil," pro wrestling's saddest man, we continue with readers' encounters with the titans of the squared circle. If you've had your own run-in with wrestlers past or present, e-mail us, subject line "Virgilbag."...

Rob Ryan: Colorful Individual
Our favorite stadium reporter Jim Knox was at his best last night during the Tigers-Rangers matchup, locating Cowboys defensive coordinator Rob Ryan enjoying the ballgame. Ryan's choice of multicolored polo sans undershirt is the kind of bold wardrobe choice we've come to expect from the guy who dr...

What It's Like To Interview Abdullah The Butcher, Wrestling's "Monster Movie Come To Life"
Graeme Wood over at The Atlantic wrote about a recent in-person interview he did with Abdullah the Butcher, whose wrestling matches have long been famous orgies of blood. Wood's story is worth a read because he lets the details tell the tale:...

A Plush Bear Stuffed With Crap. <em>Ted</em>, Reviewed.
1. Of the myriad problems with Ted, Seth MacFarlane's flaming, masturbating fart of a comedy, the biggest one is that the teddy bear at its center is neither cute nor funny. The movie thinks he's both. For the movie's promising central joke to work—that a boy's teddy bear comes to life and then grow...

There Was An Entire Team Of Idiots On The Field At The College World Series Last Night
Arizona ended South Carolina's streak of College World Series championships with a 4-1 win last night in a game interrupted yet again by Idiots On The Field. It's the third time this CWS that there's been such a field invasion, and a team effort: an alleged seven fans ran out of the seats at once....

Omar Vizquel Busts A Move
The Blue Jays sat through a 2-hour rain delay in Boston, and Omar Vizquel is 45 years old. So...chalk these dance floor moves up to boredom, or just a little physical activity to keep those old joints from locking up?...

Now Batting, Travis Wood Of The Chicago Ubs
Cubs pitcher Travis Wood shut down the Mets in his seven innings of action last night, though the real impact he made was on viewers stupefied by his batting helmet's misplaced logo. The cap appears to have been through some severe trauma, made all the weirder because Wood, being a pitcher, has bat...

Dustin Pedroia Did Not React Well To Rumors Of Kevin Youkilis Being Traded
The Red Sox sent Kevin Youkilis packing yesterday, shipping the popular third baseman (and more than $5 million) to the White Sox for Brent Lillibridge and pitcher Zach Stewart. The news came as a shock to Boston second baseman Dustin Pedroia, who spent several innings with his face stuck in a stat...

Fellow Inmates Reportedly Sang "Hey, Teacher, Leave Those Kids Alone" To Jerry Sandusky
Following guilty verdicts on 45 of 48 counts, Jerry Sandusky was shipped off to Centre County Correctional Facility, the same facility he was initially held in December. According to a fellow inmate at the time, known only as Josh, Sandusky was on the receiving end of some a cappella ridiculing....

Sandusky Attorneys Wanted Off The Case On The Eve Of Trial
In the media whirlwind following the verdict, lawyerin' Joe Amendola said many things. Some were characteristically head-scratching, while others were relevant to the facts and preparation of the case....

DeMaurice Smith Wants The NFL To Re-Open The Saints Bounty Investigation
In a wonderful bit of passive aggressive sniping, DeMaurice Smith told Pro Football Talk Live he thinks the Saints bounty "investigators let the commissioner down." Smith is not necessarily saying Goodell is a terrible person, just that he made a terrible decision based on faulty evidence. Like Dre...

Jerry Sandusky's Attorney Keeps Right On Lawyerin', Possibly Violates Gag Order
It's been about 30 hours since the Jerry Sandusky case went to the jury. Because a decision can always come at any moment, lengthy deliberations are often a colossal bore for those involved. And now all that idle time waiting around may have gotten the best of Lawyerin' Joe Amendola, Jerry Sandusky'...

New Jersey Woman Sues Little Leaguer Who Hit Her In The Face With A Baseball
Elizabeth Lloyd was sitting at a picnic table near a fenced-in Little League bullpen watching her son play when she was struck in the face with a baseball. The culprit? A then-11-year-old bullpen catcher named Matthew Migliaccio who was warming up a pitcher....

Warren Sapp Says He's Not A Reporter, But He Is Willing To Fight Jeremy Shockey
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: After claiming Shockey was the Bountygate snitch, Sapp wants to clear some things up....

Meet Timur Bekmambetov, The Loony Madman Behind <em>Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter</em>
Timur Bekmambetov, the director of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, might be insane. I don't mean that as an insult. The man behind Night Watch, Day Watch, and Wanted isn't interested in nuance or character or plot or basic human emotions. Watching his movies, you get the sense that he doesn't spend...

LeBron James: World Champion Cocksucker
I know that last night was supposed to be LeBron James's face turn and that, while he warmly celebrates his first title with teammates and family, I'm supposed to see LeBron in a whole new light. Maybe he's not such a bad guy. Maybe this playoff run has brought out a depth of character heretofore un...

No, A Referee Did Not High-Five Erik Spoelstra During Last Night's Game
I counted more than 500 tweets alleging a referee high-fived Erik Spoelstra after a Mike Miller three-pointer to open the fourth quarter last night. That was only a few minutes afterward, so there've likely been another few hundred since. So let's set the record straight: there was no high-five. Th...

-8½. Woody Allen's <em>To Rome With Love</em>, Reviewed.
1. One of my favorite Roger Ebert quotes goes like this: "The Muse visits during the act of creation, not before. Don't wait for her. Start alone." That's to say: To create great work, you must first work. Not everything you create will be perfect; in fact, most of it won't be. But you can't wait fo...