the Page 895 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Bad Night In Newark, Redeemed By A Single Punch
NEWARK — The fights Saturday night were in Newark. Not in the actual stadium, the Prudential Center, but next door, in a big, boxy, white warehouse where the New Jersey Devils practice. The ice rink was covered with a green, turf-like carpet that wasn't quite sized properly, resulting in large carpe...

Man U Player Suffers "Horrific Injury That Cut To The Bone"
It wasn't quite Lawrence Taylor meets Joe Theismann's leg, but Manchester United's Nani suffered a pretty gnarly leg injury during today's 3-1 loss to Liverpool....

Six Degrees Of NBA Separation; Or, Why Buddha Is The Center Of The Basketball Universe
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard Sports Analysis Collective. Today: Connecting Blake Griffin and Charlie Parsley in eight easy steps....

Great Sportswriters Will Read Aloud In A Bar At Tonight's Varsity Letters
NYC folks: Gelf's Varsity Letters free reading series returns tonight, with wisdom and writing from John Eisenberg, Doug Merlino, and L. Jon Wertheim. Head to Le Poisson Rouge on Bleecker Street at 7:30. It will be le great. [Gelf Magazine]...

Undercut On Breakaway Dunk Leaves High Schooler Temporarily Paralyzed
Alex Etherington, a 6'5" small forward at Hamilton Heights High School in Indiana, had an open look at the basket just minutes into a game against Peru High on Saturday. The score was just 2-0, but a Peru player still attempted to stop Etherington's dunk attempt with a vicious undercut push from b...

Celtic V Rangers Madness — Everyone Goes Crazy!
El Hadji Diouf playing for Rangers against Celtic. What could go wrong?...

Bo The Bailer And His Ex Sara Were On Tosh.0 Last Night
Bo "the Bailer" Wyble and Sara Saco-Vertiz were the subject of a 6:28 "Web Redemption" segment on last night's Tosh.0. The "Foul Ball Couple" shared some lovely tidbits....

Deadspin Presents An Interpretive Rendering Of Cal Ripken Jr.'s Young Adult Book
We received an email from Cal Ripken Jr.'s publicity team at Random House, which will release his three-CD audiobook, HOTHEAD, next Tuesday. HOTHEAD (the caps are apparently intentional) is about a Babe Ruth League shortstop named Connor Sullivan and is "loosely based on challenges Ripken himself ...

Is The London Olympic Logo A Zionist Conspiracy, Or Is It Just Lisa Simpson Giving Bart A Blowjob?
There are two dominant conspiracies behind the London Olympics logo, which, if you ask Iranians and Simpsons enthusiasts, is trying suspiciously hard to be just ugly blocky numbers spelling out the year "2012." The Lisa Simpson and "Zion" theories, as well as a swastika interpretation, emerged whe...

Kendrick Perkins Will Not Win An Oscar For Pretending To Be Happy In OKC
God, that's heartbreaking, isn't it? Going from a title favorite, where you actually like all the guys on your team, to a talented-but-unready Thunder squad. Perk couldn't even fake a smile for the welcome-to-the-team photoshoot....

Newspaper That Once Libeled British Footballer Now Reports He Shot An Intern
Has Ashley Cole become to News Of The World what the Red Ryder carbine-action, two hundred shot Range Model air rifle was to Ralphie? Tempting. Teasing. Irresistible....

Oakland Man Just Wants Customized Raiders Leg Back
Oakland man Darryl Turner has had plenty of challenges in his life, losing his leg and paralyzing his arm in a motorcycle accident 25 years ago. He then spent the ensuing 25 years as a Raiders fan. And now someone's made off with his silver-and-black prosthesis....

Learn To Jog In Place With Phil Simms's 1987 NFL Workout Video
Phil Simms released this workout video in 1987, the year he was named Super Bowl MVP. It has lots of Lycra, big hair, and some help from pros Todd Christensen, Eric Dickerson, Tony Dorsett, Phil McConkey, Reggie Williams, Gary Anderson, and Rulon Jones. If by chance you still own a VHS player, you...

Pre-Mamba Kobe's High School Highlights, To The Tune Of "One Shining Moment"
Before Kobe Bryant was a five-time NBA champion with a shoe contract and a short film, he was just a regular high school kid who was documented by famous sports photographers on his way to class and who brought R&B stars to the prom. To remind us of that fact, someone from his alma mater, Lower Me...

Tiger Woods, Gone Fishin'
We were recently sent these photos of Tiger Woods in happier times. (These days, "happier times" just means "not golfing.") Just men being men, with no dames in sight, fly fishing with Mark O'Meara....

Wayne Gretzky Officially Has Better Hair Than Justin Bieber
The only part of this clip from today's episode of "The Talk" that's really worth watching is at the very beginning. The host asks for "somebody to help me out," as in, to make some noise, and a girl in the front row stands and holds her arm up in desperation; she's thinking she'll get to say some...

Carmelo Anthony Decided That New York Was The Place To "Bring My Talent"
In the Knicks' live press conference this afternoon, it took approximately two questions for Carmelo Anthony to explain that he had sat down with his family and made a "decision" (or a Decision?) to "bring [his] talent" to New York. He shall be known as LeCarmelo....

Australian Cameraman Braves Shark-Infested Water To Film A Shark Attacking A Marlin
A couple of Australians sailed out into the ocean to release a marlin back into the wild. That sounds like a nice story, right? Well, it would have been, if a giant shark hadn't come out of nowhere to rip the marlin to pieces in front of them and their cameraman, who was stuck in the water at the ...

Here's What The Dunk Contest Looks Like Without The Dumb Props
Raptors guard DeMar DeRozan says he is done competing in any "prop dunk contest" for NBA All-Star weekend. DeRozan finished third in Saturday's contest, and he lost out to Blake Griffin, who dunked over a car with a choir singing R. Kelly in the background, and JaVale McGee, who brought out an ext...

Child Blackhawk Reporter Has The World By Its Balls
Hiring cute children as on-air talent is no longer a meme. It's an affliction. The innocently invasive questions. The gnat-like attention spans. We should be sick of it. But, hell, this little feller the Chicago Blackhawks have working the locker room is still fairly adorable as he talks to player...