the Page 931 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Yes, Soccer Is Gay
According to this report, from America's finest news source. [Onion Sports Network]...

Americans Still Coming To Terms With The Rules Of Victory
This post, written by Josh Burt, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....

The One Where The Mets Get Started Early For USA-England
Continental Harbor Hotel, Baltimore, Md.: Saturday before the USA v England game in Baltimore. We tried to get them to come to Hooters with us to watch the game but they had to go to bp I assume — Darcy D....

Your Culturally Insensitive Weekend World Cup Goal Roundup (Video)
Last time around, we didn't have that many goals and thus only a few chances to express woeful ignorance about other countries' cultures. This time? Eleven goals over six games. So let's get stupid....

World Cup Open Thread: Netherlands-Denmark
Day 4 kicks off with The Flying Dutchpersons taking on the very punny Olsen's Eleven while people the world over incorrectly point out which country is which on a map. Follow the consonant-filled action below....

Vince Young Lead Suspect In Dallas Strip Club Assault
"Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young is the prime suspect in a Saturday night assault at a Dallas strip club that left an individual with bodily injury, an official with the Dallas Police Department said Sunday." [CBS Dallas via SecondStringFullback]...

ESPN Gives Clint Dempsey Unfortunate Nickname
So that was fun, huh? The U.S. played to a draw today thanks in large part to Robert Green's colossal cock-up. Green is expected to be Temple of Doom'd by Capello later this evening. Next up: Slovenia, lower TV ratings....

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup Of The Day (Video)
Two games today, two goals. Both of them in the first game. Bafana Bafana's Siphiwe Tshabalala knocked in a real beaut at the 55-minute mark, but Mexico's Rafael Marquez nailed the equalizer in the 79th. See, ties are fun....

Video Evidence That Maradona Still Knows How To Play
In amongst the fog created by the stone cold fact that, as a manager, Maradona is as mad as a box of oranges, it appears that everyone's forgotten that he used to be pretty handy with a football....

Walking Boner: The Story Of A Boy Who Hit Puberty At Age 9
"Do not, under any circumstances, ever leave your son alone with a girl. There could be serious consequences. A big complicated embarrassing mess that could affect his whole life. And yours. He can get a girl pregnant. "[The Good Men Project]...

MLB.com Is Just Full Of Porn: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....

Tim Donaghy On Game 4: Just What The League Needed
Tim Donaghy, the former NBA referee who spent 11 months in prison for relaying inside information to gamblers, is reviewing the performance of his former colleagues during the NBA Finals. Here's a quarter-by-quarter breakdown of Game 4, with accompanying video....

The 11 Most Dirty Players At World Cup 2010
Fantasy Football has exploded since moving off the newspapers and onto the Interwebs. Nowadays every office lunchbreak has someone boasting about their league ranking or furiously trying to work out a last minute transfer....

Austria Bans Zidane Head-Butt Adverts For Promoting Violence
Austrian telly chiefs have pulled a series of adverts showing people imitating Zinedine Zidane's infamous 2006 World Cup final attack on Marco Materazzi, claiming "they convey that violence can be used to solve conflicts"....

Tim Donaghy On Game 3: Just When You Thought It Couldn't Get Worse ...
Tim Donaghy, the former NBA referee who spent 11 months in prison for relaying inside information to gamblers, is reviewing the performance of his former colleagues during the NBA Finals. Here's a quarter-by-quarter breakdown of Game 3, with accompanying video....


Who should start for England against the USA?
Not long to go now, and still the debates are raging about who should line up for England in their first World Cup outing....

Angry, Fan-Punching Mexican Wrestler Of The Week: This Guy
A luchadore's mask is very important. You can understand why La Parka punched this fan who tried to unmask him. After the fight, La Parka returned to his ancestral home: the cover of that one Offspring album. H/T The Masked Man....

Tim Donaghy On The Refs In Game 2: What Star Treatment?
Tim Donaghy, the former NBA referee who spent 11 months in prison for relaying inside information to gamblers, is reviewing the performance of his former colleagues during the NBA Finals. Here's a quarter-by-quarter breakdown of Game 2, with accompanying video....

David Hirshey Is Your World Cup Historian, Not Your World Cup Closer
David Hirshey wrote regularly for this site about soccer for two years before selling us out to write a terrific book for ESPN. He talked to Emeritus about the book, the World Cup and mustaches....