the Page 934 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Masters Security Keeps Gallery Free Of Tiger's Unsavory Skanks
"Security guards at Augusta National were actually carrying around a sheet with the mug shots of Woods' alleged mistresses, with one of the guards asking a woman at the fifth hole, "Are you the stripper?" That's nice work, boys. [Star-Ledger]...
Last Night's Winner: Butler Haters
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Duke Blue Devils, who captured the hearts of basketball fans world-wide by finally stopping the merciless hoops juggernaut known as Butler....
More Like Chad OchoTANGO! Dancing With The Stars Live Blog
Sandwiched betwixt Opening Day and some type of basketball competition lies grown adults dancing for charity the hell of it. Bravissimo!...
Little Girl Cries Over Tweety Carter's Departure From Baylor. We've All Been There.
Via reader Ben comes this video of a 5-year-old girl who's incredibly, adorably distraught over the Baylor guard's approaching graduation. It is, I believe, the distilled essence of every Rivals.com message board in existence. [YouTube; somewhat related]...
Tailpipe: "... His Touch Sending Her Senses Into Overdrive"
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....
A Jersey Stitched For Two: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....
Dunker Kicks Defender In The Nuts, Hangs On Rim In Most Emasculating Facial Ever
Here's Tony Skinn, last seen on these shores helping George Mason to the Final Four, vaulting off some guy's coinpurse and dunking. Skinn, it seems, is no stranger to exploiting a man's pain threshold to attain basketball success. [TheHoopsDoctors.com]...
Annoying Flying Fish Slaps Woman In The Face
An influx of Asian carp to the Illinois River has given rise to extreme aerial bowfishing, a niche sport combining speedboats with archery. This is what happens when the fish fight back with some extreme aerial moves of their own....
Letter From Durham: Why You Shouldn't Hate Duke, And Why You Probably Will Anyway
The first game of Duke's season, against UNC-Greensboro on Nov. 13, was broadcast only on Fox Sports South, which meant that my friends up North had to wait another few days to get their initial glimpse of this year's team....
"Dead" Wrestler Of The Week: The Ultimate Warrior
Every week, the Masked Man, Deadspin's pro wrestling correspondent, honors the sport's fallen and examines their legacies — famous and obscure alike. Today: The Ultimate Warrior, who according to rumor died in 1991. This is an investigation into that "death." [Update, April 9, 2014: He's dead, accor...
Tiger Stands To Earn Someone Some Cash If He Keeps Up Infidelity
British bookmakers have set odds on whether Woods will "kiss an anonymous blonde" before stepping up to the first tee at Augusta. Photo unrelated, we hope. [AP]...
Your Ferocious Middle-School Volleyball Spike Of The Day
Volleyball Spike Gone Painfully Awry is an underrated sports blooper, frequently ignored while its cousin Football To The Groin is heaped with praise. Thankfully, this kid is here to give us all some perspective. [Today's Big Thing]...
Tevez Grabs A Hat-Trick As Expected!
Those who followed The Spoiler's advice by having a little Monday night flutter on the Tevez scoring slippers — you're welcome. Go and treat yourself. Above are the all the goals!...
Why Don't More Famous People Have AIDS?
I went to park my car the other day and the spot I parked in had a parking meter that was out of order. It is ILLEGAL to park in a spot with a meter that's out of order. You'll get a ticket. I cannot tell you how angry this makes me. It's not my fucking fault the meter is out of order. And now we ha...
Because It's On! Dancing With The Stars Week 2 Live Blog
Will Erin Andrews dance again with her lower half covered in silly string? Those who follow the live blog might find this out....
Pole-Dancing With Wolves
Their equipment? Five-inch pumps. Their field? A slippery 25-foot pole. Their mission? To wriggle and writhe along said 25-foot pole. These brave women are high-heeled gladiators in shorty-shorts. Step inside the 2009 East Coast Regional Pole Dancing Championships. [WithLeather]...
Ibrahimovic Plays A Very Literal Back Pass!
Those of you seduced by some cracking Premier League weekend matches probably didn't feel the need to bathe in continental football waters to get your thrills....
Allegedly Smart NASCAR Driver Is "Pretty Sure" The Moon Landing Was Faked
Quoth Ryan Newman, one-time mechanical engineering student at Purdue: "I watched the documentary on it, and it's pretty easy to believe. The flag was standing straight out when there's no wind up there." Your thoughts, Buzz Aldrin? [GN&R, via]...
Augusta's Chauvinism Enabled Tiger, Says Masters Rabble Rouser
Tiger Woods's return at the Masters is fitting, because it's the mentality at that all-male club that drove him to cheat on his wife with an endless parade of floozies. That's Martha Burk's take on it, anyway....