the Page 941 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Tebows' Super Bowl Ad Will Be Carried To Term, Apparently
CBS has approved a script for that 30-second spot Tim Tebow and his mom are doing for spanky Jim Dobson's Focus on the Family. It will not have an "overt" pro-life message, MediaDailyNews reports. Get out those decoder pins! [MediaDailyNews]...

Oh, Go F*ck Yourself, Curt Schilling
"They were up three games to none," Schilling tells Bryan Curtis, analogizing Massachusetts' special election to that one year when he had an owie on his foot, "and there was no possible way they were going to lose four straight."...

Mike Greenberg Is Not The First Man To Accidentally Say "Martin Luther Koon"
It turns out the former mayor of Selma, Ala., Joseph Smitherman, also accidentally slurred his words but he probably didn't get half the grief poor Greeny received yesterday....

Mike Greenberg Would Like To Clarify Something
"I would never say anything like that," Greeny says of today's little slip-up, "not in public, or in private, or in the silence of my own mind ..." The silence of my own mind. Beautiful....

Cum On Feel The Poise
Mark Sanchez threw for 100 yards and a pick yesterday, but he also managed not to light himself on fire or dance the hoochie coochie at midfield, so once again everyone has termed his performance — sigh — poised....

Mike Greenberg Celebrates MLK Day With Just About The Worst Slip Of The Tongue Imaginable
Video below. Um, whoops. [BlackSportsOnline, video by Ryan Fields]...

Today In Euphemizing Johnny Weir's Gayness: <em>Chicago Tribune</em>, ESPN, And Many More
An occasional series in which we document — and evaluate — the sports media's pained efforts to call the sexually undeclared figure skater gay without quite calling him gay....

A Children's Treasury Of Bizarre Injuries
The Sun-Sentinel has put online a database of more than 374,000 emergency room visits. We present some highlights from the worlds of sports, sex and...other....

Rabbi Phil Jackson Worries About Donald Sterling's Soul
"If you do a good mitzvah, maybe you can eliminate some of those things. Do you think that Sterling's done enough mitzvahs to eliminate some of those? How about all those other incidents that we have on file?" [LAT]...

Get Ready For Tebow's First And Only Super Bowl Appearance
A Christian right group has tapped the QB and his mother for a 30-second spot to air on the Super Bowl. The group's track record and the Tebows' story tell us that this ad will not be without controversy....

Poise To Men
Mark Sanchez went 12-for-15 and threw for 182 yards in his first playoff victory, and because at no point during the game did he chuck the ball into the Ohio or crap himself, he was deemed a model of poise....

Hennessy, Dog Crap, And A Touching Glimpse Into The Head And Home Of Ron Artest
"Dark Side of the Locker Room" is a compendium of journalists' bizarre, amusing and previously undocumented encounters with athletes (and often athletes' genitalia). Got a story? Send it to [email protected]....

Kurt Warner, The Great Unknowable Freak Of The NFL
Explaining their aversion to the epic, ridiculous Cardinals-Packers game Sunday, Free Darko wrote: "Warner scores don't move me. I know what he's thinking." I do not understand this. I have no idea what Warner's ever thinking. It scares me....

A Modern List Of People Who Eat People
Yes, we all know about Jeffrey Dahmer's voracious appetite for wayward boy meat, but there were plenty of others who partook. 1974 Uruguayan rugby team not included. [Mental Floss]...

Everybody Loves Kurt Warner...Except One Former California Pizza Kitchen Employee
Kurt Warner just can't stop winning over NFL fans with his sage quarterbacking and stock boy humbleness, so even if he doesn't make it to Canton we can all agree he's an exceptional human being, right? Behold a dissenter....

Today in TMZish Sports: J.J. Redick, Rachel Glandorf, Olivia Namath, Wes Welker, And The Almighty Beaver
These are some of the things that are happening in the nether regions of the sports gossip world. This news is not breaking. It is not exclusive. There are no exclamation points. We did not pay for these photos....

This Is Also Outstanding
DJ Steve Porter, creative genius behind "Press Hop," is back with "You Play To Win The Game," featuring the greatest hits of Herm Edwards, Denny Green and others, plus an autotuned Bill Parcells....

Fight's Off, At Least Until It's On Again
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

A Breakdown Of Sports Stars' Chances On "The Apprentice"
Some big names will be joining Donald Trump in the boardroom, and Deadspin isn't afraid to get service-y and give you the lowdown on which of the former athletic legends might show some acumen for entrepreneurship....

Mike Ditka Was Not A Fan Of Post-Game Interviews Or Pants
Behind the scenes post-game video, circa 1988, shows a young, spry Coach Ditka bickering with the host and generally being, well....Mike Ditka. Fascinating artifact. (Bad language, but thankfully no Mini Ditka revealed.) [Kap's Korner, via]...