the Page 971 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"Moneyball" Author Has A Small Penis, Cruel Family
"Daddy has a small penis!" That's according to his toddler daughter, who likes to let everyone at her day care center know that fact about her father. [NYP]...
Woman Loses Miss USA Competition By Being Unfairly Forced To Think
I was THIS close to winning my Miss USA office pool this year, but my choice to win it all, Miss California, choked like the Washington Nationals in the bottom of the ninth....
Name Of The Year: The Final Chapter
And so the sprawling Name of the Year competition is poised for its dramatic conclusion. Ladies and gentlemen, witness the championship showdown between Barkevious Mingo and Iris Macadangdang. [Name Of The Year]...
Montreal Canadiens To Feel The Power Of Celine Dion's Love
The Montreal Canadiens are for sale! And do you know who would be the perfect caretaker for this historically-gifted and beloved franchise? Canada's No. 1 shrew-like pop schmaltz siren!...
The Most Interesting Spring Football Game Commentary You'll Ever Hear
Radio station Rock 104 live-streamed the Southern Miss Golden Eagles game for its hometown fans on Saturday, but those tuning in received something else entirely: Hillbilly sex talk, belching, and the N-word....
Sidney Crosby Gets The Philadelphia Salute; Deadspin Almost Falls Apart
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Trailblazers, I Am Told, Are Often Misunderstood
Um so…did I mention I am also recovering from a sinus infection? How about a YouTube clip of children using obscene language?...
Breaking: Some Sports Franchises More Equal Than Others
"Don't get me wrong I love America," a reader writes. Whatever Wen Ho, think I don't get my fill of pinkos whining about Fox over at Torture Points Memo?...
You Should Wikipedia Kevin Garnett Sometime, He's A Fascinating Fellow
I actually did know who Kevin Garnett was before today. In fact, we talked one time. It was a conference call though, lacking in intimacy. Those were the days before you could Wikipedia helpful icebreakers....
Chances Are, You'll See This At The NFL Combine In 2010
Matthew Stafford's football-skeeting is pretty amazing. That's not supposed to sound pornographic. [Jimmy Fallon]...
'God Bless America' Guy Decides To Sue Yankees
Patriotism taken to horrifying extremes, or a rogue fan intent on mocking decent society? Yankees fan Bradford Campeau-Laurion has his side of the story, the cops have theirs. Now, a court will decide....
If Someone Hit For The Cycle And Nobody Saw It, Did It Make A Sound?
Only 17,539 were on hand in Arlington Stadium to witness Ian Kinsler become the fourth Texas Ranger to hit for the cycle in a 19-6 win over the Orioles. [NBCSports]...
AJ’s Deadspin Polygraph Test And Magic Panda Bears
We were scheduled to have a special guest from ESPN on this Deadcast, but they had to cancel. Which is good, because it allowed me to further indulge my passion for talking about elevator pissing....
Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: "The Big One"
Who knew a book about a fishing tournament could be so damn compelling? Journalist David Kinney goes inside Martha's Vineyard's annual Striped Bass and Bluefish Derby with his book, "The Big One"....
Isiah Thomas Is Florida International's Problem Now
Florida International stinks at basketball, so I guess they figured—if we're going to stink we might as well leave a spectacular stench all over the basketball world. That's the only explanation for hiring Isiah Thomas....
Isiah Thomas Is Never Going Away
Rumor has it that Florida International wants to has hired organizational wunderkind Isiah Thomas to be their new head basketball coach. Unbelievable. I guess FIU doesn't have a history department. [ESPN]...
Just One More Out
One of the saddest stories I ever heard was when Harry Kalas was denied the chance to call the Phillies 1980 World Series live due to NBC's broadcast restrictions....
Sergio Garcia Says Golf Is Hard!
After finishing 75 and 74 on the weekend, Garcia complained that the course is "too tricky" and not "fair" and something about mudballs in the fairway. Garcia was complaining before he even got to Augusta, he complained during the tournament and now he's complaining after, even trashing the sacred l...