the Page 985 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mom Allegedly Steals Daughter's Identity, Becomes 15-Year-Old Cheerleader
First, a note: GARRETT GUZMAN, YOU STAY RIGHT OUT OF THIS POST, MISTER. With that out of the way, let's discuss Miss Wendy Brown of Green Bay, WI. Her 15-year-old daughter lives with Wendy's own mother in Nevada for reasons that will readily become apparent. In an attempt to reclaim her own lost you...

Liverpool Stuns Manchester, Chelsea Wins Billionaire Boys Club Derby
Rafa Benitez has finally secured his first triumph over Manchester United in over six years with Liverpool's 2-1 victory this morning at Anfield. Despite surrendering an early goal, and playing without Fernando Torres, the home side pulled off the unexpected result on Ryan Babel's 77th minute game ...

Who Are Hugh?
I'm relatively new to the Hugh. I'm meeting Mr. Johnson for the first time today and hoping he'll be gentle. Clearly, Cal has not recovered from the loss of DeSean "Obama" Jackson and finds themselves trailing Maryland early. In the annual battle of teams that traditionally suck the most, Temple and...

Despite Concerns of 'Suicide' Talk, Vince Young Says He's 'Not Depressed'
The Vince Young saga rolls on as we head into week two of the NFL season. It went from Vince Young apparently refusing to go out on the field in the final moments of a game last weekend, to police frantically searching for him Monday night, to talk of Vince having uttered the word "suicide" while ha...

8 Most Interesting College Football Games of the Weekend
Sometimes choosing which college football games to watch is tough. Particularly since, unlike the NFL, the games kick off at odd hours, on odd stations, with odd match-ups. And there are so damn many of them. As college football has become more commoditized the top 2 or 3 games soak up 99% of the a...

Shawne Merriman Decides Playing With A Mangled Knee Might Not Be The Best Idea For A Long Career
“It felt good,” linebacker Shawne Merriman said of his left knee. “But with that adrenaline going, you never really know. Over the next couple of days, I'll assess how I feel. As of right now, I'm getting ready for Game 2.” That's what Shawne Merriman said Sunday, after the Chargers lost to the Caro...

Fox Sports: They Report, You Decide
Yeah, her character was pretty tough in Sin City, and Kurt Russell really regrets messing with her in Death Proof. But I doubt that Rosario Dawson is up to playing tight end in the NFL. Although I could be wrong, it's more likely that the guys in the Fox Sports production truck just got caught up in...

Dark Side Of The Locker Room: Stephon Marbury Is Puzzled By My Godlessness
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th) awful...

The Game Disembowels Bow Wow in $100k Madden Challenge
Playing with the New England Patriots against Bow Wow's Cincinnati Bengals (What?), The Game raced out to a 21-0 lead and cruised in for the 55-23 victory. I have to say I'm glad Bow Wow got his beatdown because Lil' Bow Wow stood up Deadspin. And by Deadspin, I mean me. After our post about the ga...

Rearranging the World Order
Michael Bertin writes about soccer for Deadspin World Cup qualifying in Europe is too easy. I know that sounds ridiculous given some of the results over the weekend—France losing to Austria, Italy needing stoppage time to nip Cyrpus, and England being rescued against Andorra (again) by five inspire...

Idaho Vandals Prefer Their Asses Logo Free
One week after debuting their new uniforms, the Idaho Vandals football team is changing their pants. It seems the logo, which was placed in an unfortunate position on the uniform, was a little embarassing. Athletic Director Rob Spear has ordered the logos removed. ...

Dickie V Steals the Show at the Basketball HOF Inductions
Hakeem Olajuwon, Patrick Ewing (really Patrick? shorts? did you forget to pick up your dry-cleaning?) and Pat Riley were inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame last night, along with their classmate Dick Vitale. Dickie V was, as usual, the star of the show. His passionate speech reminded everyone...

Rent a USC Song Girl for $150
The only catch is that you have to fill out a request form. Of course the form requires you to answer a few pressing questions. Such as, "What do you want the Song Girls to do?" I'm sure you can manage that. In fact, there's a good chance you were thinking of what you'd like the Song Girls to do, b...

Read Former Utah Jazz Center Mark Eaton's Screenplay: Riding the Bench
Everyone believes they have a screenplay in them. Your mom, your unemployed uncle, and anyone else who has ever watched a movie. Including 7'4 former Utah Jazz Center Mark Eaton. But most of these screenplays never see the light of day, which is fortunate. Not so with the first eight pages of Eaton...

Somewhere, Matt Leinart Is Smiling
Well, this is unfortunate. But it appears pseudonymous website proprietor "Nik Richie" of TheDirty.com was nabbed for a DUI last January and The Smoking Gun has the wince-worthy police report from the night of his arrest. Nik Richie is actually 29-year-old Hooman Karamian and, well, Jesus, let's go ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you figure out where the hell Rick Chandler ran off to.... • MLB: New York Yankees at Tampa Bay (7 p.m., EST): The reanimation of Carl Pavano continues as he attempts to win his third game in a row for the Yankees without having one of his body parts fall off on the mound. [ESPN]...

Floyd Mayweather Missing $7 Million In Jewelry After Robbery
Which is a real shame because Mayweather was using the $7 million in jewelry as a hedge against inflationary pressures brought on by the falling dollar and the continuing mortgage crisis. That or it was just sitting around in his house on the night of August 17th between 7 and 9 when it suddenly di...

Arms Race Gets Second and Larger Arm
Michael Bertin writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin Meet the new world power in soccer, the United Arab Emirates. Actually as people, they suck at the game. The national side is currently 104th (out of 208) in FIFA's World Rankings. But the Emirates have something more important than athletic ...

Just Don't Follow Him to Any Golden Clubs
You've got to give the kid credit: he does not shy away from insurmountable expectations. After following in his father's legendary footsteps at Georgetown, Patrick Ewing Jr., son of NBA Hall of Famer (scans NBA almanac) Patrick Ewing, is now a New York Knick. It's already Junior's third team, and h...

Aye Carumba! Chad Johnson Changes Last Name To Ocho Cinco
So Bengals wideout Chad Johnson has legally changed his name to "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco." Which I guess is only slightly better than "Chad Javon GoldenPalace.com." Chad expects to play in the Bengals' season opener, despite suffering a dislocated shoulder in the preseason and creating more needlework...