ti Page 1646 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Miracle On Ice Co-Opted For, What Else, A Presidential Campaign Ad
This week Tim Pawlenty launched his "American Comeback" campaign with an Iowa TV spot featuring the 1980 US Olympic Hockey team. Of course that means ABC's broadcast, which the Pawlenty team didn't get permission from ABC Sports to use (read: they didn't want to pay for it, and it's definitely not...

North Carolina Woman Left Paralyzed After Bachelorette-Party Accident Will Get Married Today
Last June, middle-school teacher Rachelle Friedman was preparing to get married. But then, a friend pushed her into a pool. Playfully. With no malice, Friedman says. She hit the bottom awkwardly, though, and the end result was that she was a quadriplegic....

Great, It's Gotten To The Point That Great White Sharks Are Jumping Into Our Boats
Off the coast of South Africa doing a shark count in Mossel Bay, members of an Ocean Research team were chumming the water in order to draw their numerical prey in. It wasn't long before an 1,100-pound, 10-foot great white took it upon itself to get airborne in a successful effort to go aboard the ...

Former Caddie Has Lost His Respect For Tiger Woods
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Steve Williams's first post-Tiger interview....

An Entire Section Of DC United Fans Planked At Last Night's Game
Well, planking just won't die. We thought it had, over the weekend. But maybe soccer fans based in DC don't watch morning news in Dallas....

Tiger Woods Dumps His Longtime Caddie, Magically Solves All His Problems
The guy formerly known as the best golfer on earth announced today — via his website — that he was kicking longtime caddie Stevie Williams to the curb. Hell has to response quote like a Tiger Woods sidekick scorned. To wit:...

Mork "Hunting Bait" Encino's Story Got The Taiwanese-Animation Treatment, Too
Will somebody — anybody — pony up $12,000 so we can find out what it's like to hunt a human being, win, lose or drawl?...

The Graceful, Oversized Legacy of Yao Ming
How long was Yao Ming going to last? That was the question about the seven-foot-six center long before he broke his foot for the first time in the NBA. When Yao joined the league nine summers ago, picked first overall in the 2002 draft by the Houston Rockets, he was the man who would bring the entir...

ESPN's Cringing, Persnickety, Condom-Obsessed Standards And Practices Manual, Presented Unabridged
Below you'll find ESPN's editorial and advertising guidelines as of 2010, sent to us by a tipster. They are the sort of guidelines one finds beneath coffee mugs at any typical media company: binder with laminated cover; nice paper stock; a general air of scolding, constipated didacticism that's like...

If You're An NFL QB, And You Post Your Wedding Registry Online, A Deadspin Reader Might Send You Shot Glasses
What magic this Internet has given us. Among this magic: online wedding registries for NFL quarterbacks, including Jeff Garcia, Alex Smith, and Tony Romo. Because it just has to mean something that Romo needs a cupcake carrier for his new, committed life....

Justin Abdelkader Would Bomb Michigan's Big House Off The Map If He Could
The Red Wings' Abdelkader, a former Spartan, took a ride with the Blue Angels in an F/A-18 Hornet. "We flew over Ann Arbor, went over the Big House – if we'd had had a couple bombs on it, maybe we would have dropped a couple on there." He's joking, we think. [Detroit Free Press]...

Hey, Kids: If You Sulk On TV, The Giants PR Team Will Reward You
In San Francisco, they make sure the kids develop a sense of entitlement at an early age....

The Metrodome Should Be Condemned
Last year, the Vikings replaced the turf at the Metrodome because the old stuff led to too many twisted ankles and torn ligaments. There was a whole to-do, and it went to court, and eventually they were allowed to bring in the new turf. It lasted all of one season....

Radio Broadcaster Who Looks Freakishly Like Tim Howard Bumps Into Tim Howard
According to Greg Matzek, Milwaukee-area radio personality on 620-WTMJ (an appropriate call sign, given most talk radio folks' penchant for gratuitous gab), he's been told hundreds of times that he looks like Tim Howard. He says he was confused for Tim Howard on the red carpet at the 2007 ESPYs—we b...

Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part V: Return To River Bend
We already posted your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this mother until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is nailed to a cross while dogs gnaw off its toes. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All...

Is Baseball To Blame For The Pathetic State Of Pie Throwing?
So some dope interrupted the Murdoch family's stammering and mumbling today by "throwing a pie" at Rupert Murdoch, which actually meant waving a styrofoam plate in Murdoch's direction as some sort of foam slid off it, till Mrs. Rupert Murdoch jumped up and clobbered the "pie" guy....

You Can Say "Circumcising Mosquitoes" On <em>PTI</em>, But You Can't Say It Thrice
The gentlemen on Pardon The Interruption exceeded the quota for the amount of times one can say some variation of the phrase "circumcising mosquitoes" on live television today. Cowlishaw, quoting (and imitating) Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, gets in two mentions, but Wilbon never gets his chance. The...

"Goodnight And Good Luck": Kevin-Costner-Owned Minor League Team's Announcer Quits On Air
Last week we brought you the peculiar odyssey of the Lake County Fielders, a minor league baseball club in Zion, Ill., owned in part by Kevin Costner. The Fielders' manager — former Blue Jays skipper Tim Johnson — resigned over team-wide pay disputes, many of its players refused to play, and the o...

Zubazpalooza > MC Hammer Bobblehead Night
The long-awaited MC Hammer bobblehead night finally arrived in Oakland yesterday, and it was rather exciting for everyone involved....

We Hope Everyone Is Prepared For The Roethlisberger Wedding
On Saturday, Big Ben settles down and becomes a one-woman man. The ceremony will be held in front of hundreds of the couple's closest friends (they will be checking IDs, so don't try anything funny or Benjamin Braddock-y) at Roethlisberger's church in suburban Pittsburgh. If you know anyone who live...