ti Page 1764 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Massachusetts Has Exactly 1500 Celtics Fans
The Celtics license plate finally hit the magic number of orders to be produced. All it took was three years and a title to find the 1500 people necessary....

Poon For Everybody!
Missouri fans who made the trip to Manhattan, Kansas to watch their Tigers trash Kansas State 38-12 decided to honor the team's victory by holding up letters to spell out "POON." Although I'm a bit confused by the extraneous "O."...

Timberwolves GM Wants Fans To Know He Is Aware Of How Much Team Sucks
Mired in a nine-game slide, the Timberwolves are struggling to get acclimated to Kurt Rambis' triangle offense. Further, the team stinks. So, GM David Kahn did the only sensible thing - he wrote a letter to the team's 10 fans....

This Guy Is Trying To Steal John Daly's Bit
And no, I'm not referring to Udorn Duangdecha getting his stomach stapled and surviving solely on Diet Coke and cigarettes - check out those slacks. Crap, they're so loud that Marlee Matlin heard him trying them on. [Devil Ball Golf]...

Your Late Afternoon College Football Viewing Open Thread
It's time for the second round of games on this wonderful Saturday afternoon. There's plenty of options on the telly, with Florida at South Carolina as perhaps the most intriguing. Can you imagine how excited these girls are right now?...

Chad Ochocinco Fined Veinte Mil Dólares By Liga Nacional de Fútbol Americano
¡Ay, caramba! Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver/prop comic Chad Ochocinco has been fined $20,000 by the NFL for jokingly attempting to bribe an official with a dollar bill during last Sunday's game against the Baltimore Ravens....

And Now A Selection From Tim McCarver's "Great American Songbook" Remixed
During the MLB playoffs, Fox baseball analyst extraordinaire Tim McCarver released a CD of him crooning through jaunty Cole Porter-style songs without a smidge of irony. We had grand plans for this. Some fell through, but one miraculously worked out....

A Grim Look At Tim Tebow's Future?
Buried in a flimsy trend story about the, er....resurrection of "John 3:16" madness (courtesy of YouKnowWho, natch) is a more fascinating nugget about the true originator of the craze—who is serving three life terms in a California prison....

Derek Jeter Has Really Let Himself Go Since...Last Wednesday
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

NFL Mercifully Ends Stupidest Product Placement Ever
Philly's Brent Celek was fined 15 yards for an idiotic TD celebration Sunday, when he raised his right leg just like the doofuses in those Captain Morgan commercials. And yep, the awful rum maker was behind the whole thing....

Brave Peacemaker Of Casino Cafeteria Chair-Throwing Lady Brawl Rewarded With NBA Assistant Job
Yes, Tim Floyd, has been hired to be part of the Charlotte Hornets staff after the firing of head coach Byron Scott. GM Jeff Bower is now head coach. [Yahoo!]...

No One Likes Donald Sterling, Part 783 (UPDATE)
The league has no plans to discipline, comment on or even cough pointedly in the direction of Sterling, so activists are passing around a protest petition that David Stern can blithely ignore, too. Faaantastic!...

Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: <em>The Art Of A Beautiful Game</em>
Today's comes from Sports Illustrated's ever-excellent Chris Ballard, author of The Art of a Beautiful Game: The Thinking Fan's Tour of the NBA. Here's Chris on Kobe Bryant, basketball nerd. Chat with him at 1 p.m. in a followup post....

A Little Holier-Than-Thou From Someone Who Handles Pigskin Every Week, Don't You Think?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Become America's Healthiest Individual at Equinox Fitness Club
You walk by them all the time—the sleek, state-of-the-art gyms featuring buffed-out dudes doing their thing on the ellipticals. Join Equinox and stave off the winter fat you know is coming. Click here to redeem your 3-day pass!...

This Is <em>Exactly</em> What It Looks Like
U.S. Marshals will be auctioning off Bernie Madoff's customized Mets jacket. So you can doubly pretend to make tons of money but fail in the end anyway. [Gaston & Sheehan Auctioneers]...

More High School Sports Titles Decided By Technicalities
A Kansas gymnastics team was docked one point at the state championship meet—enough to drop them from first to third in the final standings—because their coach made an "illegal inquiry." She asked was the score was....

You Better Learn To Recognize Michigan's AD, Honey
Since picking on Rich Rodriguez has become a little too easy lately, here's a new plotline for Michigan mockers to pursue....athletic director Bill Martin reduced to pulling the "Do you know who I am?" routine in his own stadium....

The Clemson Women's Rowing Team About To Become Famous For All The Wrong Reasons
And that's...start again. And there's...no. Sigh. These poor girls. Nice win at the Hooch, though! [ClemsonTigers.cstv]...

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Refreshed And Resurrected Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....