ti Page 1769 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Your Food/Finance/Heavy Construction Metaphor Of The Day
"[W]hen a team gets on a postseason roll, it usually produces a steamroller effect. Sometimes the roll goes stale, but if you get a fast bite after it leaves the oven, it still tastes good and pays dividends." [NYDailyNews.com]...

Ryan Leaf Used To Be Carried In The Arms Of Cheerleaders. Part 87
New blue blood/great white hope, Ryan Leaf has finally kicked his silly vicodin addiction and is busy starting his life over (again) in "environmentally soothing" Vancouver, B.C. He says he's finally found the cause of his personal problems — football....

Florida Gymnast Lets Boyfriend Turn Her Apartment Into Weapons Cache
A University of Florida gymnast was arrested yesterday after police discovered "a safe, nine shotguns or rifles and two computers" in her apartment, all of which were stolen by her totally awesome boyfriend....

Jackie Robinson A Republican Hero, Say Republicans
One of the most asked questions we here at Deadspin get is "If Jackie Robinson were alive today, how would he vote?" Well, someone's offered an answer....

A Manly Manly Way For The Titans To Bust Their Slump
According to a not nearly tongue-in-cheek enough column in The Tennessean, the only thing that can turn around the winless Titans is a Cuddle Party in their pajamas. I'd be shocked if this wasn't ghostwritten by Vince Young. [Tennessean]...

The Learning Curve: A Giant In Redskin Country
This segment is called "The Learning Curve" where you, young blog proprietor, will get a link to your new site on Deadspin. Any and all questions you may have about being a successful blogger will (hopefully) be answered....

Delighting In Rick Reilly®'s Massively Wrong Broncos Predictions
Reilly® has written many nasty things about "Boy Blunder" Josh McDaniels and the Broncos, presumably because the latter hired the former to replace his tandem-bike partner, Mike Shanahan. Now that Reilly's 4-12 prediction is a mathematical impossibility, let us revisit....

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Touching The Hem Of His Garment Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

When The Bands Are More Competitive Than The Football Teams
The epic Grambling State and Prairie View rivalry was taken to absurd new heights last week, as each team's marching band attempted to disrupt the other team's offense. Seriously, this is the most exciting story on SWAC football in years....

Your Early Games Open Thread
So what if the Giants are forced to resort to their second string QB? The Raiders have to resort to their first-stringer. Enjoy watching the Oakland game, America. You poor bastards. [The506]...

Tim Tebow Lives!
His headache is gone so the big guy will likely play tonight against LSU. Will he start or arrive by parachute in the fourth quarter for added chills? [Times-Union]...

Run For Your Life At The Baltimore Marathon!
Today's Baltimore Marathon route passed with one block of 13 different crime scenes where city residents were murdered in 2009. Alphonce Yatich from Kenya and Iulia Arkhipova from Kyrgyzstan were the only survivors. [Baltimore Sun via Bob's Blitz]...

Was This A Missed Field Goal?
Cleveland Browns defensive coordinator Rob Ryan is making a big, passive-aggressive stink about the 31-yard kick you see here, the Bengals' game-winner over the Browns on Sunday. Alleged game-winner....

The One Where Jared Allen Shows He Can Croon
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

Of WAGs And Witchcraft
A Spanish "witch" came forward to say he was paid to put a curse on Cristiano Ronaldo, causing his recent ankle injury. Suspect number one in the Spanish press: a jilted Paris Hilton. [Sport]...

White Trash Rebels Fans Would Like To See This Man Dead Over White Trash Comments
The SEC is littered with pugnacious rivalries, and one Bama'-banged Zabka named Taylor Fortenberry created his usual trash-talk video before this week's Ole Miss clash. Unfortunately, now Ole Miss fans want to kill him. Dead. For real....

The Nationals Should Give This Guy Season Tickets For Life
Great story from Captain Steinberg, still exiled in Bogville, about a Nationals fan who saw 19 home games for D.C.'s awful baseball team this year — and they managed to lose every single one of them....

George Lopez Is This Year's Frank Caliendo
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Would-Be Thugs Pick On The Wrong Crossdressers (UPDATED WITH VIDEO)
Next time you try to beat up a couple of women, make sure they're not men in drag. And also MMA fighters....

Alabama Father Pleased Daughter's Domestic Dispute Won't Interfere With Football Season
Alabama linebacker Courtney Upshaw and his girlfriend both agreed to dismiss charges filed against the other after a lover's spat this summer. No one is more excited about this than the girl's father who exited the courthouse shouting, "Roll Tide!"...