ti Page 1929 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
That Gripping AFC West
We will confess, we did not watch the Monday Night Football game last night; we had a concert, the Illini were on and, frankly, we're gonna get enough football in the coming days. But we take solace in knowing there's a division worst than the Buzzsaw's NFC West....
In A Year, He'll Invade And Occupy Columbus, Georgia
Nick Saban was supposed to be the savior for Alabama football — and hey, the Dolphins sure have taken off since he left — but the team has collapsed down the stretch, losing their last three games, including last week's home loss to Louisiana-Monroe. Fortunately, Saban has been able to keep the loss...
Sure, He's, Uh, Doing Some Bobcats Scouting
We were busy at this show tonight, so we're late on the uptake, but we will say this: We don't think we'll ever get used to seeing Michael Jordan wearing Illini colors. We wonder if Tar Heels fans will ever get used to it either....
Here We Are, Back In Denver Again
Jeez, didn't Denver just host a "Monday Night Football" game? That's right, they did, just three weeks ago, in the game when Brett Favre made everyone all weepy again. We thought we remember that....
Ron Zook Continues To Piss Intensity
After Illinois' oddly easy win over Northwestern — to win the Sweet Sioux Tomahawk, whatever that is — on Saturday, the most amazing Illini season we can remember draws to a close. Which means, of course ... it's time for the Ron Zook Water Skiing Photo! The man pisses intensity....
Michigan Bids Adieu To Lloyd Carr
It's official: Several Michigan players went to visit Lloyd Carr in his cage on Sunday and it turns out that the only reason he had been standing up at all is that he had been nailed there. Yes, Carr is an ex-parrot. (And Brian Cook had it first, by the way, despite what "ESPN has learned.") Say wha...
We Have To Ask
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SporsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Scouts Inc. on NFL losers: Oh bouncing field goal attempt, you are so like life itself. Where will you eventually land? • 12:30 p.m. Did Madden actually say "Tom Brady is playing the best football of any quarterback ever"? And d...
The Celtics Are No Longer Unstoppable
Forgive us, but we wouldn't help but take a tiny, mostly unjustifiable iota of joy from the Celtics' first loss last night to Orlando. We enjoy watching the Celtics play, don't get us wrong, but seriously: It was nice to see a Boston team finally lose a game....
I'm That Mountain Peak Up High
• The best signs from Saturday's edition of Gameday. [Football Jesus Las Vegas] • Nick Young's first leap towards the Dunk Contest. [Mister Irrelevant] • Willie Randolph looks back. [The Mets Are Better Than Sex] • In case you weren't aware or didn't just see it coming, Donovan McNabb is hurt again....
I'm That Mountain Peak Up High
• The best signs from Saturday's edition of Gameday. [Football Jesus Las Vegas] • Nick Young's first leap towards the Dunk Contest. [Mister Irrelevant] • Willie Randolph looks back. [The Mets Are Better Than Sex] • In case you weren't aware or didn't just see it coming, Donovan McNabb is hurt again....
Coach Cal Defeats Coach Calhoun, Cancer
Both Derrick Rose and Chris Douglas-Roberts notched career highs in scoring en route to Memphis's 81-70 win over Connecticut in the finals of the 2K Sports College Hoops Classic benefiting Coaches Versus Cancer. Douglas-Roberts led the way with 33 points to put away Jim Calhoun's Huskies in the se...
Did you know that Hugh V was the Duke of Burgundy? Well maybe if you'd gone to Duke you would have. In other news, Duke fans are actually going to be pissed if they lose to Notre Dame today. Wait, does Duke have football fans? Are you one of them and would you care to comment? Well here's your chanc...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch when not even Subserviant Chicken will obey your requests ... • College football: Hawaii at Nevada. Honolulu and Reno ... practically identical in every way. [ESPN2] • College basketball: 2K Sports College Hoops Classic, at New York, third-place game; Championship game (Memphis vs. UCo...
Everybody Keep Piling On Notre Dame!
As we come to the final death spasms of the glory/hideousness of the Notre Dame season, we stop to do a brief dance on the Irish grave. How bad has it become? Freaking Duke thinks it has a chance to win in South Bend this weekend....
The Last Chapter Of The Aubrey Huff Saga
Just to wrap up this whole Aubrey Huff and naked people business (NSFW), here's one last shot, of everybody's favorite porny Oriole, with the charming Melissa Midwest (also NSFW). Godspeed, Mr. Huff: We bet now, even you can find some place to party in Baltimore after 9 p.m....
We Have To Ask
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Injury report with Stephiana Bell: It hurts so badly when you deny our love. Won't you make the pain go away? • Noon. MLB with Jerry Crasnick: How much are season tickets to the Bonds trial? • 3 p.m. NASCAR with David Newton: I...
Perhaps Everybody Should Cool It A Bit On The Celtics
We don't mean to mess with the big happy hot story in the NBA right now ... but seriously, shouldn't we slow down on this Celtics business?...
How Hillary Is Like Grandmama
There's another one of those presidential debates tonight — this one's the Democrats, their 592th — and as that race starts to veer toward the more interesting, MSNBC brings up a fun parallel: The candidates are just like early '90s basketball teams....
We Have To Ask
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. Baseball insider Keith Law: More embarrassing firing ... Ari Gold by Vinnie Chase, or Scott Boras by A-Rod? • 2 p.m. SportsNation on ESPN radio: Could you play something by Travis Tritt? • 3 p.m. NHL analyst Barry Melrose: That ...