ti Page 1949 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tigers Burned Again
We generally don't condone vandalism, especially when it involves college students and fire. But you have to admit that these Auburn football fans, from last year's game between Auburn and Arkansas, were pretty much asking for it....
Our Teams: A Requiem In Three Acts
I. So now it can be written and known: The spinning, sprinting 12-yard sideaways rugby punts are not, in fact, a device that has come to revolutionize the sport of football. Sorry, Coach Zook. Our Illini very well might be the worst team in Division I-A, and we see no reason they wouldn't lose to Ne...
If Only He'd Have Gone Another Week!
This man's name is Fraser Babineaux, and for the last year, he has been known around these here Internets as "LSUOverUSC," a guy absolutely obsessed with proving LSU deserved the national title over USC in 2003. His site is a case study in how the Internet can drive one mad; it is so niche and so si...
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 2 p.m. MLB with Buster Olney: Hey, I just received my Pete Rose autographed ball in the mail, and all he did was draw a middle finger on it. • 3 p.m. NCAA FB w/Mark Schlabach: Rutgers in top 25? Wasn't the Scarlet Knight the one who go...
New Looks For D-Backs, Reds
What to do if your team struggles late and is unable to sneak into the playoffs after a somewhat surprising season? Change your logo, of coruse....
The Closer: Tigers Welcome The 21st Century
Notes from a day in baseball:...
Fox's Sense Of Humor Superior To That Of ESPN
I haven't made fun of Tim McCarver nearly as much I should, recently. I offer this as an apology, and I applaud the Fox network for letting it go. Some other networks seem to have a problem with poking fun at themselves....
Johnny Damon, Grabbing Himself And Having Sex
Johnny Damon beats off in centerfield. At least, I think that's what she's saying. And you know, she doesn't seem repulsed by the idea... not enough to follow Damon home and mess with his war veteran father, anyway....
We Suck At Everything, Apparently
I realize that golf isn't that big of a deal here at Deadspin, unless Tiger Woods is whiffing on an awkward high-five, or Phil Mickelson is choking away a tournament on the 72nd hole. But the Ryder Cup is one of the few events in sports when the competitors involved care about the outcome as much as...
Does This Mean Jay-Z Has To Rename His Club?
Forty. Forty. Forty. There was a time in the not-too-distant past when seeing that word three times in a row would mean that I had 120 ounces of this garbage coursing through my veins. Today, however, it represents the remarkable accomplishment of Alfonso Soriano, becoming the first ever member of t...
That, Friends, Is A Lot Of Funk
In a world of uncertainty, the dancing fat man is a distinct pleasure worth cherishing. Do not underestimate the dancing fat Clemson fan: He's, in fact, quite nimble. You might think it cheap and/or easy, but we value the fundamental certainty of gyrating flab, and we think you probably should too....
Cultural Oddsmaker: The Irish Menace Of The Ryder Cup
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to say hi....
Must Be Sittin' In The Front Row!
Earlier this week, we heard rumors of a fan and his girlfriend / wife / mistress / crossdresser, while in the top level of the mostly empty RFK Stadium, uh, enjoying themselves in a way that you can't exactly enjoy yourself in the crowded Yankee Stadium bleachers. We weren't going to run anything ab...
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Contender's Steve Forbes: Did Stallone show up on the set even once? (Frank Stallone doesn't count). • 3 p.m. FFB Injuries with Will Carroll: I think if I bench Kevin Jones this week, it will inspire him to play harder for my tea...
"The Orioles Are Not An Asbestos Lawsuit!"
So the big Orioles protest went down yesterday, and, on the whole, the organizers — disappointingly, a radio station — have to be pleased with the coverage. "SportsCenter" had a short segment on the "Free The Birds" business, though The Washington Post is oddly muted in the paper this morning....
"Game Of Shadows" Authors - Respect - Work Ethic - Investigative Skills - Actual Threat Of Jail + Douchebaggery = Mariotti!
It was with considerable amusement that we read Jay Mariotti's column in the Chicago Sun-Times today. (Yes, yes, Jay, by writing about you, we're just making you more famous. It is our curse!)...
Only Fake Porn Can Make The Ryder Cup Worthwhile
We're not really sure why we're supposed to care about the Ryder Cup. First off, it's golf: It's the furthest thing from a team sport, and no matter how hard they try to convince us that we're rooting for "America," it's hard to inspire enthusiasm to root for the home country to avoid the bunkers wh...
Get Down To Camden To, Like, Protest And Stuff
Somewhere near Camden Yards, right now, there is a lonely protestor, looking for his or her fellow protestors, hoping he or she doesn't make a wrong turn. It is Baltimore, after all....
Chad Johnson, Perhaps Unaware Of His Surroundings
So remember that hit Chad Johnson took at the end of the Bengals-Browns game last week? Well, over at The Fanhouse, the omnipotent Mighty MJD found the video of Johnson's postgame "discussion" with reporters. We think maybe he wasn't quite ready for an interview yet....
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Ryder Cup with Jason Sobel: Hmm. I guess everyone had to start somewhere, huh? • 2 p.m. MLS with Marcelo Balboa: Rocky's less-famous younger brother. • 4 p.m. Football Scientist KC Joyner: Damn you! Why didn't you warn the Sain...