ties Page 30 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Self-Proclaimed Jersey-Chasers Bring UNC Hoopsters To Sorority Formal, Warn Sisters First
Last night was Spring Formal for the UNC-Chapel Hill chapter of the Chi Omega sorority. And three of the lovely ladies landed as dates three of the members of the basketball team: Harrison Barnes, John Henson and Kendall Marshall....

Ken Rosenthal Will Wear A Bow Tie All Year
We generally appreciate Rosenthal, even if he does on occasion throw some shit at the wall. We're therefore delighted to see he'll be making the bow tie a permanent addition to the wardrobe, at least for this season. And it's for a good cause....

Soccer Match On Field Surrounded By Barbed Wire Unpredictably Marred By "Absurd Violence"
To some, this may look like referee Augusto Vego getting attacked by unhappy Río Segundo players in their lower-tier Argentine match with Sportivo Club....

Update: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is Now $118.01
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services....

We Have The Surprisingly Cock-Obsessed Pilot For Mark Schlereth's Sitcom
CBS has ordered a pilot for Home Game, a sitcom about Mark Schlereth, ESPN analyst and former Broncos/Redskins guard. Why? It's unclear....

Rick Reilly Rips Off Rick Reilly ... Again
You have to wonder about the return on investment for Rick Reilly. ESPN pays Reilly millions to squeeze out meconium-scented goo like this piece on the Caltech basketball team. You could literally automate this kind of hackwork. And Reilly often does....

Breaking: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is $88.61 This Month
Sometimes we get wonderful tips, about corked bats or team finances. Other times we get sent former journeyman outfielder Oddibe McDowell's water bill in Broward County....

Cassy Herkelman Is The Bigger Person In The 112-Pound Weight Class
This week, a God-fearin' home-schooled young man named Joel Northrup refused to face Cassy Herkelman in the ring because his faith doesn't allow men wrasslin' ladies. In a statement issued by his host school (because public high school athletic departments in Iowa have public relations experts?), No...

Joba Chamberlain's Fatness Goes Down The Memory Hole
This morning's conventional wisdom: "Joba's out of shape." Headline just posted on Yankees.com: "Added muscle has Joba Chamberlain eager to throw."...

We Have The Awful Pilot For Colin Cowherd's Awful TV Show
A tipster has sent along the script for the first episode of Colin Cowherd's "relationship" sitcom, which is being developed for CBS and which is roughly The Honeymooners meets Frasier meets the really insightful parts of Bedtime for Bonzo. Here are some highlights....

The Super Bowl Week Orgy, Through The Eyes Of An NFL Player
Every player in the NFL can buy two Super Bowl tickets at face value, if he so chooses. All he has to do is contact his club's ticket guy and arrange for the pickup. Some teams require rookies and second-year players to pick up the tickets at a location in the host city. Presumably, this policy is i...

A Horrifying Selection Of Port-A-Potty Sex Stories
What's it like to make love to a drunken stranger in an outdoor waste box? Some readers have an answer....

What The Hell Happened To Keith Tkachuk?
One of the greatest American-born hockey players ever, Tkachuk was never known as a svelte dude. But just eight months after retirement, he's looking like he still wears his pads under his dress shirt....

Lady Hates Michigan So Much She Lets Her Breastuses Hang Out
Ladies and gentlemen, meet the Mirror Lake Queen. She likes Woody Hayes a lot. You can see a still at bustedcoverage.com but I feel as if live-action really captures her true spirit....

This Sorority Gal Did Not Take South Carolina's Loss Well
Bad to worse: first the Gamecocks lost to Kentucky last month. Then she gets a camera shoved in her crying face. Now she's (Internet) famous for it....

Not A Good Weekend For Ankles And Legs In The Premier League
This post, written by Richard Gilzene, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....

Wayne Rooney Is Not An Animal. Wayne Rooney Is A Human Being.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Let's See What Happens When A Baltimore Oriole Meets A Flight Attendant
And now, a feel-good post to close the day....

The One Where A Lady Sends Us Pictures Of Her Boobs In The Hope Of Getting A Job (NSFW)
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. If you're new, read this to figure out what we do here. If not, well, let's get down to business. (NSFW)...

Hey, Please Thank Fire Joe Morgan Again For Making Yesterday Wonderful
Remember how much fun you had yesterday watching Fire Joe Morgan eviscerate all of those poor, poor sports journalists? Yeah, if you could help them help people with cancer, it'd be much appreciated....