tiger Page 70 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Hey, More Realignment Rumors. Awesome.
Oh no, we're not done. The Texas League may have settled their little dust up, but Crazy Conference Chatter is not over. The Pac-11 still needs a 12th man and the Big East will apparently take whatever they can get....

The Self-Identified Tiger Woods Babymamas Come Out Of The Woodwork
Devon James now says a 2006 threesome wasn't her first encounter with Woods, and, in fact, he's the father of her nine-year-old son. This is the type of thing she should have mentioned earlier, back when we actually cared. [NYDN]...

FedEx: When You Absolutely, Positively Need Your Son's Team To Play In A BCS Conference
Memphis, stricken by Realignment Fever, is trying to negotiate their way into a bigger conference or, failing that, find a wealthy benefactor to buy them one. Thankfully, they (and their quarterback) have an international conglomerate at their disposal....

Tiger Mistress Upgrades Self To Tiger Baby Mama
A disgraced former journalist claims that a sensationalist documentary claims that a fame-seeking mistress claims she gave birth to Tiger Woods's love child, and was paid to keep quiet. Well, that's all the evidence I need! [The Sun]...

The Tao Of Road Beef: Anonymous NFLer Teaches Us The Lessons Of Keeping Side Tail Happy
"I'm not saying you take them to a steak dinner on a Saturday night, but little gifts here and there show appreciation. Think watches and dresses, maybe some cash." What, no Subway sandwich? [Daily News]...

Here's The Awesome Catch No One Is Talking About Today
In the top of the ninth of Armando Galarraga's fairly routine, ho-hum, complete-game one-hitter, Mark Grudzielanek smacked a ball deep to left-center. Austin Jackson was there with a Willie Mays impression, and history was preserved for Jim Joyce to fuck up. [MLB]...

Armando Galarraga Absolutely Robbed Of A Perfect Game By Umpire's Bad Call
Detroit's Armando Galarraga just threw the 21st perfect game in Major League history and the second one this week. Unfortunately, umpire Jim Joyce turned the 27th out into a infield hit with a horrendously botched call. (UPDATE: Joyce has apologized.)...

Reports: Elin Wants Divorce, Shit-Ton Of Money
Elin's rumored $750 million demand sounds exorbitant, until you divide it by his 20 women, and remember many celebrities have paid much more per affair. If true, Nordegren would vault to No. 2 on the tour money list. [NYDN]...

It's Time For Some Tiger Woods Mistress News
This is not one of Tiger Woods's mistresses. She's just a young lass with a healthy sense of humor propping her hiney up against a painting. "Crouching lady, Tiger banging," if you will. But there's other Tiger Woods mistress news....

Headlines That Get Funnier After Midnight: "Tiger Penis Found At Auckland Airport"
Not a surprise, really ... but how does that explain the neck problem? [Stuff.co.nz]...

The Mets Know How To Seize, Uh ... An Opportunity
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Let's All Watch Baseball With The Sound Off Tonight
Before we go any further, can we all agree that this is just a little bit creepy? The tributes are nice, but I would prefer not to remember Ernie Harwell via cellphone pictures of him basking in the Detroit sun....

The Tiger Woods Injury-Condition Flub You've Been Waiting For All Day
Tiger Woods' bulging disc has forced him to exit The Players Championship and occasioned a Freudian moment from one unfortunate Golf Channel reporter, who called the injury a "bulging dick." H/T Michael....

Commence Your Snickering: Tiger Pulls Out Of The Players With Bulging Disc
Woods is out of The Players Championship with what he thinks is a bulging disc. He had shot a 70-71-71 going into today and now withdraws after knocking a fat double-entendre right down the fairway. [NYT]...

Drunk Golf Fan Taunts Tiger, Gets Tasered At The Players Championship
Travis Parmelee was arrested for disorderly intoxication and summarily tasered by police officers yesterday at the second round of The Players Championship "after he refused to stop heckling Tiger Woods." A Drew Magary fan or regular Hawaiian-shirted, mustachioed hero? [Daily News]...

Ernie Harwell's Wounded Soul
Tiger broadcaster Ernie Harwell passed away Tuesday. Longtime fan and author Peter Hyman suggests his last decade of suffering wasn't entirely health-related....

Ernie Harwell's Baseball, In His Own Words
Go read Harwell's 1981 Hall of Fame induction speech, featuring his oft-told poetic definition of the game that was written in 1955, but still holds true today. [Baseball Almanac]...

Last Night's Winner: Real Players Playing Golf
In sports, everyone is a winner — some people just win better than others. Like every golfer at the Quail Hollow Championship not named Tiger Woods, all of whom might have some peace and quiet and golf-claps, for once....

The Commodification Of Tiger Woods's Whoring Continues Apace
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

PGA Players On Tiger's Steroids, Tiger's Women, Plus Some Other Golf Stuff
A quarter of pros think Woods used PEDs. Eight percent knew what he was up to before his Thanksgiving night crash. Ninety percent of you won't click through to the full survey, now that you know the juicy stuff. [SI]...