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Would Brett Favre Take A Phone Call From The Ice Capades? "I Don't Want To Go Into Hypotheticals," Agent Says
We put in another call to Brett Favre's agent, Bus Cook, this morning. Upon hearing that I was calling from Deadspin, he let out a long sigh, but was gracious enough to stay on the phone. In an effort to expand on ESPN's report from Monday—in which ESPN established via anonymous source that Brett Fa...

Orlando Magic CEO Steps Down, Allegedly After A Late Night Drunk Dial To Dwight Howard
Dwight. Dwight, are you awake? Pick up, man. Dwight, man, I shouldn't be calling you. My buddy says it's too late to be calling anyone, but I just had to tell you. I..love you, Dwight. You're one of my best friends. You know that? I never told anyone that, but you are like the greatest guy....

How A Heisman Finalist's Penis Ended Up On The Internet
We already knew LSU cornerback Tyrann Mathieu was a pro. Forget his onfield play; dude already had an awesome nickname and a failed drug test. But yesterday turned out to be the ultimate rite of passage for Mathieu, as he knocked two major accomplishments off his star athlete checklist in one day: g...

The Two-Fisted, One-Eyed Misadventures Of Sportswriting's Last Badass
George Kimball hung upside down some 70 feet in the cold Manhattan air, still in need of a cigarette. Well, the doctors had said smoking would kill him, hadn't they? The previous autumn, they had found an inoperable cancerous tumor the size of a golf ball in his throat and given him six months to li...

ESPN Has Cut Ties With Matthew Barnaby "Effective Immediately"
After the news broke this morning that analyst Matthew Barnaby had been arrested for a DWI in Clarence, N.Y., an ESPN spokesman informed us that Bristol was "looking into the situation." We just received word that Barnaby's been fired. From ESPN's shit-handling department: "We spoke with Matthew and...

This Is What Happens To Your Face When You Try To Rob An MMA Expert
Anthony Miranda, a 24-year-old from Chicago, allegedly attempted a robbery on the Southwest Side of the city late Friday night. Police say he strolled up to a parked car, asked the driver for a light, and then pulled out a handgun....

Is Winning The Overtime Coin Toss A Blessing Or A Curse?
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

What Losing Jose Reyes Really Means For Mets Fans
In eighth grade I wrote a poem about Jose Reyes, the Miami Marlins' new shortstop. The poem wasn't so good. I wrote it in Reyes's gregarious broken English, in which every third utterance is "you know" or "man." But I had to write something quickly for a class, and in April 2005, nothing captivated ...

Keith Olbermann Insists Suzy Kolber Was Just As Toxic At ESPN As He Was
Below is an excerpt from Those Guys Have All The Fun: Inside The World of ESPN, which is finally in paperback so those readers anxious for more Bristol back-biting don't have to carry around the cumbersome hardcover. The new version includes more bitchy anecdotes from Bill Simmons, further details a...

Tim Tebow Is Making Me Question My Atheism
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

Cotto-Margarito II: Mistakes, Revenge Porn, And The Looming Dread Of Watching Miguel Cotto Fight
We all make mistakes....

Idiot Columnist Writes Idiot Column About Ovechkin And Steroids
John Steigerwald—he of the "Bryan Stow deserved to get beaten into a coma" column—is at it again. This time the Washington (Pa.) Observer-Reporter observer/reporter sets his poorly-focused sights on Alexander Ovechkin. Since his numbers have taken a dip, and also a steroid doctor who Ovechkin has ne...
![ESPN's Matthew Barnaby Pulled Over While Driving On Three Tires, Charged With DWI [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18d44lzdm0ug0jpg.jpg)
ESPN's Matthew Barnaby Pulled Over While Driving On Three Tires, Charged With DWI [UPDATE]
ESPN analyst Matthew Barnaby—also known for a pro hockey career and a brief relationship with Bristol coworker Michelle Beadle— was pulled over in Clarence, N.Y. early this morning and charged with a DWI. Barnaby faced five criminal charges in a domestic dispute case just last May....

Oh, Look. It's Willis McGahee, And It's Willis And McGahee
Your morning roundup for Dec. 5, the day we learned your math professor allegedly ran a meth lab. Photo via Midwest Sports Fans. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Atlanta Braves Reliever Burns Nickelback On Twitter And Nickelback Fires Back
Peter Moylan is a reliever for the Atlanta Braves, apparently. I follow the greatest franchise in the history of sports, so you know, he's not really on my radar. Anyway, this Moylan guy must have gotten back from a Foo Fighters concert and decided Nickelback needed a kick in the ass. The tweet rea...

Ndamukong Suh Crashes Car, Introduces America To Quipster Cop
Early Saturday morning in Portland, Ndamukong Suh lost control of his car (pictured), hitting a tree, a lightpole and a water fountain. Suh was presumably spending his two week Goodell-imposed vacation at home with his family. Or cruising around Portland's "night club district" in his muscle car at...

Wisconsin Punter Flops His Way To Big 10 Championship Glory
Your morning roundup for Dec. 4, the day we got hammered on gummi bears. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

At Least Jerry Sandusky's Dog Understands Him
For some reason passing understanding, Jerry Sandusky sat down with The New York Times this week for an interview. The entire thing was recorded on audiotape and portions of the interview were videotaped. Although you should definitely read and watch—if only to see Sandusky squirm—there's not much ...

Tim Tebow Is A Pretty Good Quarterback
The backlash to the backlash to the backlash is starting: Tim Tebow sucked, then he un-sucked (five and one as a starter!), and now he sucks again. "Denver's defense explains their winning streak!" So the voices are saying....
