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Sometimes Bowling Balls Do Magical Things
BOWLING. Josh Scanlon rolls two strikes in the 10th frame during the Team USA trials. Then the ball comically slips out of his hands on his third shot. The ball takes it from there....

A Former Player Responds To Roger Goodell's Open Letter
What a buzzkill. On the eve of the playoffs, just when fans' excitement in the sport is cresting, Roger Goodell tripped on his shoestrings again, puked all over his keyboard, and then hit "send."...

John Salley Story Corner: Spider Misses The Bus
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: an elaborate ruse to avoid being late....

Dan Shaughnessy Is Awful
I'd be remiss if I didn't point out this execrable column from Dan Shaughnessy that ran on SI's website earlier this week, and is yet another triumph of idiotic Boston provincialism....

Adventures In Accidental Anal Intercourse
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Bert Blyleven Got In <em>Because</em> Voters Are Irrational, And Other Hall Of Fame Revelations
This is Regressing, a new, numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard Sports Analysis Collective. Today: how a weird tic of Hall of Fame voters helped put Bert Blyleven in Cooperstown....

The Cruel Bastard’s Way To Fix Pass Interference
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Let's Marvel At The Perfect Absurdity Of This ESPN Guy's HOF Ballot
Here's the ballot mailed in by Barry Stanton, ESPN news editor: Jack Morris, Edgar Martinez, Tino Martinez, Don Mattingly, B.J. Surhoff. I shit you not. B.J. Surhoff....

Barry Melrose Needs A Beer, And Other Observations From The Behatted And Be-Styxed Winter Classic
Our puckhead has returned from Pittsburgh with inside information on Dan Bylsma's hat, an autographed photo of Styx, and the lasting image of Barry Melrose waiting in beerless frustration at the bar....

Is Being A Best Man Overrated?
Before we get to the funbagginess, today marks the five-year anniversary of the first blog post I ever wrote....

SB Nation's Top Sports GIFs Of 2010 Is Quite Outstanding
Prepare to spend the rest of the afternoon not earning your undeserved paycheck more than usual. SB Nation's Jon Bois put in enough overtime for everyone this year. [SB Nation]...

Here's The Favre Sexual Harassment Lawsuit
The massage therapists' lawsuit — against Brett Favre; the Jets; and the team's massage coordinator, Lisa Ripi — is below. If you'd like analysis, please consult the many Americans conversant in both the suit's particulars and the relevant case law....

Happy New Year: There Is An American Ryder Cup Captain's Dick Shot For Sale
Somebody wake Dan Jenkins from his afternoon nap and fetch his slippers because there's a wayward PGA penis on the loose. Proud sportswriters, please test that 2011 resolution to ignore this type of tawdry checkbook journalism....

Brett Favre Sued For Sexual Harassment
Two team massage therapists—yeah, these two—have sued Favre and the Jets for sexual harassment. The women claim he propositioned them via text message (for a threesome), and weren't re-hired by the Jets after they complained. And here we go....

The Wonderful World Of Twitter Prostitutes, Starring Ronny Turiaf And Ms. Candy Deepthroat (UPDATE)
Twitter has opened up a whole new world where skirt-chasers and jersey-chasers can pursue each other with a minimum of fuss. At least until the girl puts the athlete on blast....

If You Mess With The Skunk, You Get Face Punched
So, former pro wrestler Christopher "The Skunk" Antal, who lost a mayoral bid in Massachusetts and pretended to urinate on a Brazilian flag on his cable-access show, was just charged with punching a 59-year-old woman in the face....

NHL Winter Classic Report: HOCKEY!
Our puckhead Katie Bakes is dicking around scenic Pittsburgh for the NHL Winter Classic. She has filed the following icy report....

Here Comes The Ass: Deadspin’s Worst Of 2010
I love Worst of the Year articles. So let us now eschew all the good things from 2010 like Winter's Bone and iPad porn and spend some time wallowing in SHEER SUCK....

The Wonders And Weirdness Of ESPN In 3D
Patrick Sauer recently attended a viewing of the first-ever NBA telecast on ESPN's new 3D channel, and it was a glimpse into our strange future: floating heads, precision celebrity high-fives, and lots and lots of really unreal detail....

Gregg Easterbrook Is A Haughty Dipshit
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....