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What Is The Most Indispensable Cheese To Humankind?
Before we get to the Funbag, one quick announcement: There will probably not be a live Funbag on Thursday. But don't despair. You'll always have your raging alcoholism to help fill the void....

Actually, Tom Brady Is Getting A Raise
When the Patriots leaked news of Tom Brady's "three-year, $27 million" contract extension, it appeared on the face the rare instance of an athlete taking less money to make his team more competitive. We warned you that appearances can be deceiving, but without the actual contract details we were lim...

Deadspin NBA Shit List: Antoine Walker, The Shimmying Chucker
A celebration of the NBA's most infuriating players, both past and present. Read other NBA Shit List entries here....

Don't Look Now, But The NHL's Best Hockey Is Out West
You could be forgiven for feeling a twinge of nostalgia for the Western Conference yesterday, after news emerged that the NHL is nearing an agreement on radical realignment. The new setup is better almost every way: less travel, more geographic rivalries, the chance for every team to host every othe...

The Sports Fan: What I Learned From Three Days Of Watching Baseball With Bill Murray
In 1990, Peter Richmond spent three days with Bill Murray in Chicago, eating and drinking and watching ballgames at Wrigley Field. He wrote about the experience for The National Sports Daily. His story was recently republished on Bronx Banter and appears here with permission....

NFL GMs Want To Know If Manti Te'o Is Gay
The NFL scouting combine is an utterly useless event that exists for the sole purpose of maintaining the league's grip on the consciousness of the American sports fan as far into the offseason as possible. We only pay attention to it because we are told to pay attention to it. It's like the Valenti...

The Chinese Slam Dunk Contest Was A Pit Of Sadness
The CBA held its all-star game in Guangzhou last night, and like in past years, it was kind of a mess. (The festivities took place between the end of the regular season and the beginning of the playoffs, so anyone who took part had either mentally checked out for the year or had much more important ...

Seth MacFarlane Wasn't The Worst Oscar Host Ever: In Defense Of A Boob
For Seth MacFarlane's critics, Sunday night was supposed to be the moment we finally got to see the guy get his comeuppance. A "billion" viewers around the world, one of the most prestigious gigs in all of entertainment: As Oscar host, this was his chance to justify his swiftly, perhaps inexplicably...

Your 100 Percent Bile-Filled Oscars Live Blog
It's finally here! Oscar Night! Speeches! Safe wardrobe choices! Four million references to "old Hollywood glamour"! Diet Pepsi commercials! Tap dance montages! THE WHOLE SHEBANG. I can't wait. I hope you've had as much Chardonnay as I've had, because I am feeling BITCHAY. ...

YouTube Determines That NASCAR Does Not Have A Copyright On Everything It Claims To Have Copyrighted
Following yesterday's frightening crash in NASCAR's Nationwide Series DRIVE4COPD 300 at Daytona, controversy surged following NASCAR's decision to pull fan video of crash debris entering the grandstands. ...

50 Cent's Attempt To Kiss Erin Andrews Was One For The Ages
In a sports moment rivaled only by Joe Namath's come-ons to Suzy Kolber, rapper 50 Cent—inexplicably making the infield rounds at the Daytona 500—took Fox's Erin Andrews to the Candy Shop of love, though it appears EA wasn't digging it so much. Before the race even started, we've had a massive wre...
![Crash At NASCAR Nationwide Race At Daytona Leaves Kyle Larson's Car Torn In Half By Fence, Spectators Injured By Debris [UPDATING]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Crash At NASCAR Nationwide Race At Daytona Leaves Kyle Larson's Car Torn In Half By Fence, Spectators Injured By Debris [UPDATING]
Tony Stewart won today's DRIVE4COPD 300 at Daytona, but all anyone will remember about the race is how it ended for another driver, Kyle Larson. A massive wreck at the checkered flag sent Larson's car through the catch fence, sending debris and even the car's engine itself hurtling toward spectat...

The 15 Or So Most Watchable Teams In College Basketball: An Occasional Ranking
A weekly (or so) ranking of college basketball teams on the basis of watchability and with very little regard to how good they might be. ...

Rain, Trains, And Dead Kids: What To Put In Your Movie If You Want To Win An Oscar
Welcome to Dataspin, a weekly data visualization of whatever the fuck....

FIBA Is Prepared To Say D.C. High School Star Junior Etou Is 18 Years Old, Even Though FIBA Was Sure He's 20
Looks like an already-messy situation on the D.C. hoops scene is about to get messier. Junior Etou, a breakout star at Bishop O'Connell High School in Arlington, Va., is about to turn 18 all over again....

The 2013 Hater's Guide To The Oscars
Time to put on our bitchy pants and say shitty things about the Oscars and everyone nominated for the Oscars. Now, according to Entertainment Weekly, this year’s Oscars will be “song-and-dance heavy,” which is arguably the most terrifying thing I have ever read. The Grammys were two weeks ago. That ...

Sext-Happy Former Toledo Running Coach Denies Sex Harassment, Other Claims; Former Runners Say He's Lying
On Saturday, Kevin Hadsell, the former director of the University of Toledo's track and cross country programs, sat down with a local news station for his first interview since our story about his departure amid sexual harassment claims. He was by turns defiant and penitent. He cried some, too, as h...

Ronda Rousey, Bro Queen: Why Is The UFC So Stupid About Women?
The UFC would like very much for you to care about its women's bantamweight champion Ronda Rousey, and you probably should. She is, beyond being quite good at hurting people, nothing short of fascinating. There really is no other explanation for how a once-anonymous Olympic judoka, who then transiti...

Kobe Bryant Guarantees The Lakers Will Make The Playoffs
What do Dwight Howard, Steve Nash, Pau Gasol, and Metta World Peace have in common with Chris Mihm, Chucky Atkins, Lamar Odom, and Caron Butler? If the season ended today, those would be the only two supporting casts in Kobe Bryant's career with which he didn't make the postseason. One of these rost...
![Ladies, J.R. Smith's Twitter Come-On Will Have You Sopping Wet [UPDATE: J.R. Responds]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18fdc77fdul2ejpg.jpg)
Ladies, J.R. Smith's Twitter Come-On Will Have You Sopping Wet [UPDATE: J.R. Responds]
Last month, as the Knicks were in Philadelphia to play the Sixers, J.R. Smith was up to his old tricks. J.R.'s got something of a history with Twitter, and women, (and asses), so it's not like the young lady who chatted him up via direct message couldn't have known what she was getting into. Still, ...