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Return Of The Revenge Of The Customized Jersey
We asked for more. You delivered more....and more....and more. Whether it's a duct taped Brett Favre jersey or turning a beer cooler into a motorcycle, America has not lost its ingenuity, nor its desire for custom, DIY nonsense....

Bosom Buddies: A Correspondence With Melissa Lima
This job, unlike many others in "sports media," provides plenty of absurd scenarios on a weekly basis. But this one, involving Jose Lima's ex-wife, Melissa, thrusts us headlong into Eugene Ionesco territory....

Redskins Season Quickly Devolving Into Roland Emmerich Film
Oh, man. This Washington Redskins season. Let this be a lesson to you other teams: if you're not gonna contend for the playoffs, please have the courtesy to implode in the most hilarious manner possible....

Bad Beats: Can Subliminal Messaging Lure Browns Bettors?
A weekly look at smart plays, oddball propositions and all your tales of gambling woe....

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Citizens Bank Park
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The Philadelphia Phillies' Citizens Bank Park....

God Bless Ronan Tynan’s Anti-Semitism
If you're heading to Yankee Stadium for Game 1 of the ALCS tonight, you can forget about hearing Ronan Tynan sing "God Bless America" during the seventh inning. Know why? Because he hates Jews! WOOHOO!...

Saints Rebuild New Orleans For Fourth Consecutive Year
October 15, 2009: "Saints Revive NOLA's Spirit" by CNN. Does anyone feel like they've heard this story before?...

These Announcers Aren’t Drunk Enough. Jamboroo, Week 6
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

More Commenting Changes Are Afoot: Wake Up And Read On...
Good morning, early risers/late night partiers. It's going to be a hectic, confusing day here at Deadspin (and most of Gawker media's sites) because, once again, they're dicking around with the comments recipe. Let's chop it up....

These Athletes Are Going To Hell
A fundamentalist Baptist church is making headlines for their upcoming book/album burning, but their website reveals a hidden treasure: the Index Of Ungodly Athletes....

So, Just How Is Bill Simmons’ 30 For 30 Project?
The Sports Fella, and the network he fights with and occasionally works for, have put a lot of time and effort into rolling out the new "30 for 30" documentary series. So how is it?...

Good Ol' Poise
What have we here? Two young, relatively unformed quarterbacks who play efficiently enough in winning efforts to be anointed with hollow praise? And they're going head-to-head? America had a poisegasm yesterday — and perhaps found a new talisman of poise....

Fire Up The Self-Pity Machine, IT’S BLACK SUNDAY!
And so it was that, come Monday morning, the denizens of New England awoke to a world covered in thick, black ash. A world that knew neither hope nor joy, but only self-involved douchiness....

When It's 8 A.M. And You Look Like This, You Might Be Close To Death
Football season is upon us, which means that thousands of angry, horny, feisty pretend fans will converge upon this great nation's red cup-littered parking lots to participate in traditional tailgating revelry. These are not those stories...

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Touching The Hem Of His Garment Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

Revenge Of The Customized Jerseys
Our personalized jersey collection has become so popular and so big, we had to add another room. The closet is now a walk-in. (But we can do more. Keep sending them.)...

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Kauffman Stadium
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The Kansas City Royals' Kauffman Stadium....

The Bitter Tears Of The Best Fans In Baseball
In the wake of Matt Holliday's fateful decision to play James Loney's soft liner off his testicles, Cardinals Nation expressed several sentiments unbecoming the best fans in baseball but at least cleared all five stages of grief....

Old-School Skunk And The Ripe-Tomato Eyes Of Pete Johnson
"Dark Side of the Locker Room" is a compendium of journalists' bizarre, amusing and previously undocumented encounters with athletes (and often athletes' genitalia). Got a story? Send it to [email protected]....

The Most Hopeless Franchise In Football. Jamboroo, Week 5
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....