tv Page 56 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Did ESPN Photoshop Dwight Gooden's Mug Shot On To A Suit?
Doc Gooden called into the Scott Van Pelt radio show today, but since it is also simulcast on ESPN2, they needed a suitable head shot to show viewers. Or failing that, a police mugshot with a suit painted over it....

Austria Bans Zidane Head-Butt Adverts For Promoting Violence
Austrian telly chiefs have pulled a series of adverts showing people imitating Zinedine Zidane's infamous 2006 World Cup final attack on Marco Materazzi, claiming "they convey that violence can be used to solve conflicts"....

Perhaps The Most Fascinating "Imperfect Game" Reaction You'll See
A West Virginia man, dipping and wearing short shorts, watches the ninth inning of Armando Galarraga's masterpiece with his young children. Hilarity ensues....

Like All Rich And Graying New York Icons, Keith Hernandez's Mustache Summers In The Hamptons
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Watch An Intern Talk About Kobe Bryant On CNN
For some reason, CNN asked me for an interview after all that Kobe Bryant photo-shoot business and the Photoshopping you all did. Here it is. I am at your mercy. At least the CNN folks let me wear a shirt. [CNN.com]...

Girl Sleeps Through Her Own Interview During Rangers Game
I have no idea what's going on in this interview, but neither does the girl who is apparently part of it. Funny that the elbow to the head didn't perk her up. [Thanks to Eric R. for video]...

Joe Biden Mourns The 29 Dead West Virginia Miners By Somberly Crapping On Rich Rodriguez
Here's our walking facepalm of a vice president, speaking at a memorial for the dead miners: "They loved hunting, fishing, riding horses and four-wheelers. They hated the way Coach Rodriguez left West Virginia for Michigan." [TNR]...

Robert Lee Will Sell You A Mobile Home, Terrify You
What does saying "a bouncer in Birmingham hit me in the face with a crescent wrench five times" have to do with selling mobile homes? Not a thing, but I'll be damned if Robert Lee isn't a great pitchman. [YouTube]...

The Masters Invaded By Airborne Pranksters Asking Tiger Woods About "Bootyism"
Augusta National's authoritarian fussbudgets do not yet hold dominion over the skies, as proved by whoever hired this plane to circle above The Masters today. Also, it's $1 wing night at Déjà Vu. [Video via ESPN, surprisingly.]...

After Coal Mine Blast, Writer Asks The Important Question: Would WVU Have Won In The NCAA Final?
Answer: Yes. "The Mountaineers would have taken the emotional hit, confronted the occasion and done everything to prevail." So noted. [Charleston Daily Mail]...

Some Losses Are More Painful Than Others
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

They May Be Smug Unlikeable Bastards, But Damned If They Don't Have Good Foot Doctors
WVU's Darryl Bryant was treated by an orthopedic surgeon from Duke, in hopes of being ready to face the Blue Devils on Saturday. Would you be shocked if he implanted a time bomb in that foot? [News & Observer]...

West Virginia Players Celebrate Kentucky Win, Rip Off Dance Moves
Da'Sean Butler and John Flowers, no strangers to the art of dance, celebrated West Virginia's win by doing the John Wall Dance. Alert the Lexington Intellectual Property Society of this egregious clownin' immediately! [Via The Big Lead]...

I Was There...Being Paris Hilton's Manslave
Here's an unexpected submission. One of the young men selected to carry Paris Hilton during MTV's Cancun Spring Break shitshow emailed his experience and, I must say, it is something else....

Cousins Love Fest: Your West Virginia-Kentucky Open Thread
John Calipari goes for his first Final Four trip, Huggybear and the Mountaineers try to stick it to John Beilein one more time for good measure. Predictions on DeMarcus Cousins' weight in seven years below....

Sports Website With Silly Name Makes Cameo On "Southland"
No, it's nowhere near as great as the "You're With Me Leather" spot on Las Vegas from a couple years ago, but it is always flattering to be parodied. Watch the clip after the jump....

"Paris Hilton Was Taking It From Behind From Some Rock Star..."
Here are some fun recollections from one former MTV producer who worked on several of the network's debauchery-filled Spring Break broadcasts in the early 2000's. He wishes to remain anonymous....

Appalachia! F-Yeah! Your 7ish Open Thread
Butler takes on Syracuse (in Salt Lake City), and Washington takes on West Virginia (in Syracuse). Will the Big East's reputation be saved tonight, or will it be taunted and booed until throats are sore?...

Video: Yes, If You Were Wondering, A Samurai <em>Can</em> Slice A Baseball In Half
Watch as a samurai unsheaths his katana and splits a baseball in twain as it approaches the plate. I think there's something in the rulebooks to prevent this. [TechEBlog]...

WVU Hotel Room Videos Are No Less Embarrassing Than A Sex Tape
Let's face it: even without a curfew, there's not a heck of a lot to do in Buffalo. But, confined to their hotel rooms, the Mountaineers are making the most of it, acting like teenage girls at a slumber party....